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Healthy vs Unhealthy masturbating?

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by Rohanrecovery, Feb 2, 2017.

  1. Rohanrecovery

    Rohanrecovery Fapstronaut

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    I am on day 23 of recovery now.

    Initially it was just no porn, but then I realized when I masturbated, it was giving me the same addictive hit, and resulting come down, of porn.

    However, in the last couple of days, I've started to see women differently. Definitely, there's a slight change. A lot less objectifying thoughts.

    I had in interaction with a girl yesterday who worked at a restaurant. Was pleasant and a level of affection between us.

    This morning I masturbated to her. But the fantasy wasn't an objectifying one. It was fantasizing about healthy, normal sex with her, where her satisfaction was as important as mine.

    To be honest, at the very end, I thought of an unhealthy porn scene in my head to climax. But that was only like 10 seconds. Clearly, I have to keep getting those unhealthy thoughts out, through recovery.

    I wanted to know if there are people who see some types of thoughts during masturbation as okay. I'm beginning to think there is unhealthy fantasy and healthy fantasy. (Maybe this doesn't apply to everyone)
     
    Ol' What's-His-Face likes this.
  2. LucidBMX

    LucidBMX Fapstronaut

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    Gotta go Hardmode bro.
     
  3. Rohanrecovery

    Rohanrecovery Fapstronaut

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    Having said that, now a couple of hours after masturbating, I don't feel great. I feel that slight loss of control on my mind, and that lack of ability to concentrate at the moment.

    It's Damn tough!
     
  4. MichaelJ

    MichaelJ Guest

    Healthy masturbating is called sex. I think once you cum after wanking, your body realises you're all alone or something and that makes it worse than real sex where you can physically see, smell and feel your partner after having an O. If nature intended for us to fap, our semen would turn into babies on its own when it hit the ground, don't ya think? Sure, it's pleasurable alright, but the real purpose of sex naturally was procreation and pleasure I guess was something to make you want to do it more. So while I think playing with it is natural, climaxing on your own is not. Thing is how many of us can just play without wanting to O?

    Fapping is just your brain/dopamine system telling you it's pleasurable to do it, so you love pleasure and feel like you have to. But unlike sex it messes your life source, karma, hormones, libido, adrenals or whatever you think/feel/believe it does. But it certainly does messes things or else I don't think NoFap would be a thing.

    I don't think it's a coincidence that the more authorities promote masturbating as a healthy thing, the more unhappy/depressed men there are. In the past when it was considered a sin or/and some people were ignorant/unimformed enought to not do it because they didn't know they can males were more virile. Also, abstination (sp?) was/is considered godly by almost all religions and old societies. I don't think it's just our food and environment, really. Porn and overly sexual imagery was not that big before, now it's everywhere. I feel like chemically castrated when I overindulge in fapping. And I cannot do it in moderation, as I'm an all or nothing person.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Feb 2, 2017
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  5. Rohanrecovery

    Rohanrecovery Fapstronaut

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    Thanks for the replies, will read in more detail later.

    Just to leave an update, I think you're right. I feel like shit now a few hours later. It could be because I masturbated to porn yesterday, but I think it's because of masturbating this morning also.

    Problem is I find it so fucking hard to go more than 2 days without masturbation.

    I feel like shit now and unable to concentrate.

    Literally also getting physical withdrawals, feeling nauseous etc.
     
    Last edited: Feb 2, 2017
  6. Ol' What's-His-Face

    Ol' What's-His-Face Fapstronaut

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    I think masturbation can be fine, like, in general, but not when you've masturbated so much with porn that the two are linked in your mind. I found I couldn't quit only one - only made progress against either after I decided to quit both.
     
  7. MichaelJ

    MichaelJ Guest

    I think maybe we might be all different as I didn't use porn in 99% of the times when masturbating and it still messed my body and mind. I no longer even imagine anything when wanking, I just do it for the pleasure of cumming, it's become automatic self-love. I'm so broken that I no longer feel really strong climaxes lol. I like the feeling when wanking, but cumming itself actually feels like a big meh and sometimes even bad to me at this point. I wonder if you can become desensitised to orgasm? That's one thing that helps me avoid PMO. I like edging, but it often leads to the no longer pleasurable O and while I feel less anxious after climaxing, I have a low/depressed/compliant mood.

    I've quit porn long ago, I was also able to quit gaming and junk food. There are only two things I have much trouble quitting - wanking and excessive Internet use.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Feb 2, 2017
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