10,000 hours

Discussion in 'Abstinence, Retention, and Sexual Transmutation' started by narf, Dec 28, 2018.

  1. narf

    narf Fapstronaut

    I recently read Malcolm Gladwell's book Outliers, which mentions the 10,000 hour rule, in which one can have mastered a skill after 10,000 hours of practice.

    After another, out-of-the-blue collapse back into pornography, I've realised that both masturbation and pornography mean little to me, despite their insistent pleas. I realised that if there was a way to be free of both, without missing them, I would straight up do it.

    90 days wasn't enough, neither was 250+. And I think part of it was my growing lack of faith that I'd actually ever NOT NEED pornography and masturbation again. There was still a degree of uncertainty in the great void beyond 90 days.

    At some point in the recent past I managed to break the habit of biting my nails, a life-long habit. I broke it about 4 years ago, through willpower and work. It must have been at way past 10,000 hours since I last bit my nails, and I can say without a shadow of a doubt that I will NEVER bite them again. And that is after maybe 18-20 years of chronic nail biting.

    So, surely I can become a master of not requiring the learnt pleasures of masturbation and porn. Porn, I know, is the big no-no. Yet I've still been half-decided about masturbation. And that, I believe, is what has been my personal downfall back into both. They are too closely connected for me and my past, and the lack of a solid path has been treacherous. It seems I need solid rules to keep rules.

    So, with this new mindset, the idea that I could possibly not even need to consider these things in the future, just like my nail-biting, I think it's worth the effort. And for me, 10,000 hours (417 days) is nothing with a goal that strong. When I first began NoFap, 90 days was my mission and I hit it first time, because I believed I'd be cured. I wasn't, obviously, but the willpower and the belief that the famous 90 day milestone could better me was enough for me at the time.

    I've not had such a solid milestone since, only self-imposed ones, which have left me feeling helpless and unmotivated. For me, 417 days is the new 90 days. I actually feel a degree of excitement at this possibility, something I haven't felt since I first began NF, and I believe that once more it will carry me through.

    I'm resetting and I'm not returning to NF until I've completed this streak.

    *I've decided to round it up to 420 days for two reasons: it will help me feel like I've 'sealed the deal'; it's easily divisible into 60 clear-cut weeks, which will help with tracking.
    Last edited: Dec 28, 2018
  2. Davidphd1866

    Davidphd1866 Fapstronaut

    I’ve read a number of Malcolm Gladwell’s books. I think you are on to something with the 10,000 hours. I may try to copy you.
    Andreaw likes this.
  3. AllNamesUsed

    AllNamesUsed Fapstronaut

    You forgot one reason
  4. Andreaw

    Andreaw Fapstronaut

    Hello my goal is a year, 52 weeks but then of course, the aim is to stop falling back on it, it's just the first step, to continue forever.
    this thing of the 10k hours, I've already heard it, but it was related to a job, bag charts, and it's very true, I did not know that you could also use it to heal from an addiction.
    I also know that to get used to, an addiction takes 21 days.

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