too hard to make out, still 1 more day...but at the last nothing comes free & when something is worthy it's not easy to achieve..hope this journey ends soon...even if i don't look at porn imaginative thoughts are always playing in mind just looking for ways to cop up with that stuff inside brain
the more the day pass...the more the benefit rises but also more the risk of relapsing arises....afterall nothing comes free not even the reboot of our own life by our own hand...every single day is contributing their part in reaching the goal...hope i don't fail this time after coming so far...day 13/out of 1.2 years
82/1387 As I wrote in the 90 day challenge it's been several days since checking in. That's due to my life becoming far more productive and focused. I wanted to share something as I draw close to the 90 days in hard mode. When I started I wasn't so much daunted by the thought of not masturbating for 90 days than by not knowing just how feasible and possible that was for myself. I write this as a recommendation to for that challenge - 90 days and hard mode. It's really allowed me to take the journey of re-wiring to change my behavior and thought patterns. I don't see myself as "getting back to" a place but rather "moving forward to" somewhere I've never been. Porn came into my life early at 10 years of age. 50+ years ago it was much different than now of course but I accept what a profound influence it had on me with the back drop of a dysfunctional family. I'm headed somewhere new that quite frankly I don't know what's like but at least have a vision for how I want to be and feel. At this stage I know that the 90 days will simply be a milestone on a long journey. When I started I figured 90 days might be a capstone but now I realize it's an important FIRST step for becoming who I want to be, how I want to be and to really be the person I'd like people to see me as. As I say in many other posts I know that there are still challenges. I'm not nearly clear or clean yet because of what distractions try to enter my mind and how I let them dwell at times. What I know is that I do have the capacity to control it and not let them drive deeply into creating obsessive urges. Practice makes perfect. I'm not perfect - I'm still practicing.
I will participate in this challenge, and have to complete 10% of three years = 110 days. I'm now at Day 0/110: unfortunately I relapsed this morning. My best streak ever is 16 days and I'm a new Fapstronaut, by the way... Good luck to everyone!
Day 14...cant say what progress i have made sexually but still somewhere feeling good till now...hope i found through nofappping what i lost while fapping...that's me...the real me...
