Gender Identity

there was some time when i had identity issues. talking with a real life friend helped me. its tough to find someone who's non judgmental about it. but talking n letting it out does help.

be indifferent to it. like eating healthy food...there are other sources of happiness than identity of an alpha male. like joking with friends, eating a healthy meal.
also no pmo. that has been helpful.

but mainly talking has been helpful. the friend didnt give any solutions but when i talked of my problems, n he talked of his problems(his problems werent identity or sexual problems)...it was healing. like some burden was off my shoulder.

 

Pornography can sometimes warp your sexuality to the point where you may think you are homosexual. My advice to you is to table questions of homosexuality for now until you are completely rebooted. If, after your reboot you find that you still have these feelings for men, your homosexuality might be innate. If not, then it was likely porn-induced.

 

Kriss could well be porn. I have viewed porn with several guys through the years and masterbated in circle jerks. Porn drives you to seek higher levels of stimulation to get that ultimate release with orgasm. Men think alike and find a camaraderie in that especially with porn. Have alot of same desires many married with wives with same problems there as well

 

I feel the same way, except I don't generally find too many really intelligent people of either gender. I'm a member of Mensa, so my IQ is high, but I'm just looking for discussions that expand beyond the parameters of TV and the latest pop-culture silliness. Is that too much to ask?

 

I've never really struggled much with gender identity, but I have dealt with some ocd issues, which may be a huge part of what you're dealing with. You have a suspicion that you may be attracted to men, which leads you to obsess over whether or not you are, which causes you to always associate other men with attraction. In this way, you may be creating the very thing that is causing you so much stress. Ideally, you will be able to just ignore such thoughts until they disappear, but that is easier said than done. Instead, focus on rebooting, and when the question comes up, work on coming to terms with it. Being attracted to other guys does not make you any less of a man, and neither does feeling more like a woman than a man. There are moral, and other, issues to be considered, of course. And I would discourage you from engaging in any same sex relationships. However, it is never wrong to feel a certain way. It's important to remember that. In the meantime, try some exercise. Running is popular for many people, weightlifting or body weight exercises are other great starter workouts. Just make sure your form is good, so you don't damage yourself.
Additionally, there are intellectual men out there, and many of them are hidden among those of us who are simpler. They just look and act less intelligent because they have been conditioned to, and they want to fit in. These majestic creatures can be found in their natural habitat of book clubs, debate clubs, and related gatherings.

 

I don't think I have a problem with my gender identity, I'm a man, and I want to be a man, get married and have children with a woman.
But I haven't EVER felt sexually attracted by a woman. On the other hand, men really attract me. But I don't want to satisfy that urge.
I'm 21 yo and I've never dated. I kissed a girl in High School, it was alright, but I didn't feel anything awesome, neither had a boner.
I'm a Christian, and I believe that God has a plan for me to live my life to the full, no matter my struggles.
I just started reading some stuff about this situation, written by people who want to help you overcome this feeling, not surrender to it.
I don't think I'm in a disguise, or I'm deceiving people around me.

We can overcome it.

 

Kriss, you hate these thoughts, right? This is called HOCD/SOCD (Homosexual OCD) The fear of being gay. I have HOCD and basically it is a type of OCD that causes one to have intrusive homosexual thoughts. People suffering from HOCD aren't attracted the same sex, but their mind makes them think that they are. Even if you don't get aroused by the homosexual thought, you still overanalyse this thought and start questioning if you are gay. In reality, people suffering from HOCD are not gay. People suffering from this have been straight throughout their whole life.

If you do not get aroused by these thoughts or the same sex, you are not gay.
If you get aroused by the opposite sex, you are not gay.

If you get these thoughts throughout the day, just tell yourself that is just HOCD playing tricks on you again, take a deep breath and tell yourself you are not gay.