Habits to replace PMO

We don't have to find a replacement for old habits. We can just let them go as we move on. They no longer fit into our game plan. Our goals and personal image no longer include that habit, so we just quit. As little boys/girls, we did things that we now consider disgusting, but we have moved on. There was a time when everything we picked up we put in our mouth, but now we don't do that. We also did not replace that activity with a similarly pleasing activity, like rubbing it on our tummy. We rolled in mud, we picked our nose and ate it, we insisted on wearing the same clothes for days, we slept with our skateboard, but now we never want our mothers to tell our girlfriend all our old habits. We did not replace those habits, we just grew up and moved on into more acceptable behavior. Part of giving up PMO is revisioning it as something harmful and revolting. Not only do we not want our mother telling our girlfriend about our PMO habits, we don't want to think of mom knowing about it, but she probably has a good idea of what we've been doing. Let's just grow up, give it up, and act like big boys, like real men. Let's spend more time in things that will look good on our resumes.

 

Gaming, sports and fasting really helps during NoFap

 

I am totally with you on nature abhors a vacuum. We need to stay busy, and better we should fill our lives with good activities and purpose.
I do not see moving on from PMO as a one-to-one replacement for each bad habit. If I used to enjoy playing in the mud, I did not have to find an equivalent replacement activity before I could give it up. There is not a single activity that would exactly take the place of and provide the pleasure of mud play. Still, I gave it up. I found other interests and changed my tastes. In my life, there is no "this is what I do instead of playing in mud." I would not feel comfortable in muddy clothes, and I would not want to clean up the mess I would leave on rugs and furniture. For a variety of reasons I have not played in mud recently.
I think we give up PMO in a similar way. I do not think we need one replacement activity that will give us a similar pleasure as it occupies our time before we can give up PMO. I think we give up porn because it is bad for us, it does not fit with who we want to be, and it does not help us to grow, and it can leave a mess. I think we also fill our lives with good activities that will help us to improve and be better people. Some activities get a direct replacement: a baby goes from nursing to taking a bottle. I do not see PMO as needing "a bottle" to replace it before we can give it up. We do not need that excessive PMO dopamine rush. We need to live without it. I do not suggest sitting for hours in front of a blank screen doing nothing but fighting urges to PMO. I do recommend living a full, meaningful, joyful life with real people and real rewards.

 

Kekistani shitposting.

 

The quick answer for me is journaling. I learned early on in reboot that if I'm heavily triggered I will come to this website and write in my journal what I'm going through. I do not finish writing until I am certain I have "beaten" the urge. In my 8 months of reboot, this has probably saved me from relapse at least 3-4 times. Other things I have done is picked up hobbies that I dropped at some point because of PMO. These hobbies are creative or sports/fitness oriented.

 

In my opinion, the key is to do something you absolutely love so you can immerse yourself in it completely and block anything else out

 

You've read and responded to my posts, but how do you respond to the original post for this thread? Are you in agreement with it? How would you tweak it?

 

I guess there is nothing that exactly we can replace , because when we have destroyed the normal dopamine system in our brain and there is no choice except that we have to tolerate some pain at first but while we are accepting this much pain we can have some rewards from it , the reward is to get want we want , what we always wanted and couldn't take it because of any reason
I began this program 2 years ago but I'm new here from that time I'm exercising and now I'm good in shape , I'm studying MBA in one of the great universities of my country , I improved my job ( but all of them was the things that mostly god did for me )
As a daily routine I pray , go to social meetings , read and do exercise
When I don't do them for a period ( for example 5 days ) I will get depressed because of being useless and ... you know what happen then

 

Thanks!

 

I like what you say about being helped by praying.
My beliefs are more cognitive than behaviorally based. I believe that it is by changing our way of thinking that we come around to changing our feelings and actions. In practice I understand that it is a bit of, "Which came first? The chicken or the egg?" The reality is that we now have both of them and they work well together. Anybody could start from zero by buying chickens or fertilized eggs. Either one would lead to the other and on to both together.
I think people are motivated to change more by dreams and ideas than by habits. I do recognize the importance of good habits for maintaining good behavior and steady growth. I see prayer as working in both areas. Some is a habit that is repeated at certain times and places as a ritual. Some is as conversation through which we come to new understanding, new focus, and new hope. I think that scripture readings also work in both ways, sometimes as a confirming ritual, and sometimes leading us into new insights with their motivations to better behavior. I used to spend more time reading to confirm my beliefs, but now I listen more and learn.