going good i guess

First off - congratulations on 5 weeks no PMO. That's an incredible achievement, and you should be proud of your progress and recovery. Being in a relationship can complicate things. You're doing the right thing in keeping your girlfriend informed, but you have to understand that your problem is not just yours alone as it is for those who are single, but it's also a relationship problem as well when you have a SO.

The best advice I can give you is what you are already doing - continue in your recovery and communicate with your girlfriend. The first one is essential - PMO is not an option nor will it ever be. It's a relationship killer (as you are currently understanding), and it has zero redeeming qualities. The absolute best thing you can do for yourself and your relationship is to recover. As for communication, this one is key in saving your relationship. She's still unhappy, and she still has needs that are not being met, and it's your responsibility to talk with here and work out ways that are mutually beneficial without jeopardizing your recovery (which is your primary focus). I don't know about sensate focus or the other techniques you've tried, but there is also karezza which is a good option to satisfy your girlfriend while giving you the option of continuing in your reboot without the orgasm. There's also support for her on this website as well if she's willing to consider it. Rebooting and overcoming addiction can be incredibly difficult and taxing on the SO. It appears as if you may be experiencing an extended flatline, which is a very common symptom during rebooting. Educate yourself more on your symptoms and triggers, and then educate your girlfriend and provide her with resources so she can better understand. Let her know there is light at the end of the tunnel, and support her in everything. Support her when she's sad, frustrated, hurt - this is a problem that came about from your addiction to PMO. You can receive support from NoFap and others who are going through this with you. I wish you the best of luck and continue doing well in your recovery.

 

What about just going down on her? pleasing her? and jumping rope, lift weights, do long division or whatever to deal with your own urge in a nofap'able way? I mean, I'm sure she wants YOU to feel pleasure too, but I'm also sure that helping her to some O's every now and then will put a smile on an SO's face vs. no O's at all. I'm starting the challenge but I'm leaving actual sex completely out of the challenge. If it's a real person, actually there with me, I'll be ok with it.

CONGRATULATIONS on your 5 weeks! That's amazing!