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50 year old pastor porn addict

Discussion in 'New to NoFap' started by Eero Jaakkola, Apr 3, 2017.

  1. Eero Jaakkola

    Eero Jaakkola Fapstronaut

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    I was nine when a man dragged me to the woods and forced sex. Soon after I discovered masturbation and porn. Always believed in God, committed to Jesus at 17, but could never get rid of porn. Marriage helped some, but when internet porn came available in 2003, I was lost. Did I mention I'm a pastor? Or was.

    But 2009 something happened. I cried that Jesus would save me from porn. And he did. After 33 years of porn and masturbation I was suddenly free. It was a miracle. Couldn't help it myself. Lost my job, wife left me, took the kids too. But I was free.

    Why am I here? Well, seven years after, and temptations are coming back. A few weeks ago I was searching Youtube for sex and porn. I'm afraid. I don't want to go back. I'm alone, don't have people to be accountable to. I'm an addict. Even if I never saw an erotic picture again, ever.

    And porn is such a scourge on my nation. I would like to be out in the streets yelling at people to stop.

    I got married last summer, and she's wonderful. So I'm not quitting orgasms, only porn and masturbation. Tried to set up my badge, but it didn't work, dunno why. edit: got the badge working.
     
    Last edited: Apr 4, 2017
  2. D . J .

    D . J . Fapstronaut

    Thank you for sharing your story and welcome to NoFap where you are amongst friends who are here to encourage you and sometimes challenge you but not judge you.

    What are your current strategies for combating the enemy called PMO?
     
    JimSwe likes this.
  3. JimSwe

    JimSwe Fapstronaut

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    I wish you all the strength to get through this! Sad to read your story, but glad you came all this way. We will help eachother, I think you know of Simon of Kyrene. We don't bear our cross alone. Keep fighting.
    Hälsningar från andra sidan sjön.
     
  4. Eero Jaakkola

    Eero Jaakkola Fapstronaut

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    I'd like to get off this couch and go jogging three times a week, half an hour slowly. And do my pull-ups and push-ups. That would improve my life plenty.
     
  5. D . J .

    D . J . Fapstronaut

  6. Eero Jaakkola

    Eero Jaakkola Fapstronaut

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    I checked it thank you.
     
    D . J . likes this.
  7. Klystron

    Klystron Fapstronaut

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    Hi,
    Working from a similar starting point. Only my experience began at age 4 by a neighborhood kid on our rural dead end farm road. Had t reset again today, tjis site helps being able to share my struggles and not have to hide any more. Will keep you in prayer my brothet for success on your new journey.
     
    Eero Jaakkola and D . J . like this.

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