Did anyone MO whilst just stopping P?

I thing I did years ago was to masturbate without fantasizing sexually and without ejaculating. Essentially, I used it as a way to develop more sexual control. I also combined it with Kegel exercises.

There's a theory that a constant desire for sexual stimulation is not the result of an excess but rather a lack of sexual energy. If you can build up that energy without releasing it, sex desire becomes less
compulsive.

These days I find it more effective to avoid sexual stimulation altogether and just endure the sexual pressure temporarily until the compulsion to orgasm dissipates.

 

If I was you I would just stick to regular sex with another person women/man whatever you prefer.
If you do not have a partner! Go get one!!

 

I think you need a 90 day reboot from both then from what most say you can resume MO presuming it's not compulsive and that if you are in a relationship that it does not effect performance with your partner. The problem with a PMO continuing to MO is that even if they don't look at porn they replay it in their heads, so they are still using porn. Or they use psubs. Your brain associates O with P and eventually those that choose this path relapse to P use.

 

No more porn!! No more Masterbation !! No more excuses!!! You will love y
Who you will become!! The power you will harnesr will fell your world with greatness!!

 

Sure, I've done that, but mainly out of necessity.

Basically, I knew I needed serious lock-down on my behavior, so I became an expert in filters/blockers. I even created a video about how to block 100% of porn on Apple devices (let me know if you want the link).

Basically, I can't access porn right now, even if I deliberately tried everything in the book. My computer and phone are locked down like Fort F***ing Knox.

Getting rid of porn is a huge first step. But compulsive MO ... even without porn ... is still f***ing up your dopamine reward system. I know because that's been my continued problem. You can get rid of porn ... but it's substantially harder to get rid of the fantasies you can conjure up in your mind.

See, your brain doesn't know the difference between fapping and an experience with a real, flesh-and-blood woman. If you're fapping 4x a day, you're still hijacking your brain chemistry. You need to experience that dopamine/seratonin surge with a real-life partner. That was God's design for sex.

You, and me, and everyone else--we need to trust that sex with a real-life partner will be better if we abstain from PMO. And the truth is, it will be ... because we won't be desensitized ... we won't be disconnected ... we won't be attempting to replicate an unreasonable standard of sexuality. We will be real.

 

Exactly this.

To answer your question @JakeWoods I followed the same path last year when I struggled with constant relapse on Hard Mode (no P no M no O). So I tried something else : stopped the P entirely, but monitored my M urges/wants and it helped me understand the relationship I had with P, while helping me get rid of the habit, and started deconstructing the neural pathways that were "(un)naturally" driving me to P often despite my will. Eventually I relapsed due to temporary circumstances, but when I tried the challenge again I went further than my goals in hard mode because I had this "training" before. After a couple of cycles like this, I can safely say that the compulsion+craving is gone, and that I'm in control with zero negative consequences, be it for P or M or O.

Beware though : while it seems like an easier path at first, it actually takes much more effort over longer period of times. It takes a lot longer and depending on your sort of usage and mindset and mental state and environment (etc.), you may despair to see results or changes arise. Those happen a lot faster when you quit "cold turkey" but then again, that wasn't for me, just like this sequential approach isn't for everyone.

 

Yes. I think what you are describing works better than trying to quit M and P altogether. There is no reason to quit M as it is not bad for you unless you do it excessively. According to Your Brain on Porn, a reboot means you are quitting P, quitting M is optional and not for everyone.

 

The problem with your mindset is that you're giving your body and desires a heck of a lot of power. OVER YOU. You're saying, "I can't, therefore, I should give in", when in reality this whole struggle is about regaining or getting a "new grip on life". It is about showing (not just claiming), to your body, who is boss.

You're leaving a big door open and letting someone else hold the remote to your life; which I think will fail in the long run if you don't develop the ability to "man up" to your cravings and desires and hold them under your dominion.

Story of a completely non-sexual area that NoFap has allowed me to note in my life:
I work part time at my college as an electrician, which will probably not work very well this coming semester because of my new schedule. I told my boss that I may not be able to work next semester and he offered me an additional part time position in order to supplement my hours as an electrician. Now, I have a specific phobia since childhood to a specific piece of equipment - gas containers (not the probability of explosion, I just am affected by the shape of it. Long story). I remembered that, should I take this job, right next to my new workshop's entrance I'll have one of those waiting for me. So in my mind I immediately said: "Nope. Not taking this job." I told a coworker about the offer, and she: "That sounds awesome!", to which I immediately replied: "Yeah, no. It's not going to work."

Right at that moment I caught myself and asked: "Am I really allowing something like this to prevent me from rationally evaluating an offer?" It's pathetic. So I proceeded to gradually go and approach this object that makes me feel uncomfortable, and teach my body that I can't have limitations based on what it feels and wants.

Trust me, I only noted this limitation because of the journey I've been in for months now, getting rid of any trace of this stupid mindset that I cannot overcome this and that it has to stay the same forever. Lose the insecurities and keep moving forward.

 

AT OP, first post. Breaking down the brain process was helpful to me, and has been to many others. So, first, you need to forget everything you think you know about this situation, and start learning about it from the neuroscience up.

You said: "So I was thinking, the whole reason I watch porn is to orgasm."

No. Incorrect. It looks like it, but that is not it. The ONLY reason you watch porn is because it results in a dopamine rush that our brain interprets as euphoric. Yes, O does too, but even without O, you get the dopamine rush from watching P, because watching P results in sexual thoughts, and those are rewarded with a dopamine rush. Without that neurotransmitter, dopamine, we would find porn incredibly boring, as we would thoughts of sex. Thinking of sex, (and nothing makes us think of sex like porn), results in a dopamine rush. Just that simple. So, when you are quitting porn, it is better, and more correct, to conceive that you are quitting using porn (artificial sexual stimulation) to ride a dopamine high. Once you understand you have been riding a dopamine high, then you will better understand that during the hard 90, you, also, have to quit using M and MO, because those are also just a means of using artificial sexual stimulation to ride a dopamine high. The whole concept of quitting does involve going cold turkey, but, it does not involve going cold turkey without knowing, exactly, what you are giving up, and why. Take time to study the problem.

Hope this helps.

Peace.

Will I AM.

 

I noticed something in your post that struck me. "I've always watched porn but I remember a time where I was not addicted and I had strong willpower." I'm a SO not an addict but I read that to say that you have not let go of porn. It reads as if you think you can watch porn without getting addicted or just on occasion view it as you did in the past. Just like an alcoholic can not have just one drink you can NEVER watch porn again. I am not sure what you mean by you had willpower over porn before ? How long were you able to stop porn completely? If you never tried to them that does not mean you had willpower it was just never tested. From the outside looking in I don't think you have shifted your mindset to totally giving up porn and that's why you are struggling. It's not that you don't want to quit it's that your addiction is still tricking you into thinking maybe I can watch just a little bit. Maybe I can MO and fantasize , maybe I can get this addiction under control and watch porn again every once in awhile but you can't. You have to accept that porn is gone forever from your life. Often motivation is necessary so I hope I can give you some. This will kill your future relationships. So if you want to have a healthy happy relationship fix it now before you meet the woman of your dreams and she walks away due to your addiction. I hope this helps. You see you have a problem and you want to fix it you are on the right path.

 

The answer is in my signature ...

 

I don’t have answer either. It’s something I’ve been wondering about. I would say go 90 days without anything. After that you could maybe, and I stress the word maybe, MO once a month. There’s no reason why you should need to MO more than that. If you have a partner or are having sex, no need to MO. I think MO is only for that release once in a while, if you can do it only once a month and not fantasizing about porn related imagery. The dangers of MO are that some people are addicted to that (not me), but it can lead to porn. I never cared for MO without p and always wanted p, so to MO isn’t very useful or satisfying. However, I am considering doing it every once in a while if I am not having sex, just so I don’t feel like I’m going insane. But the verdict is still out on that and hopefully I will be having sex by then and won’t even need to. Cheers.

 

By the answer I meant, that I've gone without P much longer than without MO.

The problem is that people are so stubborn, because they think, that if God exists, He must help everyone on the planet... God is not the reason why children die from starvation. It's humans fault. There is a reason, why God gave human hands, legs and mind to think and free will to choose from good and evil (good and evil must exists in this world, either there would not be free will).

Now follow this logic:

1) Why are children starving? - Because their parents don't give them food or doesn't have enough resources to do so.
2) Why parents don't have enough resources to feed their children? - Either because they are poor or the environment in which they live, is not fertile enough to produce food.
3.1) Why are they poor? Well either they are lazy to work or they can't find a job.
3.2) In the case of infertile land - Why doesn't the parents move to a more fertilized land, so that they can feed their children?
4) If parents are lazy to work or move to a more fertile land, to feed their children - The parents are guilty that their children is starving.
5) Ultimately, if there are people who stuff their stomach full of cakes and other useless stuff, and spend millions and billions of dollars, to buy new cars, homes and stuff they don't need - If resources would be distributed evenly, there would no be starvation - again - people are guilty of the blood of starving children.

Also, if the children, don't have parents, the society, where they live, must take care of that child. Otherwise, the society is guilty of his death. Our society, has come to a point where they think only about themselves, and don't even do a single thing to help anyone around them (not everyone, but majority).

God is not a gold fish, who grants all wishes. People must do everything themselves. God gave us bodies, life and mind. If a thing can be done physically and it's possible for human to do, no matter how much attempts and how much willpower you need to do it, you must do it. God is not gonna do the work for you. That's Christianity's twisted understanding of God. God doesn't need to pour food down from heaven, to feed children. People must distribute resources evenly. People must use only as much as they need, not as much as they want. If it were so, there would not be starvation or poor people at all.

​

 

I think the question of should you MO is a contentious issue, it's something human beings have done since we first set foot on this world, heck, even some animals do it! It's a personal choice and one which you should not take lightly, especially if you are still struggling with porn consumption, in that respect quitting cold turkey for at least 90 days is useful. Personally I still MO once in a while but have not viewed porn for nearly three years, instead I imagine what my potential partner might look like or engage in healthy and 'realistic' fantasy. We are whether we like it or not sexual beings and sex is a very powerful driving force in human behaviour and it all depends on how you approach it and whether you know enough about yourself and respect yourself enough to use it responsibly. Should you supress natural urges? and is that supression healthy in the long run? i would argue it probably isn't. Sex is natural, porn is not as it is born out of greed and exploitation. Although if you MO 4 times a day then you have a problem, if it's two or three times a month as a release of sexual tension then you are not causing yourself any harm and neither are you causing others harm. I'm sure if and when I get a partner I will have no need to er...'relieve myself' since I will be more intersted in nurturing an intimate relationship with someone else. The real problems arise when you come to 'love the prison you are in' and become complicit in your own destruction, such as with compulsive porn use.

 

Before this try, i M'd 4 times a month (once in a week). It's totally destructive. Don't fool yourself into thinking that one or two times is okay.. It's not as effective as PMO everyday, but the all the symptoms of PMO addict are there (brain fog, depression, hair graying etc...)