Why do i think like this

I mean, it sounds like the problem's weed. I tried it once and it didn't do anything for me, but if that's the only thing causing those thoughts - stop using weed. If not, start seeing a therapist if it's REALLY scaring you. It sounds a bit like you're on the younger side, but I may be wrong. If you are younger - Hormones are Hell bro. I started developing a tiny mammary gland once and it just went away in like a couple months and that was just because hormones are crazy for teenagers. Did this help? Let me know.

 

Well first remember we both have Feminine and Masculine sides,

I use to watch that sissy stuff sometimes too , but it was a short phase for me.

Sometimes though when im having urges i feel like maybe if the right guy was there i could do a bj ,

what i know for sure is ive never watched gay porn, hate seeing guys kiss, seeing attractive guys doesnt intimidate me or makes me question myself because i know that those thoughts are remnants from all those fucking videos i watched..

(for like 5 years now , ive mostly watched cum swallow bukkake bj stuff)

Also i joined an dating app to meet chicks and try to make a few guy friends and some of them offered to pay to blow me and i had zero interest.

You need to find out something that really shows you the answer and start understanding that some thoughts are static and if you give them credibility without reason, obviously youre going to get confused and or feel lost.

 

i never felt i was a girl as a kid, it was only until i was 20 and had seen thousands of porn videos of different kinds.


Youve gone 100 days and thats great, but did you do 100 days Hard mode as in no orgasm , edging or sexual stimuli ? Because i keep reading it also stimulates that addiction pathway. Also ive read guys whove gone past 100 days and feel they still need work thats why im putting little stock on the 90 day thing im giving up porn permanently and M and O for a year for starters.



Even though I havent had sex yet I do know all my urges that come on nofap are about banging a nice fat puzzy and not about wearing make up and jerking some guy off. ( the thought of that makes my Masculine side speak up in my head saying "ill knock that bitch out" )

So as far as something to show you the answer I would ask if youre still carrying guilt from that , and are you comfortable in your own skin, when you look in the mirror ?

i totaly see how memories of those videos have psyched me out a bit, when i watched the sissy trainer videos i was turned on and had gay thoughts. I mean now i see handsome guys all around and i can admit it without questioning my sexuality.

just remember there is probably no research or many accounts on this and the
media is pushing homosexualty on the public maybe stimulating the feminine sides of guys too much.

If the thoughts bother you, either your supressing these thoughts and you do wanna be a sissy, or youre straight but are scarred from porn,
or youre "bi"

i cant help you more im only on day 3 but gives us an update i wanna see what you find out.