I feel like a God!

Fuck yeah dude! Really happy for you.
Keep up! Literally!

 

Although I am really pleased with your positivity and success I always find it a little concerning when fapstronauts talk of sexual energy, conquests and having affects over women.

It sounds like you have just been born into the world after being trapped by PMO. Trapped since you were 8! So that is pretty much your whole life, especially your sexually aware life. Well done for quitting. That would also suggest that maybe you also have the sexual maturity of someone a lot younger than 21yo. Your experience of sexual politics, seduction, appreciation, exploration and most of all, sharing, all comes from P rather than real life. IF that is the case then I would advice caution. It is flattering to be acknowledged by people, by women, but be careful not to automatically interpret that as something sexual. Sex is not the common language of human interaction. It is only the common language of P. It is just as reasonable to assume that you are getting this recognition just because you are not withdrawn or responding to women in P-motivated way.

I really think you are doing well. It's good to feel life without PMO, isn't it. And you are doing really well in abstaining. But for a full recovery and a secure abstinence then your motivation for quitting PMO should be something a lot less precarious than being a sexual god. Because filling yourself with "sexual energy" whilst you are quitting PMO could lead to a massive crash. Yes, as men, we are dangerous. Most of the time we are a danger to ourselves.

I really do wish you luck and I am happy to discuss anything further with you.

 

perusan, such excellent words you speak!

 

I'm glad to know that you are doing well

 

hi gladiator,

like your story. conquer the world. you are young and you are healthy.


i also combined porn with prostitutes. i wanted to act like pornstars. try out what they are doing.

my porn-addiction started late. first i was addicted to wheed. afterwards i was/am addicted to porn.

watching porn destroyed my selfconfidence bit by bit.

i am 36 years old. with twenty years age i was like a girl-magnet. i had more girlfriends than boyfriends. i treated them like human beings and not as objects for sexualabuse. only sex with love (or without paying) was allowed. and fap once a week was no problem. i had the control!

porn changed my behavoiur against women. nowadays i cant stay alone with girls. i dont know what to do with them. its really sad how it could come so far. the lust made a feeling-cripple out of me.

the power to have sex with beautiful girls paying them gave me a sort of might. it was like - hey i am a soulcripple i have no selfconfidence - but i have sex with girls you even can dream of.

all the time i was lying to myself.

only a weak man goes to prostitutes. strong man gets the trust of women.

of course women are not perfect - we are human beings nobody is perfect - of course we have to fight for a relationship - of course we can loose the girl we love...

but all of this is better than becoming a cripple who is sitting at home and fapping whole day and living in a dreamworld with pornstars.

i had to write this down - feel better now.

 

Hey Otto,

I"m in a very similar situation as you. Hope this is healing you as well as it is healing me. Day by day I feel better about myself. I try to focus on the positive future but I can't ignore all the sexually awkward stuff that I experienced over the years. Stay strong!

 

hi fapadonna,

it is more than hard to repair a soul which has been destroyed so hard over years.

like you say it is really very hard to ignore.

i am sure i can stand the PMOfree challenge for very long time - but i dont know what to do against the urge to go to prostitutes. i was once in a month visiting some girls. i have been always very polite to them. the punter is not better than the prostitute. over the years i destroyed every kind of moral instance.

it was a mask! with every prostitute i vistited i lost a bit of my soul! the price is very high.

i am a soulcripple now - i have to deal with that.

sex is something sensual - it is not about fucking like a machine!

what the prostitute thinks or feels is not my business - it is like fucking my own money.

its a abuse nothing else.

dont know if it ever will be possible for me to put the thousands of pieces of my soul together.

thank you fapadonna stay strong too!

 

forgot something it was like:

alcohol trigger for porn - porn trigger for prostitutes

between the visits only porn and fap - nearly twice a day (two hours) nearly every day.

i did it systematical.

braindissolve for experts!

 

right the relationship to prostitutes is different.

i lost a girl - i was 21 years old. we had a relationship for two years. now i am 36.

i was not able to love again. i cant handle normal girls.

so i escaped to porn and prostitutes - never fall in love with a prostitute is the main rule.

so you cant love and loose someone.

i hope this is not to wired.

i had a few normal relationships since that girl - but never the same intensity of feelings.

porn-addiction has many causes.

so i am in a kind of predicament! afraid to love normal girls and sick of the superficial robotsex with prostitutes.


enjoy the time in ukraine.

 

Your story is inspiring, Spartan. it' s great that you have become aware of the reality around you and the light that always shined within you. Keep going in this way and you won' t need prostitutes anymore, as you will find the true happiness and love.

I wish you the best, Marco.

 

I am willing to do the 90 days of hard mode. Im about halfway there. I see beauty in women that i never used to. I haven't had too much prostitute experience but porn has ruined my brain. I'm really enjoying this healing.

 

Yes! I love posts like that. They are very motivating. I stopped working out before taking the challenge. But I feel like I am starting to get new energy, and I am ready to start back. I think I am eating less as well, which is a good thing, as I am overweight.