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zilean
Last Activity:
Apr 17, 2024 at 8:50 AM
Joined:
Apr 14, 2020
Messages:
70
Likes Received:
365
Trophy Points:
53
Manage Groups:
0

Following 7

  1. Wilderness Wanderer
  2. goodnice 3.0
  3. Revolutionar
  4. Bingles
  5. LostSon41
  6. One Eyed Owl
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Followers 7

  1. reconditioned mind
  2. Sammy1914
  3. Bingles
  4. Macamhain
  5. Strong.men
  6. goodnice 3.0
Show All
Gender:
Male
Birthday:
Aug 21, 1996 (Age: 27)
Location:
Texas

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zilean

Fapstronaut, Male, 27, from Texas

Conquering some stresses at work. Just feels like I can’t get everything done. Need to bring my hope of heaven into todays reality. Apr 17, 2024 at 9:04 AM

zilean was last seen:
Apr 17, 2024 at 8:50 AM
    1. zilean
      zilean
      Conquering some stresses at work. Just feels like I can’t get everything done. Need to bring my hope of heaven into todays reality.
      Apr 17, 2024 at 9:04 AM
    2. zilean
      zilean
      Rode the dopamine train too far. Needed to have pumped the breaks. Details in my journal.
      Apr 14, 2024 at 12:36 AM
      1. Lou Bloom and silex_jedi like this.
    3. zilean
      zilean
      Psalms 27:4 - be the one thing I desire today
      Apr 10, 2024
      2. Bingles
        Bingles
        My personal favourite is Psalms 73, a real eye-opener.
        Apr 10, 2024
        zilean likes this.
    4. zilean
      zilean
      Beat an urge this morning at my computer by pausing and thinking about what my stresses are. Then breathing out and releasing them to God.
      Apr 7, 2024
      1. silex_jedi and +TenPercent like this.
    5. zilean
      zilean
      Had a slip yesterday. That one and the one before were not followed by binges. I need to pursue time with God a bit more to settle my mind
      Apr 7, 2024
      1. +TenPercent likes this.
      2. +TenPercent
        +TenPercent
        Good job not binging. That's a big step in the right direction. First thing I want to do after a slip is . . . slip again. Also, you are resisting. You can't have a slip if you're not trying to get better.
        Apr 7, 2024
        zilean likes this.
    6. zilean
      zilean
      On another reboot... beginning to see the time and energy wasted on PMO in my life. Looking to do work on my identity in Christ!
      Mar 30, 2024
    7. zilean
      zilean
      Nothing like being on the front line of a life coming to Jesus to remind you about your purpose. Ty Lord for letting me be a part of it!
      Jun 24, 2023
    8. zilean
      zilean
      a good day with meaningful connections, recovery group dinner, and realized wisdom from the Lord for a challenging scenario
      Mar 6, 2023
    9. zilean
      zilean
      striving to win the battle
      Mar 5, 2023
      1. SilentWolfSong likes this.
    10. zilean
      zilean
      Finished a stressful weekend work event. Slowing down today to reflect on how I could've done better. Also finding myself again. Kept clean!
      Nov 15, 2022
      1. willpower2020 likes this.
    11. zilean
      zilean
      Working step by step, Day 6 out of 7.
      Nov 4, 2022
      1. from2003 likes this.
      2. from2003
        from2003
        Great
        Nov 4, 2022
    12. zilean
      zilean
      consciously made it to day 7 of 14!
      Oct 1, 2021
      1. bellator de Christi likes this.
      2. bellator de Christi
        bellator de Christi
        Halfway there. Keep it up.
        Oct 1, 2021
    13. zilean
      zilean
      On day 3 of recovery. This time I’m setting a goal of 14 days; a step I seem to have missed before. =/
      Sep 27, 2021
    14. zilean
      zilean
      Two roads diverge in a yellow wood... I stopped here to look, I want to take the one He took
      Aug 17, 2021
    15. zilean
      zilean
      Been enjoying staying over with friends! Limited urges. My schedule has been purposeful. Maybe boredom is a driver for my PMOs
      Apr 3, 2021
      1. keybladewielder likes this.
    16. zilean
      zilean
      successfully disengaged that temptation! Reading your own wise words in your journal really gives you a certain something
      Mar 30, 2021
      1. Ahmed_199, Mr. Crab and eagle rising like this.
    17. Deleted Account
      Deleted Account
      How good are ya on league?
      Mar 28, 2021
      2. zilean
        zilean
        I main support; at the mercy of the machine, i never made it out of silver
        Mar 28, 2021
      3. Deleted Account
        Deleted Account
        That's unfortunate to hear. bruv.
        Mar 28, 2021
    18. zilean
      zilean
      Church was awesome and refreshing & got to meet with and interact with people
      Mar 28, 2021
      1. IWantToBreakFree123 likes this.
    19. zilean
      zilean
      Getting ready to go to church. First time in a long time
      Mar 28, 2021
    20. zilean
      zilean
      who do you tell when you have gone beyond the "normal" rabbit trail? at this point, i think i need some counseling
      Mar 27, 2021
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  • About

    Gender:
    Male
    Birthday:
    Aug 21, 1996 (Age: 27)
    Location:
    Texas
    Journal Thread Link:
    View my Journal
    It began in 5th or 6th grade, about age 11-12 and has followed me many many years till now at age 25.

    I grew up in a Christian home without father, who left before i was born. I found the Lord at a young age at 6 and committed my life to Christ, and loved to follow him.

    Once this shackle attached itself to me, I was truly serving two masters. I desired all my life to be freed from this hinderance. I faithfully continue walking with the Lord to this day, but the reality of what that means only began to start hitting.

    Self Control. I have thought that I had been exhibiting this fruit of the spirit, i was easily angered as a kid when an injustice was done to me in a game, but grew out of that stage. But it has been in these past couple of years that I realized that I lack self-control in denying my self the temporal pleasures of PMO and choosing life that can be had abundantly.

    For a while I was focused on modifying my behavior while neglecting the heart and reason for these things. My anxiety to engage with girls after being told not to have a girlfriend till I graduate college. My longing to be in an intitmate relationship with another while my friends all began to move that direction (as much a middle schooler could do). Wishing I could just be held by someone.

    And so, I begin my documented NoFap Journey on April 14, 2020 to have daily checkins and just have a place to write out what I have been feeling and the healing that can come.

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    Content:

    Signature

    Challenges Completed: |3|7|14|21|30|40|50|60|90|120|200|300|365|
    [​IMG]
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