30 DAYS!!! I feel really good

30 DAYS!!! I feel really good

So I´m at the 30 day mark again!!! I feel really good, really good....
I had already been at the 30-day mark, i think twice, when I started my NF-journey. The difference now is that I´m more realistic now. I know that by stopping PMO you don´t solve all your problems. By stopping it you are making a step forward, you can think about yourself because you mind becomes clearer. It is the beginning of a life-long journey of being your best, of getting to find out why you are addicted, what issues do you have and to do something about it.

I´ve never reached 90 days, so that´s a must for me now.
I just want to write some words about what helped me, some realizations. About the basic stuff (P-blockers, avoiding triggers, working out, rebooting log) I´ve already written a post and there is a lot of information in the forums.

Realizing that life is life...

Life isn´t just fun,
it´s absolutely not as it is presented on our screens (most of the times)
it isn´t as it looks like in P
it isn´t just as it looks like on FB, twitter, instagram, youtube, etc.
there aren´t just hot girls who crave for sex with just you.

Life can be very hard sometimes. If you want to achieve things there will be hard days where you have to sacrifice.
If you feel down, you have to embrace it. Pain is painful, if you numb yourself with PMO or some other drug everytime you feel some discomfort you will become a ZOMBIE!!! A FEELINGLESS ZOMBIE.
After pain there is joy. I think that´s why, in the past, I couldn´t show my emotions, because I blurred them with PMO. I neither felt much pain, nor did I feel much joy.

Sex is 1 million times better than PMO.
Sex isn´t like Sex in the p-movies.
Most of the "cool" people in the social media have big mental issues, there life isn´t what it appears to be as you see their "cool" pics.
Girls are human beings, girls have their issues, girls want to have fun sometimes, sometimes not, they are different than men. Most of them don´t find you hot, and don´t want to have sex with you. Most of them in realitiy don´t look like what they look on FB, twitter, instagram, youtube and especially not what they pretend in P. Although P does alot to distort the image of women. Some women follow this image.
Girls aren´t just a piece of ass or boobs.
Spending time with a girl doesn´t mean that you will or that you have to have sex.

P is evil... I think most of the women and maybe men in that industry don´t really like what they do. Actually I´ve found a cool site with some disgusting facts about P: "https://www.shelleylubben.com". It opened my eyes.
A lot of actors have huge mental issues and alot of them are drug addicts.
I knew that sex in P is agressive and often brutal, and i thought that the female actors like that. Well, I was really stupid. Of course people have their fetishes, but to some extent. We all know that P deviates your preferences. Me, e.g. I found anal-sex always hot on screen. Well in reality it can be, but it isn´t always that hot.
Also, P changes or shows an image of sex, that people think is normal. So men and women think sex should look like that in reality.

I don´t like P anymore, I HATE IT. I thought reality can be like what we see on screen.
But reality is much more complex and much better. There is joy and there is pain. There are hot girls and there are fat and ugly girls. There is adventure and there is boredom. There are times of sacrifice and times of reaping the fruits of your labour. There are periods of having sex and periods of not having sex at all.

That´s all fine, that´s life. And that is beautiful!!!!

 

Thank you @badeae1 !! The 90 days is just a motivation for me to stick to my decision and to my believings. I hate P and PMO and I want to eliminate it from my life. But you are right 90 days is just arbitrary. I just don´t want to PMO never again.
Stay clean too!!!

 

Thank you @Phoenix11 ! Yes life is rich and complex and much better than what we see on our screens when watching P and dulling our feelings and emotions.

Stay strong!!!

 

Thank you @Quints !!I do my best and I hope you do too!!!