Pitfalls of Self Development

I know exactly what you mean about over indulging in self development media without taking action. I can't remember where I read this but I remember reading about people who constantly fantasize about their goals get a sort of 'high' of the fantasy which they become addicted to. The problem with focusing to much on the end result is that you can wind up feeling temporarily satisfied with the fantasy and not taking any of the necessarily steps to achieving the goal. I think a lot of people (myself included) fall into this trap.

I suppose as you said the trick is to just start making steps in the right direction without over-planning too much.

 

Lol I thought self-help books were always regarded as lame. I would however disagree with videos. especially on Youtube - their are people out there who give genuine good advice and don't only use their channels to make money.

 

I can so relate to being addicted to self development without applying any of that. Been there, done that. As for as many books telling same stuff in different ways, I think it can be a good thing. It's useful to hear same things in different words and see them for different perspective. Helps to remember, learn and understand better. Plus many people preaching the same thing can cover more ground than just one person preaching that thing and so help more people to improve their lives.

 

I thought this was going to be some BS but upon reading, I agree. The reason why I'm addicted to self improvement is because I didn't need "the usual" to get me started. No book, blog or video created the spark; I created the spark. I also avoid "self improvement" media (note the quotes) because, like others have said, they're selling feelings. Nothing but a sycophantic circle jerk of delusional do-nothings who get caught up in the reward, but not the grind. They show you the bright, sunny sky, but not the long trudge in the trenches, overcast sky and tunnels with rain beating down on you every second in the form of life's challenges. I also don't go around telling people my plans until I'm legit doing them or am literally two seconds away from getting started. I feel that slight mania when my lightbulb goes off and I get a new goal to add to my list, but I'm always sure to check it. Like with nofap. I didn't run around bragging about it and I still don't. I don't mention that I abstain from porn and masturbation unless it comes up. That way, the focus stays on ME to make things happen and doesn't change the dialogue from self improvement to how "weird" it is to abstain from PMO.

As far as books and media? They all say the same thing. I don't like their ethereal, complicated way of speaking, and how they use vague language to get the point(s) across.

 

I watch motivational videos on YouTube by Les Brown and Jim Rohn. I've found them to be helpful, but I also don't listen to them every day. Heck if I ate chocolate every day for 8 months I'm sure I would get sick of it too!

 

Bob Proctor. I've not followed him long, but he's onto some brilliant ideas.

 

You're not being cynical.You're realist. I suffer from the same problem too.I'm on my longest streak so far and the I'm having troubles with filling the empty room in my life that has appeared afrer giving up PMO completely for nearly 20 days now.I'm more of a thinker rather tham a doer.Any suggestions would be deeply appreciated.

 

I almost read a book recently called "Essentialism." The idea behind it is that the most successful and purpose-driven people are those that only focus on the essentials (mostly). Turns out, a good portion of the book is basically non-essential filler; how's that for irony? So instead of buying the hypocritical book, I found a great site with quite a few "self-help" type book summaries; no fluff, just the essentials. I've found them to be really helpful in that I can quickly get the essence and idea of a book, figure out how to apply it in my situation, and immediately start to implement it in my day-to-day.

Here's the link if anyone's interested: https://paulminors.com/resources/book-summaries/