Shouldn't nofap be a way of life instead of just rebooting ?

Yes, that is the point for many, I believe. But some are here just for 30 60 or 90 days and that's their whole purpose.

Also, day counting is a tangible way to determine if someone is making some sort of progress and exerting the appropriate self-control. A reset after 1 day is just not the same as a rest after 301 days. The latter includes an accumulated level of expectation that this problem is over, and yet there you are back at day 1.

So while what you say is technically right, and the path to quitting altogether, it is also ignoring the emotional state of quitting, which if we could do, we probably wouldn't reset in the first place

 

I think the 90 day challenge and its conditions are a way to market quitting porn to newcomers. It's easier to take up a challenge when it has clearly defined goals. At least I came here because I was given a precise guideline of what I had to do to get better. If the page said "change your approach to life by making fundamental changes to every aspect of the way you live" I would've probably closed the tab thinking NoFap was another general self-improvement program.

Of course, once you get deeper into quitting you realize that counting the days is not even half of success. But I guess we haven't come with a better idea of how to gauge progress at a glance.

 

When you have a large goal. You should break it down into smaller chunks. Hence the 30-60-90 etc

 

For me 90 day , or 120 are a ''goal'' that i need to reach . And for some people its also the same thing but at the END of the 90 day , its the end for them .... so they relapse or dont quit other addiction ( because the challenge was only nofapp , not NO video game , facebook , coldshower exetera ) .

I m agree when u talk about a way of life .

it can be 90 hard mode > then easy mode > be allowd to masturbate ( maybe like each 25 day , for not having Wet dream )... Everyone chosse whats better for them .

Be carefull when u finish the challenge , to dont become addict to something else , to M .... exetera exetera
and that why if the challenge is a way of life it can be a good option !!!! But for me M each 25-30 ( if dont have sex ) is also a good idea . ( i mean it can be the next step , u know like a guy who was addict to alcool , and who can know drink 1 glass , and then say NO to an other one )

i just want to say , this is what i think NOW . im still at 50 day soo i dont realy know if its the good way to do it ... but im sure about one thing !!! this challenge , hard or easy mode have a lot of bénefits

 

and yeah 90-120 day is just a goal if your in hard mode ... to switch to easy mode

it dosnt matter how many day you do , the essential is to have good habit and be more strong when it come to addiction ... dont say yes to easy pleasure all the time ! say NO

 

For yours truly 90 days is a piece of cake since I am going to reach that this Saturday. What I find challenging for me is the mental aspect because I wonder if I can ever get rid of porn scenes in my head if I get intimate with someone. Hell I can go on forever without PMOing again. Porn and masturbation are the least of my problems. It is this mental hold on my psyche where I can only climax with porn scenes in my head that is my major battle.

If you turn your passions and fighting inner demons as a form of lifestyle instead of some form of constant struggle your chance of success is much higher and have some great fun along the way.

 

I took nofap as a reboot and ended up relapsing on day 85. It is supposed to be a lifestyle but a goal in mind like 90 day, 120 days can help motivate you.

 

You are right it should be a way of life but we aren't use to it and we are trying to adopt it by achieving a particular mark/days, since sexual desire isn't easy to control we end up relapsing , but one should remember that at least he tried to overcome it . So i think the main objective of NoFap is to build will power in us to overcome our addictions and best way is to avoid thinking of ( fapping / NoFap ) any thing tempting or related to pmo , but of a way to become a strong man with undefeated will power that only can assure success in this initiative(NOFAP ).

I have tried many way to curb this habit and found that one should not over think about it cause in the end you will end up doing , so instead of thinking NoFap as a way of life one should adopt doing productive work and plan about the future , initiate himself in other spheres of life and habits it may be study , fitness(gym) , social activity or any other thing that one feels improves him.

Peace .

PS : I realized this after relapsing after 12 days . But with this i learned that i lack will power (power to control yourself from temptations like sex , video games , watching tv , gossips etc ) so to overcome this one need to be established in self discipline. So the only solution to all Nofap , pmo problems is basically self - discipline .
At the end of the story :
If you dont have discipline you cannot overcome your fears , addictions or limitations and you will end up sticking to them and the in turn stick with you .

 

You are right it should be a way of life but we aren't use to it and we are trying to adopt it by achieving a particular mark/days, since sexual desire isn't easy to control we end up relapsing , but one should remember that at least he tried to overcome it . So i think the main objective of NoFap is to build will power in us to overcome our addictions and best way is to avoid thinking of ( fapping / NoFap ) any thing tempting or related to pmo , but of a way to become a strong man with undefeated will power that only can assure success in this initiative(NOFAP ).

I have tried many way to curb this habit and found that one should not over think about it cause in the end you will end up doing , so instead of thinking NoFap as a way of life one should adopt doing productive work and plan about the future , initiate himself in other spheres of life and habits it may be study , fitness(gym) , social activity or any other thing that one feels improves him.

Peace .

PS : I realized this after relapsing after 12 days . But with this i learned that i lack will power (power to control yourself from temptations like sex , video games , watching tv , gossips etc ) so to overcome this one need to be established in self discipline. So the only solution to all Nofap , pmo problems is basically self - discipline .
At the end of the story :
If you dont have discipline you cannot overcome your fears , addictions or limitations and you will end up sticking to them and the in turn stick with you .

 

Its pretty clear for me about what i want to do . its hard to explain ( with mi bad level in english )
Yes i will M again , but as an exercice to sex (so dont finish in 1 minute , and no its not a trick to DO it).... and i totaly know that im the kind of people that become addict realy easly ( not realy anymore with NOFAP ... i stop sugar , video game , facebook , Now i can play 30 min and then say ok its enought , or drink a beer and dont finish the little bottle ( because i dont have too , because i dont want ...)

when i talk about that one day i will M again , im not sure about ''if sex can be enought'' and for the moment im totaly fine without M . So maybe mi opinion will change ! but if i do as i say i will do it every 30 day or not ... or maybe after 78 day , ( but not as an habit , or fall into addiction. , and not during an urge ... )

but its an idea , i dont have a GF yet ... so maybe after the challenge i will just go seduce girl grrrrrrrrrrrrrrr , and all will be fine

i will be very carefull with this point ^_^ , i dont want to newfap member to think this is what to do . What u need to do right now is 90-120 day hard mode
, but not only that !!! try to get out of your confort zone , to make thing that u want to make exetera exetera . The challenge give me the time , the energie , and mind ( i mean now i can dream , and i have better memory .. just because i stop P )

 

for the benefit ^_^ ( not only PMO hard mode but also cold shower , sport , sleep well , confort zone, point of view )
today was a realy good day .

There is a lot of benefits
- More time
- More energie ( + with sport )
- i smiling a lot ( and sing )
- Girls notice me more ( a lot ) , ^_^ and i can look at her in the eyes .
- i can say stop to a lot of ''little addiction'' , stop procrastinating a little
- dont have a lot of urge anymore
- 2 wet dream during this 50 day .... i was scary at the first , now its ok

And today was a great day ( i level up i thing :O ) .
i wrote a lot of idea into a ''note book'' , funny stuff ( for humour on youtube )
write your idea guys !!! is a realy cool experience , everyone of you have so much brillant idea
i also draw a picture of what life i want to have ( i will put the link tomorow ... and it make me realy happy , so much emotion , drawing is realy something amazing )

 

Yes, it should. 90 days (or whatever number you choose) is not an absolute cure forever more. However it is an important milestone as most people report significant changes at the regularly mentioned milestones that make it a bit easier to manage than it is on, say for example, day 4.

When you're struggling through day 13, having hope that day 30, day 60, and day 90 will be easier is all you've got sometimes.

 

Absolutely.

 

The day count is an important part of getting a jump start on any addiction. The pain and frustration of a relapse can not be taken away. But to attempt to only lapse and not " fall off the wagon completely" ; that is a huge help. I'm 54 so no masturbation feels right for me . I did it too much too long as a self medication type life style. If I'm not having sex; a wet dream sounds like it would be nice. natural. Unless sex is happening; semen retention is the name of my game. Porn is the poison.