23 years old and still a virgin

Honestly I can't think of any other way of you losing your virginity than paying for it or getting the balls to go out and experiment in rejection and hopefully find a girl who's down to f***.

Maybe you're approaching the whole idea of talking to girls wrong. You treat them like they're above you in some regard and don't see them as normal human beings. Just go to a bar, get some liquid courage in you and go from there if when you're sober you're too scared

 

My whole life I have been horrendous when it comes to attracting women. I lost motivation in all other aspects of my life.
It's the fact that it makes me feel undesirable and leads me to believe I have this fundamental flaw that renders me undatable.
I've been making changes. I got a nice haircut, I go to the gym and have built a decent amount of muscle, I'm not overweight by any means, I've changed my wardrobe around.

Dude, I feel you. I'm 28 and STILL haven't gone on a single date with a girl Let alone kissed one. I feel the same way as you in regards to low self esteem. Like you I too place women on a pedestal and feel unworthy of talking to them. Honestly my only suggestion to u would be to begin the nofap journey if you haven't done so and with time your confidence will skyrocket through the roof. Stay strong.

 

28 year old virgin here. I understand where you're coming from, believe me. I went on absolutely 0 dates all throughout high school and college. In desperation I finally went the online route just to at least get some dating experience. I'll say that it worked. I went on a few dates, but none of the girls I went on dates with from there were the ones for me. When I was 26, I finally met my future fiancée at a mutual friend's birthday party. Don't ask me how it happened or what I did. All I know is that it wasn't forced and I wasn't looking for anything that night. Here's the thing: You are not special. I don't mean to be rude! I actually mean that in a positive and empowering way. Join the ranks of thousands before you and thousands that will come after you in the exact same situation. Do you think most of these people die lonely and pathetic? Heck no, at some time or another most people will find their partner, look back, and wonder why they tortured and hated themselves for all those years. I'm one of them. You are young, my friend! Enjoy your youth! Make friendships. Be kind, generous, respectable, and confident and you will attract many people. Own your virginity and don't let anyone or anything make you feel bad about yourself. You are NOT undateable. I repeat, you are NOT undateable. You just don't have a crystal ball to see into your future and therefore can't feel comforted that in all likelihood you will find someone. And why am I 28 with a fiancée and still a virgin you might ask? Surely, I must be insane after waiting all this time! Well, the fact is that we value waiting until marriage before having sex, for reasons I won't necessarily get into right now. I'm not saying you have to believe in it, (although I do think there are a lot of valid reasons to) but I'm just trying to say that it's not all there is! Cheers.

 

You've seen there are 28 year old virgins and I'm a 31 year old virgin so don't worry about your age. Since I never had a girlfriend I can't give out relationship or dating advice but what I can say is that a) this should not be the reason for low self-esteem and b) you should not worry and try too hard. Relax and focus on other areas of your life!

 

Then all I can tell you is that you should first build up your confidence and self-esteem, but do it for yourself so that you can get better and then the girls will come along

 

Almost 26 and still a virgin and never really been in a relationship that lasted more than a few dates.
Don't worry too much, invest in yourself and find more hobbies and explore other areas you can meet and socialize with other people - ask your friends if they know someone they can recommend to you, take some dance lessons/yoga class/get a dog and walk it/involve in yourself in more social activities.

Try the online dating stuff too, i know several people that have gotten married from that - so its obviously not a compete failure.

But overall, focus on yourself and your personality and empowering your own mind and being happy, don't be stressed about not being in a relationship.. I say this because for the past few months i've felt so horrible that i just dont make the time to even try to interact much outside work/working out/home.. Invest in you dude, it will come on its own hopefully.. Supposedly. Eventually we might just meet another person our age/traits that is also a virgin and not someone that's been you know.. around a lot.

 

Congrats bro on deciding to fight against the evil plague that has been destroying not only our lives, but our loved ones aswell. Stay strong. I wish you the best of luck on your journey.

 

Well, you could be like me and have had sexual encounters that can be counted on one hand (and I'm 45). I'm not overweight or considered unattractive (I'm average looking, I guess), but I just could never relate to people all that well. It could have something to do with the fact I'm considered very intelligent, and intelligent people tend to see the world for just how corrupt and awful it can be. This is not considered a characteristic that is attractive to the masses. People tend to go for superficiality. Perhaps you are of the same serious mindset and people sense it. I know they do with me, but so be it. I am who I am.

 

You sound a bit too negative and cynical here, but I think you're right that there's often a negative correlation between intelligence and sexuality. The more intelligent you are the more likely you have things on your mind other than sex and also you tend to overthink every relationship and its implications instead of just following your instincts to have sex.

 

Call me negative and cynical if you like. I've heard it all before.

 

Check this out guys:

 

Not a bad video. There is some great advice about being upfront about your intentions. Women aren't mind readers, so being confident and decisive are going to help. I would say though that the friendzone is only a dead end if you allow it to be. Sometimes the friendzone can be the best thing that's happened to you especially when you do not care about such titles as "the friendzone" and when you genuinely care about her happiness.

I'm with my best friend now and she told me she would measure guys up by how I would treat her and the level of communication we have with each other. A communication which we would have never had, had I not been her friend first. By being her friend she opened up to me in ways she wouldn't with anyone else. I'm the person she can and wants to share everything with and one day she said this is what made her realize that I'm her soulmate. Has it been an easy process? No. But it's been worth it! We both want to spend the rest of our lives with each other and that is what we're both working towards.

 

21 year old virgin here, honestly there's nothing wrong with being a virgin. It took me a while to realize that. Personally waiting for marriage. As corny as this sounds I want my first time to be with someone special

 

Despite what most seem to think, losing your virginity is not a hallmark of manhood or personal growth.

Actually, I'd say being a virgin (especially in an overly sexed-up culture) is a positive quality.

However, feeling down about yourself and believing you are un-dateable is unfortunate. Being a PMO addict can make it seem like the negative consequences of PMO are part of your innate identity, but this is not the case. There is nothing-nothing-about you that is innately un-dateable. If you give it enough time free of PMO, you will probably start to attract more attention from women than you know what to do with.

PMO drains your real essence. When you stop squandering your inner essence on this habit, you allow your real self to shine through. And it is your real self that is attractive to date. PMO is the problem.

 

I hear many things. Things about how to lose your virginity. But at the young age of 16, I know this. You will find a girl when you stop looking.

 

Thanks for sharing this video! I think she is absolutely right, but being upfront with one's intentions does not come easy to everyone.