How much do 'healthy' people masturbate?

This is a very interesting question. One for which I have no answer based on any evidence whatsoever. I wonder if truly "healthy" people feel the urge to M at all. I mean, I would assume they are doing many things in their free time that they truly enjoy that would make solo M a waste of time. I'm not sure. Good food for thought.

 

A psychology professor of mine once said, "All people lie, and all people masturbate."

There's a lot to meditate on there ...

 

They don't.

 

maybe once or twice in a month - for sure not 15 times (or more) in a week.

 

That's a good question, X. It's like an alcoholic asking how much normal people drink. I think the answer isn't the volume but the attitude. When I'm with old friends and we're having fun I can drink a lot and get really hammered, but that's the only time I enjoy drinking. I've thought before that perhaps the only way I should enjoy porn is with a buddy and use it as a way to connect with another person. This might not be something only a gay guy would do ... Perhaps it's even easier if you're not gay. Or perhaps it's something striaght guys can do with their girlfriends, although it might not be the same .... Hmmm ... Ok, maybe it's an idea that doesn't translate well between orientations, but there are a lot of bi guys who advertise for PMO buddies and I've wondered if that's a good halfway point for me. Right now I think for all of us it perhaps isn't the porn so much as the isolation and shame that is the problem. But then I worry I'll get stuck in limbo with just a PMO buddy and not look for a full life partner. But then I see so many of you guys with partners and the problem persists ... Something to mull over.

 

That's also my opinion. E.g. do you think that people like Barack Obama and Bill Gates are masturbating? I really doubt this. Or for Karl Lagerfeld, it is pretty sure that he has no sex at all.

I know some people who all the time "fully energized" and they doing so many things that I doubt that they are masturbating.

On the other side, some of the "high profilers" are using alcohol or drugs to come down - it's a well-known problem.

 

Guys, I think there is quite a bit of wishful thinking here...

If you watch "the great porn experiment" by the guy who does yourbrainonporn https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wSF82AwSDiU you will come across the moment when scientist tried to find men not using porn for a control group, and couldn't. We at NoFap, and people having given up porn, are that control group.

Most men use porn (and many women) all humans masturbate, often daily. In Western culture, mastubation is considered normal and healthy. Because it is. Mastubation within the context of porn addiction, is not. Therefore all the abstinence and rebooting (though this is a limited approach, see my journal).

Eastern cultures had a different approach, based on taoist and yogic ideas that orgasm and ejaculation are and can be seperate things with training. Ideas of Chi or Ki being weakened by ejaculation also come from here, and are directly related to the "superpowers if you stop mastubating" ideas found here.

There is nothing wrong with masturbation, what is damaging is pornified mind and masturbation, and an inability to connect with a human you are having sex with because you are watching porn in your head while vaginally masturbating. That's rubbish, not to mention rude to the lovely lady in question...

And don't worry, just because most men use porn and masturbate, doesn't mean it is a good idea, for them or for you.

 

freedomflight who knows.

maybe you are bill gates.

this is an addiction you cant see - your look does not change.

 

i totally agree with this statement. when i get cured anytime in future i would masturbate again.

still there will always be a danger of relapsing to porn. masturbating and watching porn is intermeshed in my brain. it will be very hard to seperate it - maybe impossible.

 

Monkotto,

I am not so sure, then again it does depend on length of addiction, age and so on. For me I have 25+ years without internet porn and less than 15 with. Actually for me it is "pornified" and extreme fantasies, reinforced in early teens by my fathers (non-internet) porn that are more of a problem for me, and which later found their expression in internet porn.

Once an addict always an addict. This must be remembered, it is as true for friends who were (are) alcoholics than it is for us. I have a very good friend who was a crack and heroin addict. When asked him how he beat it he said "don't feed the bad dog, eventually it dies". He was referring to this story I think:


He also said, best thing to do is get addicted to something positive, so he got addicted to his wife and kids.

Still I believe that it would be possible, with strong mind, to create a positive masturbation habit (no porn, positive fantasies). Have a look at my journal for some stuff on habit creation.
http://www.nofap.org/forum/showthread.php?18990-Elfrog-s-Journal-Day-2/page2

My intention when I overwrite my porn habit with better ones, is to start exploring Taoist and Yogic ideas of orgasm without ejaculation (google multi-orgasmic man). This will also require training. Idea being a) be better lover and b) as many of us are doing here, not to waste Ki/Chi with over-frequent ejaculation. This is an Eastern perspective though and not something everyone would agree with...

 

"which wolf wins? the one you feed!"

like this story. i started watching porn excessive with 25 years (nearly 12 years now).

before the addiction i had no problems with masturbation. once in a month (with or without porn) was my average. that was normal for me. there was no compulsion to do it. i lost control.

like i said before it will be very hard to seperate porn and masturbation - maybe impossible.

i want to leave the porn-fantasy-world forever! i want to live real and feel real.