Hi i think you all know my struggle..

Hello im a 20 years old. i dont know where to start.. I'm not 100% sure if masturbation ruined my life but i can assure you it didnt make it any better.

Today its saturday night, i went out about an hour ago to the store to buy condoms, but dont get too impressed, i was going to use them to jerk off, i know how pathetic it sounds, ive never done that before tho (i guess its the urge).

So as i walk to the store i see two of my friends sitting in the trunk of a car hanging out with some girls, i tried to ignore them but one of them yelled at me "hey man where u going!?",so i said pretty nervous "uuuhm to the store!" then the girls started laughing like if they knew what i was up to, i felt pretty embarrased and sad, but not enough from keeping me from buying them anyway... i mean what am i doing?? i should be with them!,i should be talking to one of those girls... i shouldnt lay to waste the money i spent...

when i got home i looked at myself in the mirror, and then i saw a picture of me when i was 7 years old and i asked myself.... would he be proud of you? would he like to be like you?..

so i stored the condoms in my backpack for when i really need them, took some deep breaths and now im here, trying to get rid of this disease with you guys haha .

i really hope you can help me change, now im going to take a really cold shower.

i hope this is enough for an introduction
good luck to you all.

 

Thanks i feel better with your suppport, but you're right because im responsible for myself...

And yes its kinda fun, ive never kept record of activities like this.

Thanks alot again my goal is to abstian for one month and then forever.

good luck