relationships

Yes, I am a cheater. I was cheated on once before. It is probably one of the hardest things I have ever had to experience. I swore to myself that I would never do that to another person and I believed it. I lived by that for most of my life. Then I became the cheater. There are a lot of...

I want this journey to be based on accountability and truth. Please do not excuse my actions for any reason. I am in the wrong. I have been in two relationships with my current girlfriend. There is little doubt that she broke my heart in the first instance. I thought we would never get back...

There's a whole forum on this site dedicated to rebooters in relationships and another one about dating during a reboot. But porn also kills other relationships. It certainly killed so many of mine. I'm a 20 y/o guy currently in college and boy am I lonely. There are many people I really admire...

My girlfriend and I are on our second go-around. Meaning, we broke up last year and got back together this year. One of the things I have noticed about her lately is that she is much more attached to me now than before. We have always spent much time together, whether before or after. She used...

One of the most meaningful things in a man's life can be a platonic friendship with a woman. There is something so pure and compassionate about the love a female friend gives you, especially in times of need. I've had many female friends in my lifetime because they are easy to talk to. However...

Hi everyone! I am a 20-year-old college student seeking to rehabilitate the problematic sexual behavior I display in my everyday life. I am not trying to recover from porn addiction, as that is a fight that cannot be fought until I fix my behavior. I am a man who is haunted by my own mistakes...

I've been working on recovering from porn addiction for a few months now, and lately I've been realizing that I've been leaning on my significant other ("s/o") for support, to the point that I've been basically using them only for emotional support and not valuing them as a partner. I've been...

Freya India recently wrote about it on Substack. There are times when I wish I was in a relationship, but I would rather be single than be an Instagram boyfriend. I think one big red flag is a woman who has an Instagram profile full of photos of herself as if she's some sort of model. It is a...

I'm curious about why married men watch porn behind their wives' backs. Is it a lack of physical attraction towards your partner?

hey guys , what do you guys suggest me if I am a person with low social credit , tier 2 city , and a virgin with no girls around . i don't get to see any girls around me so I don't even have a chance to try . how do I find girls?? help me I can't find girls.

I have been a social butterfly for as long as I could remember. However, there are two major problems with my relationships (both platonic and non-platonic). 1. None of my friendships are extended to after school settings. -> Over the past few years, I have moved nomadically from friend group...

Recently, I experienced my first episode of what I was told was dissociation. It came after seeing a guy I had gone on one date with and ended up giving me all sorts of mixed signals for over a month, to which I had finally pulled the plug and blocked him. Seeing him had brought up a lot of pain...

Hi everyone Im just introducing myself here, for anyone who is willing to read this. I am a 20 year old male, about to head into my final year of college next month. i've been using porn since I was probably 13. my porn tastes are quite vanilla and haven't escalated to anything extreme, however...

I'm just asking this, because I ended one last week Wednesday. She basically threw the last straw at me and I have the comment still in my eyes. But what is the point of friendships/relationships? I've been told that they don't last forever. I'm theoretically starting to believe this to be...

Hi everybody, I am new here and ready to begin taking the NoFap journey seriously. I fell that I need to make my confession somewhere in order to begin my recovery journey and I hope this is a safe place to say some things. I don't feel like I have anybody in my life yet with whom I am can be...

Writing this to share some of the positives that have occurred throughout my journey so far, albeit almost a month, I have made large strides in understanding myself and finding meaning in my own life. Here is an entry in my journal from a few days ago, minus some personal details: At the...

Porn is totally free and available at any time 24/7. It's like getting heroine for free all the time. who's gonna hate this? it's a big pleasure (big dopamine) = big happiness! No one right? BUT if you see its effects on your life, then you must hate it. I'm reading about the effects of porn...

"... is to become an amazing person." - Mark Manson [https://markmanson.net/how-to-find-the-one] Thoughts anyone? I like it. It's counter-intuitive yet it feels true to me. Manson says earlier in the article that "[...] everyone wants a perfect partner, but few people want to be the perfect...

I'm not new to PMO, and I've been trying to recover for the past 6 to 8 months or so. Maybe up to a year, but one of the goals I set for myself was to find a partner. However, I didn't realize how much anxiety this would give me. It's always been a goal of mine to be with someone, but through...

*Please only comment if you have experience with NT-Autistic relationships* Hi everyone, I am a 39-year-old Autustic man engaged to a 37-year-old NT woman. Some background: this year has been difficult for us; I ended up losing my job due to Covid in April while she was furloughed until the...

I have a pretty relationships asking post. But seeing society to these days lately. I'm thinking about relationships and being able to conquer one myself. I'm starting to think it won't even happen for me unless I get back into school. But on the other hand relationships happen to my friends...

Hello dear reader, I am mainly looking for advice and hoping that somebody with more experience shares his views with me. If this is not the correct subforum, please contact me, I will gladly go to the appropriate place. This post will probably contain triggers, so please be careful and...

I'm stuck! I've been dating a girl for about 18 months now, and while she's sweet in many ways, she's also seriously unwell mentally; diagnosed personality disorder, history of hospital stays, self harm, suicide attempts, etc. Plus ongoing physical health issues with her digestive system. The...

If you have no friends, you probably don't use social media. I stopped using it a long time ago. It has its perks (I hate using it, and also don't have to worry about employers looking me up and finding something they don't like), but the massive drawback is that people can very quickly find out...

Hello, There's a trend in my relationships with women that kinda annoys me and I wanted to talk about it here. I'm not necessarily asking for advice, as my situation has a lot to do with my life context and I accepted the fact that not much will change for the next 1-2 years and best route for...

Hi, i'm new in this page. I just admitted that I got a problem with my personal relantionships because of my porn and masturbation habits. Since my mother died, when I was 12 (i'm 22) I started watching porn and jacking me off, at firts it helped me to quit or avoid stress and anxiety, then I...

I miss when I was up in 70+ days, I was the best version of myself... Now I'm back on ground. I feel like I hate myself.... Like I've ruined everything around me. My separation anxiety is over the roof as I continue to overthink everything. I don't know what to do. I feel like my communication...

Warning a bit sexually explicit I don't like being graphic but felt I have choice in discussing the subject. Growing up evangelical I was told sexual compatibility wasn't a thing. I remember hearing a sermon about dating and relationships and the preacher saying if you're a man and she's a...

Here we go, this will be a long one. I have been an addict for 13 years, never making it more than a few days without PMO. Despite this I still believed in no sex before marriage (talk for another day). Four years ago I met a girl who happened to be my first girlfriend ever, I was 22 going on...

The answer seems to be a resounding yes from Katie Couric on her podcast Next Question with Kate Couric. In the first part they look at how porn affects a relationship and the next part they look at how porn effects young people. Thought it was pretty good. It can be heard here or on your...

As I write this, I'm a single man and from time to time I have felt lonely. But in recent times, I haven't felt that need of wanting and having a girlfriend, sex and being in a relationship. That it is no longer high on the list of priorities. As I've been focusing on my life. Working on my life...

Five Things to Build Trust I want to share some information I gathered in the podcast The Betrayed, The Addicted, and the Expert. These are things that were shared by the expert on the show in regards to building or rebuilding trust. This is such a common question for SOs and is one I struggle...

QUICK DETAILS: Where I live prostitution is legal, and prostitutes are regularly tested and must essentially have a license. These women predominantly are not the victims of sex trafficking, and are adults (they pay taxes, and a ton of fees to the government, they are registered sex workers). I...

I am a teen ...just like others ....i just tried discovering myself ... i went on deep ...and all that internet stuff , but got addicted... its been nearly 4 years of trying , i have experienced decrease in hair quality , weaker and appearances of vessels in my genital, i am lacking the swift...

Hey Ladies and gentleman. I have been struggling some time now with dating on rebooting or just in spite of making connections with woman. I have been online dating ever since the middle of last year and now I'm thinking of taking a break. I've had countless occurrences where I am meeting a...

Celebrated my dear mother today, and I know not everyone has a great relationship with their moms, but I recognize that one of the people hurt most by my struggle with porn is my own mom :/ And she was one of the first people I lied to about my struggle with porn. Lied to her face. On multiple...

Hi all Just found this place and wondering if my porn addictions are connected to how I am with women... I’m 38 never married, had several long term relationships but they have always got to the point where I’m bored of the sex... in between these relationships I’ve slept around, and it’s like...

I see a lot of women on dating sites who say they are looking for friends. Some only want to be friends, whereas others are looking for a long-term romantic relationship but want to start as just friends. Now, I have no problem with just being friends with the opposite gender. It's fine if...

This happened when I wasn't doing NoFap, so I have put it in the off-topic section. Last autumn I matched with a woman on POF. My opening line was about Twin Peaks because I saw on her profile that she was into that. So then a series of long messages back-and-forth happened, mainly about Twin...

Hey, all! As recommended, just posting my own situation as I join the movement :p I'm a 29-year-old guy in a relationship (recently engaged). I'm also a therapist, and super intrigued by the claims that many on here make about the outcomes and the science behind it. I'm not shouting it...

Hey friends! So I've been dating this girl for a little over a year now. She's a super awesome person and great to be around, but I feel like our relationship might be getting close to its end. We both met while in college, but I graduated last year and shes still in college. Currently it...

Welcome NoFap fam, I didn't know which section this is supposed to be in so i'll put it in here for now but the mods are wellcome to move it to a more fitting section if they want to. So my question is, since we have so many different people here who are all in different situations in their...

Heya to all, or whoever stumbles across this I have just recently joined and I'm trying to understand what truly the whole nofap is about. I want to get the core of the wholw ethose, the root, the og cause and the core belief. Is it that men go on the nofap to just try and stop porn and the...

Hi, I'm new here. I just began with NoFap a few days ago. I disclosed my porn habit to my partner early on in our relationship. The problems my addiction created have been present under the surface the whole time but only recently have those problems really surfaced. She called me out on the...

I'm writing this post, half as a way of seeking advice, and half as a way to just get things out of my head. I've been dealing with some pretty bad lonliness recently. I've been dealing with it for years, but recently it's really gotten a lot stronger. I've had plenty of relationships, some...

Yup... Today was the day I needed to create an account. I've always had my worst days, my worst weeks, my worst months... I'm not perfect. I'm here to fix my life, and as a Christian, to find the path to salvation. I'm a 22 year old guy, who finds a lot of things interesting in life, but I...

The cycle is always the same with me; 24-48h after stopping sex and masturbation I go into "erectile flatline" (penis shrivels up and becomes lifeless, very difficult to get an erection, and can't keep it very easily or even at all) I stay in this state for 2-3 weeks and then all of a sudden my...

I had to read a lot about this subject to realize it's true. Masturbation can ruin your life and it's happening to me. I'm 25 years old (Chilean) and I'm about to become a language Teacher. Here's the thing: I masturbate almost everyday and I can't stop. At first I thought it was completely...

Where's the (thin) line between having a high sex drive and not getting enough sex? I ask this because I've been going through some relationship issues with my SO (significant other). In fact, last week we took some "space" which then led to breaking up, just yesterday. A friend of mine said...

i have strong urges to that I’m having a really hard time shaking. I’ve always had a really strong interest in BDSM - and not just the light stuff like furry cuffs but the whole “dungeon” scenario with lots of kinks - but my wife couldn’t be more opposite. She has low sex drive, experiences pain...

So, I'm that 21 y/o guy addicted to porn for many years... This thing has caused me frustration and defeats in many aspects of my life, or at least that's what I want to believe... What was a slight shyness escalated to a social anxiety that makes it difficult for me to relate with others. Ofc...

So since the age of 10 I have liked this girl for 7 years (I’m 17) the first time I asked her out I was 10 and got rejected with one long paragraph and this was my first rejection ever. (which impacts the tension between me and her for the rest of the story) (Middle school) Couple years go by...

Does having your SO on here cause extra tension in your relationship? Has something been said on here that leads to a fight irl? For those who's SO isn't on this thread if they joined this forum would you leave? If I was in a relationship and my SO joined this forum I think I'd leave and join...

I gave up NoFap for a week or so. All the usual side effects came back: loss of motivation, lower energy, asocial mindset and so on. But alot of time i also feel this kind of joy i cant imagine ever experiencing during a streak. Freedom to enjoy, to be me, to not fight 23h a day against my...

Hi, I turned 30 this year and I started serious NoFap at the end of the last month. I've been doing great, though I still watch some stuff but I don't fap to it. It's sometimes hard but when I feel I have to do it, I just go and ride a bike. It's been more than 3 weeks now. I've been on NoFap...

Hello there, I’ll be super frank in everything I say despite not being proud about it. Im 25, in a relationship, currently having problematic sex life after a month of living together. I was fapping since I was 19 and watching porn since I was 15. Soo my sex life has been good since I was 22...

hello. this is my first day on nofap and im excited to be on this journey with others and know that im not alone in this. i have been dating this amazing girl for 2 months and she is everything i look for in a partner. shes funny and geeky like me, but she is asexual. for those who dont know...

I know it is hard to define but I'm interested in in it and ideas for increasing it. What do you think it is? Would you say it is emotionally relating to the needs of others - feeling pain when they feel pain and feeling the potential emotional consequences of actions on others as though you...

Hello all. I'm 18 years old and brand new here. I made an account with NoFap, after reading through a lot of articles and forum posts here, with the primary intention of posting this: I think I can say with some certainty that I’m no longer actively addicted to porn. I watched porn pretty...

I think it's fair to say generally women hate sports but why? And why do some women like sports? I read that it has to do with how a woman is brought up. If a girl wants to bond with her dad and he loves sports she will develop a love for sports, on the other hand, if he doesn't like sports a...

I have a female friend who often flirts with me and I liked this and would regularly flirt back. We’ve recently made some new friends and I see that she flirts with them too and I somehow felt betrayed by this. Now I realized that she may just be a flirt that does it with everyone just for the...

Hey guys. As the title says, I was being stupid and sent a screenshot of my name om urban dictionary to a couple of my friends who are girls. Ive attsched a screenshot of it to here. Anyway, I thought it would be funny, but it says stuff about me being a nice and caring boyfriend, making friends...

Well there have been innumerable occasions when you might have come across this question in countless places, including the case where you might have pondered over this question yourself. In this life of yours where people come in, some stay, some leave, but do leave a mark, good or bad, which...

I had one friend who said his wife was his best. He would be constantly calling her and seemed to genuinely enjoy being around her. Another friend is the opposite. He said his wife isn't his friend. At times there seems to be a mistrust amongst them. My friend hopes she doesn't leave him but...

I'm sick of feeling unmotivated. I'm sick of struggling to maintain an erection with my girlfriend, or even get one sometimes. I'm sick of thinking "I won't see her for two days, so I get to jerk off tomorrow!". I'm sick of feeling guilty because I'm looking at other women sexually. I'm sick of...

I’ve been with my girlfriend for 4 months everythings been good for 4 months apart from some sexual issues. I’m one month in to nofap and thats all sorted out now. However I’ve started to feel less emotional towards my girlfriend. I’m less interested/ keen and I’m starting to doubt whether i...

I'm 18 and in high school and I've completed 20 days of no PMO. I've been off and on doing nofap since July of 2017 usually for a week or two at a time before another relapse. I'm finally tied with my streak that I first had when I started this journey (woohoo!). My girlfriend broke up with me...

Hey all, So my husband is new to the reboot, to get our history/my story - please check out my journal. Long story short, I've caught him PM'ing / lying /denying way too many times. He's on his last leg with me, us; our marriage. After our latest D-Day, he joined this forum in the hopes of...

Hello everyone My name's Cory and I'm currently abstaining from porn and masturbation. Porn was something I found at age 13 and developed a relationship with which continued till about 21. I am now 23. Even before I found this site I'd understood the harmful effects of porn and so over about a...

Hey guys fist post but not my first attempt at nofap .I've been trying to quit the stuff for over a year now, with my longest stretch being about two weeks (second time I've achieved this stretch was today until relapse). The ED has never been that much of a problem (the odd stretch here and...

http://www.businessinsider.com/most-common-relationship-problem-is-unrealistic-expectations-2018-1

Hello! I was encouraged to introduce myself to the community so here we go. I am a female in my late twenties, am all about music and literature with a special fascination for psychology and sociology. I also like partying and drugs. (Please let me know if talking about drugs is permitted in...

I found this extremely helpful to listen to so I'm posting it here. I don't expect everyone to agree with everything in it but it had some logic and philosophy that's hard to dismiss and very applicable to addicts, possibly uncovering the source of much sexual dysfunction that seems to be...

Hi, new here and curious to explore the NoFap culture. I have thought that porn was great in the past, teaching me all kinds of sex moves and so on, without really questioning what it was implicitly teaching me about women, what all this rough sex was really saying about the role of women in...

AS seen with many posts about loneliness – believe you and me, I have felt rather shitty about being lonely – and had a right downer over being single on numerous occasions. Given the time I have gained more clarity the longer I have done NoFap. Sure, we have days where things are hunky dory...

Hi everyone. I'm in a serious long term relationship with an addict. Tonight, right at this very moment, I can safely say I have never felt so much hurt and felt so insignificant in my entire life. And that makes me feel guilty somehow because two weeks ago I once again placed my trust in him...

Hello everyone! I've been on the path to becoming a better person for about a year now, but I've continually been tripping up on some vague, unknown sexual obstacle. After doing some research, I think the psychological effects of growing up watching porn are contributing a lot to my personal...

Discovered masturbating at age 11, porn and hentai at age 13/14, been using it ever since. At first, I used it because it felt so good and I kept wanting more. Later, I needed it to remedy depression and it gave me a feeling of acceptance and connection when I felt rejected and lonely...

A thread for men to share their thoughts and advisements on dating and relationships. I started dating very late at 25yrs old. I've had 5 separate gfs in 3 years time. One of them a single mom. The 1st 3 I met online and the last two I met in real life at a store and at the mall. It's BAD to...

I am currently in a strange not-quite-relationship with my daughter's mum and can't quite figure out if it's healthy or not and then what I can do about it. I will explain a little more below, but essentially I'm looking for nuanced opinions from people who aren't invested in the situation to...

Hey everyone, I've been going two days since my last relapse but I've noticed that in these two days the idea of searching porn, masturbating, or just getting aroused in general was no longer something I began to crave anymore. I've gotten to the point on where if I browse and view porn I don't...

So I went on my first date ever on Friday I thought ever thing went well me and my date were talking a lot enjoying each other's company she was smiling and laughing. she told me she had plans with her cousins before the date but we ended up taking for like an hour and a half then I had hugged...

Just curious. Would you date a work colleague if you liked them? I've worked with couples and it's not a pretty sight when they have a fight in the workplace. On the other had I've work with other couples who leave their fights out of the workplace.

Hey everybody, So... before I start.. yes. The subject and user name is a joke. I want to beat the addiction, not actually beat it haha. Alrighty, little background. I am 20 years-old and I was raised in a very religious family... I first started masturbating at a young age... with the...

I was listening to podcast and this was said: Girls want a nice guy, they want a guy who respect them, they also want a guy who stands up for himself and challenges them when necessary. Do you agree? Would also be interested in what women think about this?

DISCLAIMER: This is by no means a social study on loneliness and I am by no means a psychiatrist. This is simply what I've seen in my own experience and what I have concluded from those experiences. Recently I've noticed a trend with many people who are single and struggle with PMO. Loneliness...

I'm starting to wonder if you take cold showers you'll be more successful with dating. If a married couple takes cold showers they'll never get divorced. Why? Because a cold shower is a way of bring intentional pain and discomfort upon ourselves. Most relationships end because we can't cope...

I posted this on the Christian Fapstronaut section but I thought I'd ask it here too. Would you marry a divorcee? Is it immoral to marry a divorcee?

Hello everybody. I hope you all doing well. I am a 22 year-old male. I don't have a girlfriend. I am afraid. I am suffering from OCD, which greatly influences my daily life. I feel a lot of stress every day and almost every hour. I also have some social anxiety. It's hard for me to look at...

Do you know your SO love language? Do you know yours? Find out your love language by taking the quiz here. I got this: Don't know if anyone has read the book but you can find out more here. I haven't read it myself but it's on my to read list. Most marriage counselors recommend reading it...

Would you let your SO read your private journal? Would you want to read your SO private journal? I've started writing a private journal on an online platform, and I was wondering if I get into a relationship again would I let my SO read it. It would be a great way for her to know what kind of...

I was with this girl who would tell me so much about her ex. I know his age and where he lives. She told me about the times they would kiss and cuddle and the fights they had. I hated knowing about this stuff but I also was curious. I expect they were things I didn't know but I think I knew too...

When we date, don't we just present this false self to the person we're with? Then we continue this false character as the relationship develops. Because if our SO truly finds out who we really they will want nothing to do with us! This is what Brené Brown said in a TED Talk: For men, shame...

What should a persons expectations of a relationship be when they're dating? Should they hope for the best but expect the worse? Should they enjoy it while lasts because it'll eventually end? Or should they expect a long lasting relationship? Should we be pessimistic or optimistic when a new...

Hi everybody!! As you can read from the title masturbating has led to my penisn so desensitized that when my gf comes I always say excuses to get out of having sex. When I masturbate I edge out and don't ejaculate while masturbating, also porn is a minor problem but still not to be...

Who should be in charge of a relationship? The man or the woman? Or is there no one in charge? Many Christians will be familiar with Ephesians 5:22: "Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord." But then there's Ephesians 5:21: "Submit to one another out of reverence...

I'm currently in a LDR. We are perfect together, we share the same flaws and interests, we share our lives with each other, she feels like home. She's everything I want in a girl: she's got a big butt, she's a healthy kind of clingy, she's understandable, dedicated, lovable. Thing is, although I...

Then and now, before and during NoFap. SINCE doing NoFap for nearly 40 days (at the time of writing). The changes in me are more apparent than ever. The most notable one has been where it concerns women. My attitude towards women has changed from not watching porn and masturbating – and all...

Hey, guys! First of all: you all doing a great job! The fact that you are already here is really HUGE change. I want to ask: did you noticed any positive changes between you and your SO (wife/GF, husband/BF) when you started your journey? What is the most noticable experience in the...

Day 21: Irony. I couldn't stop thinking about it. I didnt WANT to stop thinking about it. It was all I wanted for so long and NoFap gave me the power to make it happen. *sigh* I slept with that girl last night after having met her the day of. Most of you may be thinking "That's great though! You...