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'Burning your boat' -- why this is so important

Discussion in 'Porn Addiction' started by Septimus, Jun 4, 2016.

  1. Septimus

    Septimus Fapstronaut

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    One of the tools I developed in my own, personal plan was what I called, "Burn your boat." If you ever saw the movie, "Mutiny on the Bounty," when the men who mutineed arrived at an island, the leader burnt the boat. Why did he do that? Because he knew that when the going got tough, they might be tempted to go back.

    So for me, this meant deleting everything, cancelling memberships, and, importantly, clearing out histories, including search histories. Today, I got a reminder of what this is important.

    I was on Facebook, and I used the "search" function there -- something I don't often use. And guess what? A search I did about six weeks ago, which I shouldn't have, popped up. And guess what I did? I clicked on it. And I spent a few minutes looking at suggestive images, before I came to my senses. It's like, all of a sudden, I could feel it -- what I'd been "missing." But then, I also remembered how much misery I had, and how hard I'd worked to get where I am.

    So I left that page...and I burnt the boat. I cleared out the search history.

    No, it doesn't guarantee anything; it's just a tool. Success is often a matter not merely of really big decisions, but lots of really small ones, that add up.
     
    Mighty Wolf, Owari, Headspace and 7 others like this.
  2. CreatedRight

    CreatedRight Fapstronaut

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  3. CreatedRight

    CreatedRight Fapstronaut

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    And from another great book..."you prepare your horse for battle, but the victory is the Lord's."
    Burning the boat for no returning, is like like making ready the horse for battle. Every step and routine to burn or distroy that which leads to electronic stimulation, is preparation for battle. Make a list of 3 ways of preparing your horse for battle or burning your boat; 1) I will remove devices from private use and secret areas. 2) I will unplug my PC from the wall, leave it unplugged, until I need the PC for legitimate use. Thus, to turn on P, I must also decide to plug a device into power.
    3) Change your password to IMayJackOff when you log in. Maybe a deterrent to visiting P sites, which makes me think twice.
     
    Last edited: Jun 4, 2016
  4. Yep. Some people literally have 'burning ceremonies' with their 3d porn.
     
    CreatedRight likes this.
  5. New Life Mantra 333

    New Life Mantra 333 Fapstronaut

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    Good way of putting it "burning the boat" to basically fight for victory and win because there is no option to retreat!

    i burnt a huge boat a few months back, facebook itself, that dam site made me feel nothing but depression and caused nothing but anxiety,low self esteem and put me under pressure on a daily basis to promote a fake life that i was simply not experiencing in reality, it was the best thing i have ever done, no more having to feel like shit comparing myself to others or feeling under pressure to be a narcisist etc,

    i have always said that "depression + facebook = depression x 2", i think many people are waking up to the fact that facebook is a joke that has many negative effects on peoples mental health and general well being, and i doubt in the future people will need to hypothectically burn it like a boat because the amount of people leaving it these days show that its nothing but a "sinking ship":)

    lets hope in the future the porn industry sinks like a lead weight too!
     
  6. ILoathePorn

    ILoathePorn Distinguished Fapstronaut

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    Awesome post! I am going to start using that term if it is ok. I to am getting tired and sick of facebook and am actually thinking of deleting my account. Not just disabling it but deleting it. Nobody even really posts how they are actually doing on there, it is always posts about some article or video they have watched. It is pretty lame. I just need to copy all of the posts out of our private group we made for our daughter along with the photos and videos. Of course they don't have a way to import all that stuff out so will have to do it manually. Will take a awhile but am going to be starting that project soon. Anyways. Very good post.
     
  7. Stand

    Stand Fapstronaut

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    Cracking post and well worth it. Get rid of that stuff!
     
  8. Be Normal

    Be Normal Fapstronaut

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    What about all your friends on facebook? Do you miss some of the people on there?

    I haven't logged into facebook in over 10 months and i don't really know why. I deleted my snapchat awhile later, before I found NoFap. I just think the media is annoying and mindless. My friends I hang out with obsess over facebook and will say they tagged me for an invite somewhere instead of calling me or texting and they know I don't go on facebook, so i miss out on things they are planning. I feel like they are doing it on purpose now.

    I stopped using facebook for the same reasons you felt too, I didn't know how to put it into words, but now i do. actually the main reason I haven't logged back in because I don't want to see the reply from a girl I dated when I messaged her "happy birthday" i kinda feel like a coward and I am thinking about going back on facebook to check things out, but I never feel like its the right time. especially since I keep relapsing. Even my mom has told me I need to change my profile picture because it doesn't look good haha.

    I just relapsed again and I think It has to do with people on here disappearing or never replying back, I don't think I have enough support. So I will unconsciously think there is no reason to come on here because I know I won't have any alerts or messages to come back to. I had an accountability partner but we don't keep in contact much anymore, probably because I didn't reply back all the time.

    I have all the information right here people are telling me and I know what I need to do, but I give up all the time now. I made it 75 days and I already know I should not think about what I did before and focus on the now, but I can't. Even if i google ways to how to be motivated, I still don't know how to be motivated, like I have no fuel to run off or my self esteem is completely gone again. I'm starting to get really frustrated with myself. I know what to I need to do but at the same time I don't know or want to do it. I've turned into a complete miserable person again. I've lost interest in all my goals I had, goals I had so much excitement for. I have nothing to look forward to in my life again

    I've had so much advise on here and when I read it, it hits me right in the heart, but then I don't put any of it into affect.
    What is wrong with me? I hate this feeling of being stuck like this even when I know what to do, the words are right there. I write down what I need to do by hand, I've written down a summary of the entire rebooting basics by hand, almost word for word, and it took me over 4 hours write and study it so I wouldn't forget that knowledge and now I forgot it.
     
    New Life Mantra 333 likes this.
  9. New Life Mantra 333

    New Life Mantra 333 Fapstronaut

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    No i dont miss anyone on facebook, im happier now than i have ever been because i have removed the very unessecary "middle man" of social media that stood between me and my "real friends", before i left facebook i changed my birth date and waited to see how many people would actually remember or even care about sending me a birthday well wishing etc,
    well on the day of my birthday i recieved none except from 3 real friends who knew "without" being prompted by facebook and they didnt just post a facebook message they also rang me and called to visit me in "reality"! now its no crime to miss or forget someones birthday, i have been guilty of this in the past but its amazing to see how many people "need" facebook to remember dates like that!

    if anyone you know does not want to contact you in a more traditional or straight forward way then im sorry to say but they are not real friends they are meerly online acquaintances and they only ever "half care" about you etc, theres so much i could say about how bad facebook is but ill post a few videos instead below!





    as for how you feel about P -addiction, keep on trying, many of us have relapsed many times but the more you try to better yourself the stronger you will become, it took me a very long time to get to where i am now and believe it or not im a much happier person than i was, dont give up, the very fact that you are on nofap shows that you want a change, well that is victory number one if you keep on going you "will" reach victory after victory as you become stronger! but also keep in mind that "internet addiction" is what drags us before a screen time and time again! keep a check on that too not just P- addiction!
     
    Owari likes this.
  10. Be Normal

    Be Normal Fapstronaut

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    wow those videos are awesome, finally I know there are other people who feel the same way as I do. I liked the 3rd video the most. Thanks for that man. A few months ago I had goals to just leave america and go travel the world, it is something I really want to do. I don't want to sit here and slave for money for the rest of my life. I want to be out there creating new experiences every day. I don't know why I'm still here
     
  11. New Life Mantra 333

    New Life Mantra 333 Fapstronaut

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    hey no problem glad the vids helped, i know a lot of people are here for p- addiction but i cant help but feel that vast amount of us are also addicted to the internet itsself, now some people might never have any negative effects from constant use of the internet but there are millions of people who are simply fed up with it, i know i am, that last video has literally been my life non-stop for years now and since finding nofap i have been finally given the chance to learn the science behind what is happening ,i can see clearly now that this cycle must stop, id like to think in the future that most people will eventually "go retro" and consentrate more on their lives in reality than wasting years obsessing about their online facebook/social media lives, its all completely unessecary and a serious mental health/addiction problem, anyway all i can say is that i am becoming a much happier person and actually doing lots more stuff these days (going places/metting new people etc) since i decided to leave all these"online illusions" behind because thats all any of it is, an illusion, reality is were our true energies must be focused on!

    so as for you man, you want to travel and see the world, well the only thing stopping you is "you"
    i think you should stop saying "id like to" tavel the world and start saying "i will be" travelling the world!

    start making a plan now, if it takes a year or more to get it organised with finances/family duties/education/work etc then work through each one step by step and get to a point when you can book the flights etc then you will be definatly going! but take your time dont put to much pressure on yourself, just step by step and there is no reason why you cant achieve your dream!

    and while you are out there travelling the world always remember that the best cameras you will ever own are your eyes,
    the best news feed/wall/status update/memory log is your brain inside your head,
    the best way you will ever communicate with another human being is through speech,
    and the best emoji is your very own face!

    either way you can do this, as shia says "just do it"
     

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