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Does PMO addiction make one less interested and inclined to enjoy reading?

Discussion in 'Porn Addiction' started by TheLearner2008, Jun 2, 2014.

  1. TheLearner2008

    TheLearner2008 Fapstronaut

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    I have always wanted to read more and always get bored when I start reading a book and now that I discovered my problem 10 days ago I am wondering does PMO addiction cause problems in this regard. Ie would it make me less inclined engaged and able to enjoy reading?
     
  2. Alexander_D

    Alexander_D Fapstronaut

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    Depends. Being free from the pmo cycle and the need for the dopamine hit can potentially free you to pursue any number of productive things.

    However we usually dont become porn addicts without reason. More often than not, there's an underlying problem in our lives that we dont know how to deal with, so we self-medicate with an addiction - something that takes enormous amounts of time, we 'lose ourselves' in it and forget all our real issues during it.

    Being free from porn is undoubtedly a really good thing, but whether your life takes off afterwards or not depends on whether you can address those underlying issues and resist replacing one addictive activity with another (sex, social media, tv, alcohol, drugs, even extreme exercise).

    If there are underlying issues that have led you to porn addiction, and you dont address them (grief, anger, depression, rejection etc), then it's a pretty safe bet that you'll just find another way of blanking out, even if it is less harmful. And you'll still find it hard to be patient with a book.
     
  3. TheLearner2008

    TheLearner2008 Fapstronaut

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    How do we figure out what the underlying issue is? Is there always an underlying issue?
     
  4. Alexander_D

    Alexander_D Fapstronaut

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    Stick with the challenge and take note of the times you feel really tempted; what really triggered it? What are you running away from? A common answer might be not having a gf; porn does nothing to get you a gf (actually the opposite), but you might find that in giving up p, you just become, eg, a video game addict to deal with the lonliness and dissappointment of not having a gf.

    I mean, the underlying issue might be something as simple as that. It's not necessarily sinister like a mental health issue. But you'll never know if you dont confront the pain that leads to addiction; take it head on, grab it and make it squeal some answers. Dont be afraid.
     
  5. DaBoy

    DaBoy Fapstronaut

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    I believe that it does. I stopped PMO and then finished a book in two days. Never could have done it before.
     
  6. TheLearner2008

    TheLearner2008 Fapstronaut

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    That's great thanks guys. I am hoping I become really into reading.

    The thing is when I had a loving partner I was still addicted however my addiction to PMO started long before I had that long term relationship.

    So possibly it just continued into and during my relationship?
     
  7. TheLearner2008

    TheLearner2008 Fapstronaut

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    I have ways PMO'ed in the mornings before work and I have always been unhappy at work. Could this be the reason? I am trying to run away from work?

    The problem is I have been to several jobs albeit the same field and it's been the same so I thought maybe it was the other way around and that the PMO was causing my unhappiness at work.
     
  8. Breaking Fap

    Breaking Fap Fapstronaut

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    You said the thing with the girlfriend is a common underlying reason. At first view I would say yes, because I never had a girlfriend, I can not imagine to "have" one (This "have" is really a uncomfortable word). This is something unimaginable for me, and I'm not talking about attractiveness, it's my mindset that just can not assimilate to this imagination... You know? I am Fapstronaut.

    But I dont like this idea of dependence. Why should I be intrinsically dependend of something or someone? I believe I am dependend, but this is a uncomfortable disharmonic thought, therefore not true.

    So if you think the underlying reason is the fact, that you need a girlfriend, I would argue, that there is an even deeper reason, namely that you believe that you are dependend of having a girlfriend or someone similar, to fill a gap of satisfaction.

    A lot of people are lonely, and are happy with that. Of cource they don't reject having a partner and are open minded, but they are not dependend.
     
  9. Alexander_D

    Alexander_D Fapstronaut

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    Sure, maybe youre unfulfilled with your job and need to find a real passion that you can work at? You sense that there's more to life, but youre not getting it? Keep digging. Start a brief journal maybe. Confronting the pain of temptation always gives answers.

    But porn is just an opiate. It will always obscure the problems for you and keep you in a rut. In fighting the porn, youll see the problem and then be able to build a solution. But dont forget to ask for help! Dont be a hero! Porn feeds an isolated side of us that refuses to ask for help and tried to sort everything out alone (usually, with more porn!) But take it from me, suffering in silence is a road to no where. When you go out on a limb with someone, make yourself vulnerable and ask for advice/help, it's scary and can result in rejection, but it's really the only way to grow.

    @breaking fap: you may be right for some people, but I think for most, the obvious path for growth, maturity and happiness is in starting a family, with all the love, work and sacrifice that it involves. While we're young, we should at least be open to meeting the right girl. But until we're free from porn, we're basically blind to real love and beauty. So bin the porn and wait and see.
     
  10. TakeAMinute

    TakeAMinute Fapstronaut

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    I draw on my own experiences - I had a PMO problem from before 12, to just a couple days ago. I was homeschooled & required to read quite a few books. However I also enjoyed reading books on my own. Sometimes I used books to satisfy an urge to do SOMETHING instead of porn, but I also enjoyed the book. In the past couple years, I've basically stopped reading - and I engaged in the exact same PMO cycle as before. Books that had been interesting to me, no longer were.

    I got an iPhone that made possible the familiar night-fap instead of just masturbation every night which had an effect on how much reading I did.

    I will let you guys know whether or not my reading picks back up - I think there is some connection.
     
  11. TheLearner2008

    TheLearner2008 Fapstronaut

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    Thanks for this. I feel as though because I have been addicted to high speed P since I was 12 I probably never developed that book-worm mentality so I think I should just wait and see. I am just so excited to see what areas of my life change for the better. I am not expecting a new person but just a few positive changes will make the world of difference for me!
     
  12. TheLearner2008

    TheLearner2008 Fapstronaut

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    I so agree with this. Mark Quippet also said something that was a total light bulb moment for me which I am actually going to post about. He said that PMO makes you need immediate gratification so you are not willing to do anything that requires effort or discomfort, instead you just give up.

    That is so relevant to me at work - I never want to do anything that requires pain because I want that immediate gratification e.g. that piece of work is done, or well done that report was good or well done that presentation was good so I never produce anything deep or valuable!

    http://www.spreecast.com/events/n366-days-of-nofap-qa
     
  13. Breaking Fap

    Breaking Fap Fapstronaut

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    As long as we (or especially me) don't clarify this false believe of dependence, there is no chance of getting into a relationship without creating conflictual situations.
    So not only bin the porn, but look at underlying mould.
     
  14. Ronin

    Ronin Fapstronaut

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    I don't think it has anything to do with reading in particular, but it certainly affects your energy levels. When you fap, it's almost as shooting up your favourite drug - it relaxes you, but in the same times it drains you. Also an interesting new study linked masturbation to lack of grey matter in certain parts of the brain - particularly the one responsible for motivation.
    So technically it affects you in everything depending on the degree of severity of your addiction.
     
  15. TheLearner2008

    TheLearner2008 Fapstronaut

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    I can totally relate to that. I mean I know professional athletes don't ejaculate before major games because of this reason.

    I would say that during my up days I definitely have more energy!

    The great thing is as time passes all these answers will become clearer
     

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