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Heirs' July "Change Yourself" Challenge!

Discussion in 'Self Improvement' started by Knight Solaire, Jul 1, 2016.

  1. Knight Solaire

    Knight Solaire Fapstronaut

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    Hello Heirs, I apologize for this being a little late, but we all have been busy. Welcome to the July challenge, completely devoted to self improvment and making the best out of your self.

    I will hand this off to GL Pyro to break down the challenge.

    July Change Yourself Challenge!

    You can change. A lot of you need to hear that. A lot of people feel like they are running out of options. They have already tried to go on a binge to flush it out of their system, but that didn't work. They tried being positive, but struggled. At this point you probably feel despair. You think that you will never beat PMO and you will never change. You are wrong. YOU CAN BEAT PMO. YOU CAN CHANGE.


    A lot of you are relatively young. Even I am relatively young. But even in my short time on this earth, I have seen myself change. I have gone from a lonely and socially awkward person to someone who has confidence and great friends. I have gone from someone who struggled for years with PMO to someone who has gone almost half a year without PMO and almost a full year without P. I did this with the help of NoFap and the Heirs.


    You want to know how you change? By just changing. It sounds simple enough, but it is not. Change takes time. Don't compare yourself to others, but to yourself. Look at where you were a year ago, two years ago, etc. I used to lack confidence in college, but now I am going to grad school. I used to not care how I looked at all, but now I enjoy dressing up and even get compliments sometimes. It all starts by checking in with yourself. Figuring out what you dislike and what you like. Figure out who you want to be. Then make some simple goals. If you want to be a writer, commit to writing daily for a month. If you want to be more social, then commit to going out once a week. If you want to be better adult (don't we all) commit to making a budget and thinking about your future.


    July's challenge is in two parts


    First, write down on a piece of paper who you are now. What you like, dislike, believe and enjoy. Then write down who you want to be. What you want to change and keep the same.


    Second, write down what you are going to do this month to change. Make a list of somethings you want to do. When we did this before some of mine included writing daily, reading my Bible everyday, and writing my then gf a note everyday. You will post what your goals are so we can keep you accountable. Each week you will report how you did with your goals. The report will be done on a thread each week.


    Sign-Ups start now and will close next Sunday, July 3rd


    Sign Ups
    @PyroFighter
    @Batman_Rising
    @strongman
    @WarriorScarr
    @Knight Solaire
    @NewYearNewMe
    @EquesBritainniae
    @Toshiro
    @Lord of Cinders Gwyn
    @fercho29
    @Nightcrawler15
    @Fjord91
    @Harvey Specter
    @zielnik
    @apotheosis
    @the_grindel
     
    Beingpure, iHappy, JTT and 2 others like this.
  2. The human failure

    The human failure Fapstronaut

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    Well I wrote it on paper. Um what am I supposed to post here?
     
  3. zielnik

    zielnik Fapstronaut

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    What i wrote on a paper:
    1. I'm a man who often succumbs to external influence, against my own beliefs. For example: P, internet, other people instigations. I'm not firm enough.
    2. I'm determined, excited and enthusiastic about the possibility of change, but i tend not to do much about it.
    3. I dream about becoming a neurologist, but i study not enough.

    [​IMG]
    1. I don't want to be a person who is easly influenced by anything or anyone.
    2. I want to use this enthusiasm to actually change myself.
    3. I want to study as much as it is needed.

    SO! My goals for this month are:
    1. I will do something every day to strenghten my sturdiness. For example: i will use internet only for 1h instead of 4, i will not smoke pot with my "friends".
    2. I want to excersise more, so i will do something about that every day of this month.
    3. I will study at least 6h daily for a whole month.

    [​IMG]
     
    Last edited: Jul 2, 2016
  4. What do I like?

    - Horse riding
    - Reading
    - Ancient history
    - Exercise
    - Meditating
    - Cold showers / dousing
    - Gymnastics
    - Piano / guitar / classical music
    - Walking / hiking
    - Being at peace with myself
    - Having a productive day

    What do I dislike?

    - Wasting time
    - Not doing exercise
    - Lack of freedom or choice
    - Edging
    - PMO
    - Letting people down
    - Not living with honour
    - Lying
    - Not getting enough sleep and preventing myself reaching my potential

    What do I believe?

    - That I have a purpose
    - That I have unlimited potential
    - That I’m worthy of success and a girl who will love me for who I am
    - That I do not need to change myself for anyone

    What do I want to change or do?

    - I want to beat this
    - I want to stop edging for good
    - I want to stop trigger searching
    - I want to see girls in a new way, and not simply aesthetically
    - I want to free my mind - to be free of all suffering, as the Buddha put it
    - I want to accept myself, and let go of my past and cease worry over the future
    - I want to become the greatest I can become, whilst not forgetting the Now
    - I want to stop wasting valuable, priceless time
    - I want to stop ‘eyeing’ up girls
    - I want to meditate twice a day
    - I want to reflect at the end of every day
    - I want to post every day on the forums
    - I want to stop slacking and get things done
     
  5. SoulOf1Lion

    SoulOf1Lion Fapstronaut

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    What I like.
    - I like fitness.
    - i like video games.
    - I like comedy movies.
    - I like sitting in front of nature and just think.
    - I like long walks with friends.
    - I like reading self help books.
    - I like being a Muslim.
    - I like animals (with exceptions)

    What I dislike.
    - I don't like insects.
    - I don't like people that are assholes.
    - I don't like seeing people/animals getting hurt (specially animals)

    What I'm going to change.
    - I'm going to meditate for 10 minutes every day.
    -I'm going to get active outdoors for at least 5 minutes everyday.
    - I'm going to exercise 5 times a week.
    - I'm going to eat more and try to gain weight.
    - I'm going to read Quran and other self help books everyday.
    - I'm going to pray at least once a day In the mosque.
    - I'm going to keep the relapses minimum this month if not 00.
     
  6. WarriorScarr

    WarriorScarr Fapstronaut

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    Heirs July Challenge

    Things I like?

    Walking in the park

    Reading

    Sushi

    Traveling

    Good music

    Spending time with family and friends

    Exercise

    Guided Meditations


    What I Dislike?

    When I procrastinate

    Dishonesty

    Rudeness

    Studying

    Working...LOL


    What I believe?

    I believe in God

    Loyalty

    Honesty

    Being a good person

    Giving back to people and paying it forward

    What do I want to be?

    A man free from pornography and living a life free of addiction. I want to be at my best and in control of my emotions.

    What do I want to change in my life?

    Bad eating habits

    Procrastination

    My selfishness I display sometimes


    Things I want to remain the same?

    My positivity

    Things that I will do to this month to change?

    Exercise regularly

    Eat healthier

    Stay PMO free this month

    Be a more loving son to my parents

    Read at least one book by the end of the month

    Cut out sodas for good. Drink water all month long.
     
  7. apotheosis

    apotheosis New Fapstronaut

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    What do I like?
    • Listening to music
    • Reading good fiction
    • Writing
    What do I dislike?
    • Being dishonest with myself / creating faulty rationalizations
    • Negative thoughts
    • Wasting time on mindless activities
    • PMO, PMO, PMO (and all the triggers/activities that lead to it)
    • Bad sleeping habits
    What do I believe?
    • In God
    • I reap what I sow
    • I can transcend my current limitations (although I know they only exist in my mind)
    What do I want to change?
    • Be more mindful of how I spend my time
    • Write (at least) 500 words per day (and finish abandoned writing projects)
    • Read more (at least 20 pages per day)
    • Study everyday for my upcoming GRE
    • Start running everyday (and start eating healthy)
    • To spend more time with family
    • Fix my sleeping routine: wake up earlier
     
  8. The human failure

    The human failure Fapstronaut

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    Oh boy, I guess I'll write out what I put on the paper word for word. It's a lot though.
    What I like about myself (There's not much):
    • I like to think I have good morals
    • I'm good at listening to other people's problems
    • Have never touched any sort of drugs
    What I hate about myself (Here we go):
    • My gender
    • My tendency to procrastinate over everything
    • My constant lack of energy and willpower
    • My inability to get a girlfriend
    • Being a fucking autist all the time
    • Being a failure to my family
    • I'm greedy and tend to hurt others to make me feel better
    • My crippling depression crippling anxiety and crippling loneliness
    • The way I look
    • Jesus fuck I'm lonely, like I'm actively searching up the cost of prostitutes around me lonely
    • I don't learn from my mistakes
    • I don't think ahead about anything
    • I'm too pessimistic
    • I don't want to keep living
    • I'm afraid of other people
    • I'm too self centered
    • I'm an attention whore who covers himself with self pity
    • I never accomplish what I want to
    • I have no purpose in life
    • Why the fuck are the only girls that give me the time of day lesbians, it's not fair
    • I'm a mentally ill fucktard
    What I believe:
    • Honesty and Loyalty are virtues
    • My life is a big joke made by God
    • I'm willing to sacrifice my own happiness for the sake of others
    • Time may heal some wounds, but others will only get worse
    What I enjoy:
    • Nothing. I don't feel joy anymore, or anything besides the aching loneliness that gnaws at me every waking moment.
    What to change:
    • Exercise daily I guess
    • Try not to procrastinate
    • Go to bed on time
    • Keep doing Nofap, even though it's not working so far
     
  9. the_grindel

    the_grindel Fapstronaut

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    Alright! I'm a little pressed for time, so I will only be writing down my goals for the month.

    You see, I'm generally pretty good at not doing things... The problem comes when I have to replace that time with doing things.
    Basically the biggest thing I want to focus on changing this month is my lack of discipline.
    The way to do that is by creating several small habits and sticking to them. Some are already partially established, some need a lot of work. Here they are!

    Every night I will write in my personal journal (already do this, but I miss a night here and there)
    Every day I will do 100 pushups, situps, and squats to establish a habit of exercise
    Every day I'll carry a mini journal in my pocket since my thoughts tend to slip away from me
    Every day I'll follow an intermittent fasting protocol (usually do this already)
    Every day I will wake up at 5 AM (this happens already during the week for work)
    Every night before going to sleep, I will create a to-do list for the next day

    It's kind of a lot, but as I said some of these are already established. All I need to do is solidify them.

    Looking forward to this month!
     
  10. PyroFighter

    PyroFighter Fapstronaut

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    Thanks to all who posted their thoughts on here! From now on, this thread will be used to post how you are doing each week with the goals you posted for yourself.

    My goals are:

    Read my Bible daily
    Write everyday
    Only go on Facebook once a day on my phone and computer
    Go without my phone once a day
    Do at least 20 pushups a day
    Spend time with my family at least once a week if possible
    Plan out my week in advance so that I get one productive thing done a day
    Figure out grad school details by the end of the month
    Have a budget for the next 6 months by the end of the month
    Reflect/pray everyday for at least 15 minutes
    Go without my phone 30 minutes before I go to bed and 30 minutes after I wake up

    The way the posting will work is you will tell me how well you followed your goals every week. If you followed all of them all of the time say 10/10. If you missed a few goals on one or two days estimate it out and say like 8/10. So on and so forth.
     
  11. Pressed for time like @the_grindel so I gotta cut the shit and get right to the chase for my own situation. Sorry if it seems abstruse. Will post details of how I am doing weekly. Will share more later today before it turns to 7/7 in my part of the globe :)

    Goals for the month:

    REMAIN STEADFAST ON THE WARPATH OR DIE.



    DO NOT SLACK OFF IN SELF CULTIVATION PRACTICE INCLUDING BOWING, MANTRA RECITATION, AND LECTURES BY A DHARMA MASTER.



    "Composure"

    Shake it off
    Pick yourself up, they say
    Your life fell apart in your hands
    And you've got the scars
    To prove it
    It's not the first time, and they're getting
    Deeper

    Pull it together
    Button up your shirt
    Roll down those sleeves
    Don't let them see how you've coped

    It's not the first time, and they're getting
    Deeper

    More and more your demeanor looks like quicksand
    More and more your demeanor looks like
    Quicksand!

    It seems like you're giving up
    Giving up on everything you worked for
    It seems like you're giving up
    Giving up on everything you worked for

    It's pulling you under
    It's gripping around your throat
    It's pulling you under
    It's gripping around your throat

    It seems like you're giving up on everything
    It seems like you're giving up on everything

    It's pulling you under
    It's pulling you under

    Life can be
    Overwhelming
    But don't turn your back on
    The strongest crutch
    You've ever had (you've ever had)

    They have always been there to
    Brace your fall

    Wave goodbye to the past
    You've got your whole life to lead
    Wave goodbye to the past
    You've got your whole life to lead
    Wave goodbye to the past
    You've got your whole life to lead
    Wave goodbye to the past

    You've got your whole life to lead
    You've got your whole life to lead
    You've got your whole life to lead

    It's time to gain some ground!
     
    WarriorScarr likes this.
  12. Ok. This is going to be simple and short.

    I like the innate potential to be a great human being I feel I was born with, I dislike that I have fallen into vice for so many years and had such a big ego I denied help offered to me from people who really cared about me thinking I could solve my own problems, and I believe that I can and will change into a man whom does not lust at and objectify women or my own body. I want to pursue all my goals to the fullest and relinquish the selfish desires for power, wealth, sex, and fame. If I end up getting married or striking it rich, it will be because I was pursuing a deeper purpose in life to help others and those things are just karma that I reap in this life from deeds sown long ago. I will no longer seek things other than becoming a whole human being from the inside out.

    My goals for this week are to finish reading Terry Crews' Manhood and to continue my fitness regimen and try to get the training done right after meditation and breakfast in the morning before I leave the house. That's it, just getting out in the backyard each morning to train every single day.
     
  13. J_s3ph

    J_s3ph Fapstronaut

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    What I like
    - Listening to, creating, and analyzing music
    - Analyzing in general
    - Piano
    - Talking with a close few
    - Helping people out

    What I dislike
    - Repeating the same mistakes
    - My laziness
    - Lack of motivation
    - Getting distracted
    - PMO

    What I believe
    - I have a ridiculous ton of potential
    - PMO has stopped me from reaching my peak for too long
    - That everyone has a calling for something
    - God is real
    - If I don't fix this addiction soon, I'm going to have A LOT of trouble in the future

    What I need to change
    - YouTube and Twitch browsing
    - Sleep schedule; wake up early, sleep early.
    - Eating habits
    - Water intake
    - Amount of piano practice [1 hour or more a day]
     
  14. I like reading, studying and preparing my classes for this month
    I enjoy speaking in public and teaching
    I enjoy my family
    I love going to the beach with a good book
    I enjoy doing Tai Chi on the beach wile the sun sets
    I enjoy working in new projects that get me excited and motivated

    I hate myself when I get an urge because I " shut down"
    I hate when I do not tolerate listening to my wife any longer
    I hate when I get depressed by problems that I think I cannot overcome
    I hate not having more time for leisure

    I will keep working this month in avoiding getting depressed, life is short and has too many good things, I cannot keep thinking that the glass is half empty instead of half full
    I need to plan my next few years in my work, because I am in a transitional phase
    I will keep using every energy to stay clean, after 14 months of PMO free I cannot afford a stupid relapse just because I he horny for someone I see in the street
    I will keep working in avoid fantasizing and creating delusional porn stories inside my head
    Keep on fighting
    Fercho
     
  15. Checking in with my goals. Going well, I procrastinated yesterday with training before leaving the house, but trained in the evening. Trained wonderfully this morning. Almost finished with Manhood, about 70 pages left. Will finish this weekend. Then starting this book:
    The Navy SEAL Art of War: Leadership Lessons from the World's Most Elite Fighting Force

    Need to vent. I can't stay here for the long haul yall. It's not helpful for me I'm going to be perfectly honest, without this group and @SolidSoldier's teachings as a guide for myself personally in recovery, I have no purpose for being here I came to realize. Having this group is a blessing and I will carve my name into the entire forum rather than just quitting. I love all you Heirs, I also love all the fapstronauts and femstronauts reaching for the sun in their own ways even if this group does not appeal to them :)



    I'll carve my own name into the earth
    I'll carve my own name into the earth

    Don't tell me how to think
    Don't tell me how to live my life
    I make my own decisions
    And I'll pay the ultimate price

    A collection of memories
    How I could I ever forget
    This is a journey of lessons
    From my birth to my death

    A path of opposites and all the choices in-between
    I'm running scared through this poetic tragic movie scene
    The days turn into weeks, months then turn into years
    We'll stand the test of time, our hope will persevere.

    I roam across the land
    I wish to seek and understand
    The truth about life and about whom I really am
    My blood is still young and karmas knocking at my door
    Its time to stand up this is my life I'm fighting for

    Its time to set the record straight
    No more excuses, no more complaints
    Leave everything behind get up and live your dream
    Don't let it fade away
    We are all born to be free
    Fuck who you want me to be
    Born to be free

    A path of opposites and all the choices that come between
    I'm running scared through this poetic tragic movie scene
    Days turn into weeks, months then turn into years
    We'll stand the test of time, Our hope will persevere.

    I roam across the land
    I wish to seek an understand
    The truth about life and about whom I really am
    My blood is still young and karmas knocking at my door
    Its time to stand up this is my life I'm fighting for
    I roam across the land
    I wish to seek an understand
    The truth about life and about whom I really am
    My blood is still young and karmas knocking at my door
    Its time to stand up this is our lives we're fighting for
    This is the life we're fighting for
    This is the life we're fighting for

    May we keep striding forward with positivity and hope brothers and sisters.
     
    Last edited: Jul 9, 2016
    fercho29 and SolidSoldier like this.
  16. zielnik

    zielnik Fapstronaut

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    Ok. My first report. It's going to be short because i'm busy. Fuck yea.
    My goals for each day of this month were:
    1. I will do something every day to strenghten my sturdiness. For example: i will use internet only for 1h instead of 4, i will not smoke pot with my "friends".
    2. I want to excersise more, so i will do something about that every day of this month.
    3. I will study at least 6h daily for a whole month.


    I honestly can say that number one is going great, i'm not using internet almost at all. I make a list throughout the day of things that i need to check in web, and when i'm not alone at home i check them. Whether it's study stuff or something stupid i try to do it quickly. I have not skip a day.
    Excersising is going slow. But when i'm not lifting planes i just try to go for a walk or a run. It's satisfying.
    And finally studying. I don't track time but i can say without a doubt that i do more than 6h, so yeah.
    Till now july is going great
    .

    [​IMG]
     
  17. SoulOf1Lion

    SoulOf1Lion Fapstronaut

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    Update #1:
    First thing first I'm sorry for the delay of this post, things haven't been well for me during this week. I already relapsed twice with binging.
    I haven't been meditating, I meditated twice.
    I have been exercising.
    I missed a couple of prayers in the mosque.
    I haven't read a single letter from the Quran.

    That's about to change though.
     

  18. Sometimes we gotta get out and try out life on our own again. Eventually it is something we all must do. We get in, get better and get on with life. Some of us come back to help others, some don't have too. One thing is for sure, none of us need to stay in long. If we do then there is a bigger problem that the internet group isn't fixing.
     
  19. That's ok @Toshiro . Some Fapstronauts fund better at some point of their reboot not to come back because they want to separate themselves from their past addiction
    Some others we find useful to stay connected because it helps us stay accountable and not to forget the shitty life we got before
    In my case it helps me a lot to help other fellow Fapstronauts , it is a way to get back to the community and feel useful
    I am coming back not so
    Many times per day as one year ago but try at least 5 times per week
    Good luck in your new life, you deserve it
    Fercho
     

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