Doubting my Sexuality.

You are in "flatline"
Just wait and hang in there . Soon you will be completely fine with a good libido.

 

Dreaded flatline sir. People claim that after flatline their libido came back with a vengeance . I am hoping for the same though but it feels like Im going to be in flatline forever. It makes me feel sick.

 

Don't worry, and enjoy the break from the PMO frenzy. This is a great time to find other activities that you really love.

 

To the point That's how adventurers feel. And it's a sign that you are on your way to achieve changes in your life.

 

^This!

 

Then use all the force of your intellect and get yourself out of the house. Is there someome you can hang out with? Push yourself.

 

Clearly, you haven't done one reboot. Depending on the individual, a reboot takes a varying amount of months. Very few reboot by 90 days - this is a widespread misconception. To repair years worth of unrelenting abuse, your brain may need 6-9 months. In some cases, a reboot may not occur inside a year. If you had rebooted, your sex drive would be normal for a guy of your age. You wouldn't have no libido, no motivation, no energy or feel asexual. Abstinence is the medicine. You might find it difficult to take - we all do - but the final reboot will be worth the sacrifice, I'm sure you will agree Shane1985.

 

thats your addictive voice talking to you. it wasn't good you didn't feel fine, that's why you came here and had the strength to break that habit. Think about how you felt after breaking a streak.
Are you exercising regularly? what about positive 'fantasizing' about who really want to be with , the life you really want....

 

totally agree. I did a 97 day but still felt i had the wiring there- i did a 55 and now i am on day 74 and feel way better at this stage than i did at day 74 of my first attempt.

Also I think there might be something in our addictive voices saying 'well once i am done i can go back to having fun'
no. it wasn't fun you're actually cutting yourself off from the real fun of life...
No one whose overweight wants says ' i can't wait to drop working out and and eating right and go back to being fat.'
this isn't about a period of self-denial it's about permanent change.

 

Dear Shane1985,

I went through what you feel many times in my life, und i understand very well how depressed, lonely, senseless, dead... this state feels.

I found the following picture helpful to understand the meaning of such a state of mind:

Imagine a forest with many trees. Make this a vivid picture in your mind, paint it with color, noises, smells, everything you'd expect in a forest. Now imagine setting this forest on fire (quitting pmo). Flames rising up high into the sky, dense dark smoke is all over... This will transform the formerly forest to nothing more than a grey, lifeless place, with ashes all over the ground (after quitting pmo). When the time is right, rain will come (new habbits you create after quitting pmo), and the water will cause many new trees to start growing (new creative activities / hobbies / friends / ...). Very small at first, and it will take time until the new forest is as big and dense as it was before.

What you experience right now are the ashes of your former pmo addicted self.

Stay strong, you've reached the first necessary step to reach your goal. Unfortunately, this does not feel as nice as you may have expected, but nevertheless it proofs that you are making progress.

 

Enjoy your flatline lack of libido. It gives you a chance to be a person without having to worry about what base you will get tonight. Enjoy the person you will sleep with every night, yourself. Get to know yourself and the rest of the people around you. For the time being, not a single one of them is a sex object for you, they are just real people, or better said, you don't see them just as sex objects, but as the real people that they really are. So, enjoy relating to real people while your brain finishes the reformatting and rebooting that it started in your first almost 90 days.
When your libido kicks back in, you will want some good friends, this is your opportunity to make them. Talk to girls, listen to girls and learn to relate to girls as people. Find out what they like and don't like while you have no interest in using them for what you want. This is your golden opportunity to go undercover and collect intelligence.
How long will flatline last? Probably not nearly long enough to really make a difference in your thinking, but there is hope it will last longer.

 

we did this to ourselves. ain't nobody else's fault. ur sexuality is still the same as it was when u were 12. I promise u. ur not alone. sex is not all there is to life

 

good point on the opportunity to go undercover and collect intelligence talk. I like that