10 SuperPowers I gained from Quitting Porn(10 year anniversary)

Discussion in 'Success Stories' started by ChrisHaven, Oct 24, 2016.

  1. ChrisHaven

    ChrisHaven Fapstronaut

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    Ever wondered what almost 10 years off pornography and masturbation looks and feels like?

    Next month(November) will mark my 10th year off PMO.

    I tell people that being addicted to porn is one of the best things that could ever have happened to them. Countless great men had hidden addictions- a lot of them were sex related. Most of them harnessed them and used them to reach the greatest heights in their fields. Some changed the world. One of the dirty secrets of the most successful is that they have addictions for which they CHOOSE not to get diagnosed- they know very well what propels their success.

    This post neither condones nor condemns the habits and addictions of the successful. I'm just laying out some of the things that have happened to me- not all may be "good" for everyone.I hope this inspires some of you who may be feel frustrated with the journey.

    Here are handful of high achievers(more famous/prominent than the thousands of highly sexed achievers in the world today), who, when not having more sex than the average man, were changing the world or excelling and breaking boundaries in their respective fields.

    Arnold Schwartzenegger: Extremely high sex drive- possibly sex addiction.Was notorious for sleeping with hundreds of women. After his marriage to Maria Shriver, he continued having sex with multiple women outside of his relationship, culminating in having a child with his housekeeper. This is a man who came to the United States of America as a penniless immigrant, dominated in this field, became a millionaire before he made his first movie through his mail order and real estate businesses, became a top box office draw despite his thick Austrian accent, became the governor of California and now in his 60’s still pumps out movies, maintains an amazing physique and constantly creates new businesses.

    Martin Luther King: A great civil rights leader, but what is less known about him was his penchant for sleeping with women outside of his marriage.On a regular basis. It is common knowledge that during his tour of Europe with his entourage, they frequently engaged in group sex with white women.

    Mahatma Gandhi: When Gandhi embarked on his mission to free India from colonialism,he became celibate. He probably knew about the power of sexual transmutation. What is less known are his practices of testing his resilience to sexual arousal. It was reported that he would have young women sleep naked next to him to test his ability to withstand arousal. Gandhi had planned to write about these experiments, but was prevented from doing so by his entourage.

    Tiger Woods: Need I say more? It is no coincidence that men of great drive and ambition also have sex drives high enough to channel into amazing achievements. From my study of Tiger Woods, I don't believe he had "sex addiction", but he definitely had an enormous sex drive which could be channeled into his sport.

    I guarantee you that if high speed streaming online pornography was available to half these men, many of them would not have impacted the world the way they did.

    Till today, I still get weird looks and awkward silences when I mention to friends, acquaintances or even clients that I don’t watch porn or masturbate.

    It seems so absurd to them.

    I have a dirty little secret though:

    I feel superior to everyone else.
    What does this mean? It means, I experience a sense of overwhelming confidence and superiority to other men because I know I’m doing something which they cannot, or are not committed or self disciplined enough to do.

    This feeling grows every single year and quite honestly, it has made me a much happier person.

    You can experience that feeling too.

    Apart from super-confidence, there are a lot of other amazing things that have happened in my life since I gave up pornography. Most took a few years to develop while some appeared in a matter of weeks.

    Here are 10 “Super Powers” I gained from quitting porn.

    1) I became happier: Ridiculously happier. I used to be so depressed, angry and reactive while I was on pornography. I constantly felt sorry for myself and has a terrible “woe is me” little bitch attitude going on.
    Now I feel a constant baseline happiness or rather, JOY flowing through me daily. Of course, I still have bad days and challenges are always showing up in my life.
    The difference is that when I “check-in” with myself, the joy is always there.

    2) I became financially independent: I don’t talk much about money on this forum-there are plenty of resources for that, but surveys have show that most guys stuck on PMO are in bad financial situations- especially the men who use cam sites and prostitutes. I spent a lot of money on porn, alcohol, weed, and other bad habits when I was addicted.I never seemed to be able to hold on to money, had no idea how to budget or balance a check book , had credit card debt and my back account was always overdrawn.
    Having a shitty budget and financial problems always comes hand in hand with porn addiction.Sure, there are well off men whose net worth and income is high enough to not be dented by their addiction, but its only a matter of time before the problem escalates financially.
    It took a few years to build this super power, but I became obsessed with three things:
    a) Increasing my earning potential by learning highly marketable skills
    b) Saving
    c) Investing
    Of these three, saving had been the single most effective means of increasing my “money superpower”. I became a saving fanatic. Not for the sake of saving, but for the rush I would get each time I would look at my saving account and watch the balance grow. Saving at a ridiculous rate allowed me to have money to invest when opportunities came my way. The discipline of saving allowed me to be cautious and always research an opportunity thoroughly before committing to it financially. I wanted wealth- for one simple reason: freedom. I wanted to live wherever I could, and not have to answer to anyone- ever.

    3) My standards improved: During the years I was hooked on pornography, my sex life was dismal. It slowly improved as I dedicated time to learning how to meet and attract women.The women I had sex with during this time were either unattractive, or had serious personal issues. Some were bipolar, many more were very promiscuous. As time went by, and my experience with women increased, I became very picky about the women I dated and had casual sex with.
    This eliminated drama from my life and I surrounded myself with only quality women. Of course, when I was stuck on porn, “quality” was only determined by looks. Now, there are very strict criteria for women in my life.

    4) I developed self discipline: Quitting porn will teach you how to restrain your actions. It will teach you how to train your impulsive instincts and choose rational actions all the time.
    Self discipline set me apart from everyone around me and it will do the same for you. I hate sleeping 4-5 hours a night. I hate working 80 hours a week. I hate studying endless scholarly journals and research on the effects of pornography and sex addiction. But every morning, I wake up to a dark sky at 4am, workout, go for a run, meditate, visualize, write my goals out, read for an hour and sit down at my laptop to work. Every single day without fail.

    5) I became a sex machine: This is one “super power” that I am still currently researching. Like most men who were addicted to porn, when I resumed having regular sex, I experienced embarrassing issues with porn induced erectile dysfunction.
    However, I kept on having sex, while working on it. Maybe my brain rewired itself differently, maybe its the endless kegel variations I perform daily, but I can on occasion, ejaculate on command and in every sexual situation, except if I am extremely exhausted, ejaculate multiple times- my record being sixteen times in one session(without the help of any drugs).

    6) I lost my Anxiety: Everyone is born with anxiety. The difference between people with seemingly low anxiety and people with a lot of anxiety is their awareness of their anxiety and whether they have a positive or negative history with anxiety.I personally suffered from crippling social anxiety and porn made it infinitely worse. There were months where I was literally a hermit.
    While I took deliberate steps to overcome my anxiety, quitting porn and masturbation literally made me horny enough to talk to women. There were days when I was so aroused, that I would meet women in the day and try to bring them home with me( key word is "try) . It was a while until I was able to pull this off successfully, but once I did and learned how to do so consistently, my self confidence soared.

    7) I found purpose:
    I’ve never been a fan of the airy-fairy bullshit promoted by self-help gurus that you need to find your “passion and purpose”. If everyone found their passion, there would be no one to pick up our garbage, serve us food, clean the streets and offices, or make iphones in China and designer clothes in a sweatshop in Bangladesh.
    Purpose and passion are luxuries. Quitting porn will give you the freedom to DECIDE what you want as your purpose. You can literally pick any field of work, find good enough logical reason to pursue it, and channel your energy into it. Quitting porn taught me that ACTION CREATES MOTIVATION.
    You may read this article and get motivated, but make no mistake- the action you will take after the article is what will fuel the motivation for the long term. As the weeks of my recovery from pornography turned into months, and the super powers became more obvious, I became motivated to reveal more of these powers. My action was propelling me forward. My action was making me passionate. My action revealed a new purpose, which was becoming the best person I could become- something I always WISHED for but was never driven enough to accomplish.

    8) I became stronger:
    Not just stronger, but more aggressive. I learned how to channel the now higher levels of testosterone I had allowed into my body into emotion. Sometimes the emotion was rage, sometimes it was desire and sometimes it was joy. Whichever it was, I was a beast in the gym and I realized that the energy that made me act out and watch porn no matter the cost. That formula of trigger-adrenaline spike-emotion could be channeled into building my physical strength.
    I remember guys in the gym stronger than me wondering how I was so strong even though I didn’t have as much muscle mass as they did.

    9) I stopped giving a fuck:
    Once I became stronger, created a purpose for myself, mastered my anxiety, started making more money than I had ever made in my life, became a born again sex machine, and stopped having sex with women below my looks and attitude threshold, I automatically unlocked the” don’t give a fuck” super power.
    So what exactly is not giving a fuck? Well, it not bravado- false bravery. Its reaching a state in your life where you’ve decided to achieve certain things or DIE. I knew that if I didn’t quit porn, I might as well be dead. Confidence is gained by beating your craving for porn thousands of times.I built up enough skills and superpowers to have the INNATE confidence that I could handle anything that life threw at me. I had paid the price- and I am still paying the price to stand among MEN
    When I started writing about quitting porn, some of my friends though I was insane to talk about porn addiction- especially mine. They thought I was crazy to do “internet stuff like blogging”. When I sold my shares in the sales training company I was involved in to focus on helping men quit pornography full time, my entire family was sure I had gone nuts.
    I didn’t care. Quitting pornography gave me access to the only things that mattered in life-why would I care about what the world thinks?

    10) I became capable of loving: This was the most painful and powerful of all the superpowers.
    As the years flew by, I began to see how my porn use had closed me off to others. I wore a thick armor around my emotions to protect me from being hurt. I thought it made me a badass.
    I was wrong. Deep inside all men is the power to love- to care for other beings unconditionally. This is the most misunderstood superpower of all. “Love” is a word thrown around callously. Quitting porn allowed me- for brief moments, at least- to empathize more deeply with the pain than other human beings felt.
    When I was addicted to porn, I didn’t care about the people on the screen engaging in porn- all I cared was that it got me off.
    If you’ve ever wondered how a human being can violently rape and kill another human, look no further that the mirror. Pornography is systematically desensitizing you to critical parts of your biology which promote bonding, family and healthy social interactions. It is hyper-sensitizing the parts of your brain which respond to violence and sexual violence.
    To truly be a man, you need to be able to balance both the dark and the light in your life.

    As the years go by perhaps I will uncover more “super powers”, but for now I say with much confidence that my addiction pornography was a blessing in disguise.

    What are some of the “super powers” you have gained from quitting porn?
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Nov 3, 2016
  2. Ochanomizu

    Ochanomizu Fapstronaut

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    Thanks for the share, Chris! Glad to hear your record and that you are doing well.

    Am currently on day 5 of my PMO, so I may be slightly optimistic, the differences do feel real to me though. They also come with other changes in my personal lifestyle and habits (such as a regular amount of sleep and improved diet), so that may contribute to it as well.

    - Improved energy and drive:
    PMO has a similar effect to a warm shower in that it helps you to relax, and makes you feel as if you have "done something", making you more passive and less driven in other areas of your life. I have more energy now throughout the day, and I guess that's why the other thread advocates cold showers (which are pretty awesome by the way, although I only do so in the morning!)

    - Reduced objectification of women: While I do have wayward thoughts sometimes, I find that they are far less than they used to be. I no longer look at women and wonder what it would be like to you know what, and I have newfound respect for and can have more intimate platonic relationships with them.

    - Improved confidence, sense of self and appreciation for women: This is similar to the above, but different. Before, I used to shy away from making eye contact with women, however, recently I lift my head high and I do catch and hold the eyes of more women than before, without me needing to shy away maybe due to guilt. I haven't smiled yet because I do not want to lead them on, but I guess it wouldn't really hurt. Before, I also suffered a severe case of one-itis according to a buddy of mine, where I only had eyes for one girl and placed her on a pedestal, exhibiting "nice-guy syndrome" which contributed to the failure of our relationship. However, I now have no apologies for who I am (although I still want to treat others nicely and generally do the right thing, of course), and I now mind my own business and criticise others less, making me much happier. Moreover, today I noticed that there were actually a lot of beautiful women around, not in a sexual way, but they were cute, or had a great smile, or dressed well, or would be good girlfriend material. I never noticed how beautiful women were before, beautiful as humans. It definitely feels great.

    All the best to everyone! :)
     
    Cyborg1, Santi123, molotrap and 12 others like this.
  3. The human failure

    The human failure Fapstronaut

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    Sex can't possibly be that good. It looks disgusting to me, so many germs and bacteria and ew. People pee from there yanno?

    Wait what am I even doing here I'm not successful at Nofap xD
     
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  4. Lunar Devil

    Lunar Devil Fapstronaut

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    Shut up man, you're day 5, that doesn't even count...there are no benefits on day 5, you're not on nofap, you're catching your breath still.

    ChrisHaven, are you REALLY on 10years? Why doesn't this threat have more attention? Are you christian or something? How's your memory and spatial skills? Do you workout at least...besides the morning run, forget cardio, do you engage in real exercise?
     
  5. Phoenix11

    Phoenix11 Fapstronaut

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    Chris Haven. Thanks for sharing your story. It's very inspiring. I believe in the superpowers and look forward to having them in my life.
     
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  6. NickT58

    NickT58 Fapstronaut

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    I felt real benefits on day 5 too, you sound spiteful. Congrats on 5 days ochanomizu!
     
  7. Fork2323

    Fork2323 Fapstronaut

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    Im a beliebber
     
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  8. nrque

    nrque Fapstronaut

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    Thanks for this post mate. :)
     
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  9. Rtaylor

    Rtaylor Fapstronaut

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    Congrats on day 5! It's still an achievement, keep going though.

     
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  10. SyrusDrake

    SyrusDrake Fapstronaut

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    Thank you for your post. It's not only interesting and encouraging but it also mentions a few points I've read about before and have questions or doubts about. I hope you (or someone else) can maybe help me with them.

    I haven't felt that myself yet but I can definitely see how it almost inevitably happens. However, it scares me a lot. I scared of being arrogant, almost to a degree of phobia. If noFap makes me feel "superior to everyone else", that would actually be a very, very strong argument against it.
    Humility is a virtue and being able to see that you there's a flaw in your actions or ideas is actually a key requirement for my future career.

    This is definitely a benefit for you. But what if one can't afford to be picky? "Beggars can't be choosers", as they say. Wouldn't increased standards make life even more difficult for people who already find it difficult or impossible to connect romantically and sexually with women?

    This is another one that scares me. Horniness should be the last of all the many reasons to talk to a woman. If I reach that level, I'm nothing more than a creepy pervert who wants nothing but to get into a girl's pants...
    This is actually one of the reasons why I masturbated to begin with. So my social actions and interactions would never be controlled by my sexual urges.

    How would you address these issues I listed?
     
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  11. iamdonewithfapping

    iamdonewithfapping Fapstronaut

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    Haven't gone further than 3 weeks
     
  12. ChrisHaven

    ChrisHaven Fapstronaut

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    Yes. This month will mark 10 years. You can also follow my history in the forums for the past three years, I believe and on my site ( I won't advertise here our of respect to the admin, as they disabled my signature)

    -I'm not christian- in fact I am non religious.
    -Memory- good question- not sure how it relates to my post.I haven't really thought about it, but I have problems remembering details of intimate conversations- particularly with women. I've always attributed this to running multiple businesses and not placing much emphasis to minute details in intimate relationships. That or women just remeber details better. Apart from that, I believe my memory is excellent.
    - I lift weights daily, hot yoga twice a week, muay thai(thai kickboxing) once a week.
     
    Espi1971 and (deleted member) like this.
  13. ChrisHaven

    ChrisHaven Fapstronaut

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  14. ChrisHaven

    ChrisHaven Fapstronaut

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    I responded in the quotes above.
     
  15. SyrusDrake

    SyrusDrake Fapstronaut

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    Wow, thanks a lot for your detailed and helpful reply! Didn't expect you to go through such lengths 0o

    On humility and superiority: The problem I have with superiority, regardless of ego, is that once you feel superior, you're silently assuming that nobody can teach you anything anymore, regarding the field in question. And especially in academia, that would be dangerous.
    But I think we're more discussing semantics here. I see where you're coming from and while I don't think I can apply that mindset (yet?), it's giving me a better understanding of the idea. I don't want to condemn humility outright but seeing your perspective makes it easier for me to home in on the level of confidence I want to reach.

    On being worthy of women: There are things about myself that I either can't or don't want to change that mean I probably will remain a beggar. But this is not a place to discuss this, so let's leave it at that. Again, I can see where you're coming from though and do hear that you were able to overcome that barrier is motivating.

    On sexuality: This would be an interesting discussion. On how acceptable it is to express sexual interest in a woman and how it depends on culture and society. Because I think it would be far less acceptable here where I live than it is in the US. But again, this isn't the right place for that.
    As for me having issues with sexual shame...yes, now you mention it, you're probably right. Although I would argue that they're generally more the cause for my porn and masturbation addiction rather than a symptom. I would love to figure out how I got it to this point and how I can overcome it. Though it's difficult since actual sexuality (as opposed to just...flashing tits on afternoon TV, which is completely accepted) is still a pretty big taboo around here...

    Again, thanks a lot for your reply. Keep in mind, just because I don't fully agree with you doesn't mean I don't value your input. It's an important piece in the puzzle of my mind.
     
    EDnJM likes this.
  16. snowman_pj

    snowman_pj Fapstronaut

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    Thanks for sharing. It means so much to me. All the best!
     
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  17. Quints

    Quints Fapstronaut

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    Thanks for sharing man, this is really inspirational stuff, stuff that I think everyone here is striving for including myself
     
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  18. Pursuit__Of__Happiness

    Pursuit__Of__Happiness Fapstronaut

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    Very powerful, motivating and touching. One of the most interesting, insightful posts, I have ever read here, though, on some things you mentioned, I would have a different take. But, still overall, very beautiful and really it pumped me up. And, yes I will remember your advice on taking actions. By the way, congratulations on being FREE for a decade and also appreciate for taking so much pain in writing such a wonderful post.

    One very apt quote for this moment-

    "Excellence is an art won by training and habituation. We do not act rightly because we have virtue or excellence, but we rather have those because we have acted rightly. We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act but a habit." - ARISTOTLE
     
  19. Denzel889

    Denzel889 Fapstronaut

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    That's the best article I've ever read. Thank you so much. Now I see that I am on completely correct path. Thanks man
     
    Espi1971 likes this.
  20. Coffeewouldbenice

    Coffeewouldbenice Fapstronaut

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    Lol you're not very positive huh. Everyone starts at day 1, being on day 5 could mean the world for some people. Who are you to judge?
    Ive been on nofap for around 1.5 years now and here i am on day 2.

    @Lunar Devil .
     

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