My Journey to Self-mastery And Becoming The Strongest Version of Myself

Day 1
Hello everyone!
I am 17 years old high school student from the middle east, I have been struggling with masturbation since I was 14, and like the most of you, I experienced all the harmful effects that comes with it: Weakness, fatigue, lack of motivation, social anxiety, acne, guilt and self resentment..etc.
I came across the NoFap months ago but didn't consider to partake in the challenge, I read a lot about sexual transmutation and how to cultivate the sexual energy to transform my life, and that is the main reason why I am here; I want to achieve all the goals I've set to myself and be the best in everything I do.

I will try to share my progress with you everyday so you can grow stronger as well!

 

Nice to meet you Ibrahim! Yes I'm a big fan of Elliot Hulse and I spent a lot of my time studying his work. I'm from Iraq but I've been in Jordan for over 7 years.
Thanks for sharing your story!

Thank you all for your support, I'll keep you guys updated with my progress!

 

Day 0?
I relapsed this morning, I usually MO at that time, I'll try to fill every morning with work so I keep my mind off of it.

 

Day 3
Everything is going great! I can feel this "energy" growing more and more! I am more alert and more aggressive. I almost slipped several times these days but every time I think about MO, I just remember why I am doing this and all the support that you guys provide. The forum is filled with success stories and people who want to change as much as I do, so I feel that we have a common goal to achieve, and by receiving help from you, I can help others too.

I came across this article http://www.calmdownmind.com/channel-your-sexual-energy/ 2 weeks ago, and as I said before, I am doing nofap so I can cultivate my sexual energy, I believe that this energy is the key to greatness and it's the force that will accelerate anyone to success in life. I hope that this article will help you to learn how to use this energy the right way.

 

Day 7

Today I accomplished my first goal - I've gone 7 days without PMO, the task wasn't very difficult as I've been very busy with school, My final exams starts next week so I'll be very busy in the upcoming days, hopefully that will keep my mind off of PMO. My next goal is to reach 30 days without relapsing.

 

Day 9
Today I spent all of my time home, the urges are less frequent but they go as easy as they come.
I am amazed how abstaining from PMO for 9 days changed the way I think and look at things, I am more motivated, I procrastinate less in my work and I just want to get up and do Sh*t!

 

Day 13
Every time I decide not to masturbate I would go 7-10 without PMO, but I end up relapsing, giving in for PMO for another month before trying to quit again, I have been fighting PMO for almost 2 years.

This time it's different.

Yesterday I was laying down on my bed, trying to fight against the urge so I can sleep, and as I almost gave up I suddenly remembered why I'm I doing this, I closed my eyes and started to navigate through my past, It was like trying to dive deep into my mind (I hope you understand what I'm saying), I moved between the "images" of every bad thing that happened to me because of this addiction, then I moved through all the successes I had till now, and finally I imagined what I can become if I continue the fight and never give in. Suddenly, the urge vanished and I felt like I already won the battle, perhaps I did!

 

Day 19
I apologize for not posting lately, I've been busy with school work.
I am almost 3 weeks fapfree and I am feeling "good", There is no magic happening these last days but I do notice an improvement on my skin complexion, It's far less oily now and I get less pimples! Wow!
for those who say that MO and acne are not related then you can search and see for yourselves that there are many who stopped getting acne when they quit MO, I will soon be the next living proof lol!

And check out this video, This guy gets the true message that nofap is trying to deliver.

Edit: I had a wet dream 2 days ago, I read from forum that some people get this when they have "extra energy" , But I don't remember having a strong urge the night before.

 

Day 21
I think less about PM nowadays, and I spent the last 2 days studying hard, I have an exam tomorrow!

 

Day 23
Today I had a farewell party with all the senior students in my high school, I haven't seen most of these people in 3 weeks, which is approximately the time since I started Nofap, and I felt that a lot of those people saw something different in me; I flirted a lot more with girls and got a good overall responses from them, some even said that I was "extra-cute"! nothing magical happened but there was a noticeable improvement regarding my behavior around people.

Tomorrow I have another exam, Must Stay Focused!

 

Day 25
There's something that's bothering me today, every time I meet a girl and she acts nice, I spend the rest of my day thinking and fantasizing about her, not in a sexual way, but just imagining what kind of life I'll be living with her, Instead of approaching to girls and just talking with them, I always take a step back and start fantasizing, I know that this won't get me anywhere, but I'd like to hear about your thoughts on this subject? Nofap doesn't cure everything.

 

Thanks for posting Ferdydurke, It's getting a bit lonely in this thread!

In the past 1-2 years I discovered that my acne is related to O because I stopped it for a month and saw HUGE improvements in my complexion, so I experimented with ejaculating and quitting for a certain period of time, here is a summary of my findings:
Day 0
-Skin gets really oily after 1-2 hours of ejaculation.
-Existing pimples gets more irritated and swollen with increasing in its "redness".

Day 1:
- New pimples are visible (about 5-9 including neck), many of them are "underneath the skin" with no white heads and large size.
- Skin still oily.

Day 4-5
-No improvement on existing pimples but there are much less new pimples (3-4).
-On day 4 the skin is not as much as oily as Day 0

Day 7
-Very few pimples appear, only the scarring of old pimples stays with reduced redness.

Day 14 - 30
- Skin is no longer oily.
- Only 1-2 small pimples appear with no redness and irritation.

I repeated this experiment several times over the course of the last year, lasting for 1-5 weeks, and although the numbers I gave you are an estimation, the results were consistent with what I what I'm seeing now in those 26 days, acne is related to ejaculation. I had a wet dream on Day 17 so I experienced an acne breakout at that time, It's sad that I cannot ejaculate without getting acne but I hope that this problem will solve itself in the coming years after I'm done with adolescence.

And about your last point, I can relate to what you're saying about the necessity to take include my personal thoughts when talking to women. I have a male friend that I met him about 7 months ago, he's a good guy but we never truly became friends , now that you've mentioned the need to have a true conversation I remembered that we always talked about a whole bunch of topics without including our personal thoughts, till now I don't even know what he likes and his goals or ambitions. So thanks for the advice, it's an eye opener for me.

 

Day 27
Nothing special happened lately, I'm spending most of my time studying, and I'm kinda nervous about the upcoming tests!

"The temptation to quit will be the greatest just when you're about to succeed."

 

Day 29
Getting some really painful blue balls lately, but I can't wait for tomorrow!