100 Cold Approaches

I did one today in the city

I approached a girl and asked her for a public toilet.
“ hey I need to do a really big dump can you point me to a toilet?”
“ she said no I have no clue, perhaps you better do it in the bushes behind you”
“ Good idea, will you join me to hand over some leaves please?”
“ sure do you want me to wipe it off as well”
“ no that’s ok but you can spit on them, wet wipes better”
“ true I usually spit in the palm of my hand for the final wipe”
“ haha really so do I, I learned it from my dog”
“ yes we can all learn a lot from dogs”
“ yes absolutely, apparently they can sniff out diseases you might carry around”
“ certainly my dog kept sniffing my toes”
“ maybe the dog had a feet fetish?”
“ no he just liked my toe cheese!”
“ well so do I perhaps I can replace your dog once he dies”
“ oh yeah that would be awesome, I kinda wanted to replace my furry friend with a human bean”
“I will be that bean” I said.
“ So do you still need to take that massive shit” she asked
“ Certainly certainly, in fact it is running down my leg as we speak”
“ aww so cute, just follow me to my apartment so you can have a hot shower”
“ ok thanks and hey can I get your number?”
“ no you are completely disgusting now get lost you creep”
The end

 

I remember I read this thread from approach 1 to 100 in one sit. Very entertaining. This approach I made it past weekend

The flexible lawyer
I was at the gym the past weekend doing some movement practice. There were some people in the room not too many.

I started moving doing backbends, contortions, ballet moves, everything was improvised. It's a way for me to relax, decompress and express myself.

A girl arrived at the room, I noticed she looked intensely at me. She was cute, good body and 25 y.o.

After a while, almost everyone was gone except the two of us and she approached me and asked me what was I doing. I told her I was doing some movement practice. Then I explained a bit about it, she told me she used to do cheerleading and found cool what I was doing. She showed me some of her flexibility, she is extremely flexible, we talked a bit about her job, I was interested she's a lawyer for some of the most famous or the most famous instagramer in my country. Almost all the talk was about her. I just let her talk at some point I asked her number.

Later we talked on the phone we have similar interests like meditation, yoga, tantra, lucid dreaming.
First time in my life I find a girl who likes these things and I find attractive and she's not weird. I set up a date with her next week.

Also I wasn't even planning to train, it just happens I passed by the gym after doing some errands and thought why not moving a little.

Conclusion: I think this is one of the moments one has not to let go, if you notice a girl looks at you and also is the one that starts the approach, you have to go for it. I wasn't even thinking on hitting any girl I was just focused training, but one has to always be aware opportunities take place sometimes in the least expected moments.

 

3/100

Soo, I saw my favourite local (nationwide) actress today but was too embarrassed and shy to say anything- we were walking in opposite directions and she held her phone and coffee in both hands, while intensively typing something - i felt if I interrupt, she would drop her phone, coffee or both!

10 minutes later, I was running some errands today and I went to a toll booth to pay a tax. Three ladies were there, one in her 50ies caught my eye as she looked interesting. I wasn't planning on resuming cold approaches, as I'm not in a good place right now, but the lady had a massive ring on her finger (towering over the adjacent fingers she had it on) and I had to compliment her on that.
She said thanks and that she appreciates it deeply, cause she made it herself.
I instantly asked if she keeps making jewellery (in line to prep for getting her contacts), but she said not so much lately and that dried out the conversation, as I already had payed my tax and had no further reason to stay there.

 

Not adding number 4 yet, but something interesting happened.

It seems I've become addicted to...how to say, environmental approaches? Like, you're both there for a reason (like with the tax lady). Do they still count as cold approaches? I would reckon they do.

Last night I was out with a girl friend and we went for cappuccinos - one of the two baristas had an interesting tattoo on her arm and I was a whisker away from starting a conversation on that - only thing that stopped me was the fact that it would look extremely bad if I'm with someone (even a friend) and I start randomly talking to the barista - and I don't want to leave a bad impression of me being a sleezebag.

But it is interesting how much confidence I've gathered and how I've grown to be quite social.
Looking forward to see what kind of stories I end up writing on here.

 

It's cool how connections can be created quite easily and organically sometimes. We often overthink it, or avoid it, but a small environmental conversation is one of the best ice breakers.

I like the idea of opening directly and showing interest right away, but this can backfire if there's absolutely no common connections, and it's a bit intimidating to do this every time. Finding something in the immediate environment to chat about first, then see if there's any connection, may be better most of the time.

Best of luck with your next approaches!

 

Can I add a tip?
I've only done direct approaches with girls I recall one time in a pub I approached a girl in a group of 11 friends (all females) I just told her in the ear straight "you look pretty" after that she became engaged to me and I found out she was the leader of the group of girls (which was a volleyball team)....
All of the girls were engaged to me as a consequence, she wanted to sleep with me in a hotel but I rejected because she told me she was in a relationship ....

I've told you this just to say that in a group of girl if you find the alpha female (there is always one in a group) i guess that should be your target and if you're lucky enough to get engaged with her you'll automatically become attractive to all the others in the group... also creating a friendship with a group of girls it's a huge opportunity to understand their mindset and improve your skill...

Oh btw
It's ok to have confidence but in my opinion looks matter above everything else, women seek perfection in a man ... you gotta pay extremely attention to your looks before approaching women, good looking females will scan you from the type of shoes you are wearing to the amount of ungroomed hairs you have on your eyebrows....
Women seek to be with the top 20% of attractive males and they tend to reject the other 80%...
I guess you are average or slightly average looking guy, I guess from reading your messages, you gotta work extremely on your appeareance to get in the top 20%... once you're in there you'll even start getting approached by confident women.
I hope I'll be listened and that you'll have more success

 

I'd just like to say, as a show of thanks and appreciation, this thread has really brightened my day and it has inspired some confidence in me to go out there and do it for myself.

It's also lead me on to Todd V Dating on YouTube, so I'm now fascinated by this sub-culture of cold approach dating and picking up women and how much of it can be geared towards building self-confidence and character. It's not to say that I want to sleep with 100's of women, but I think a large part of my personal misery comes from a general lack of interactions with people, especially the opposite sex, and a reason why I continually fall back into the easy life of pornography and webcam girls.

Ergo... by opening up this way and taking risks, pushing the boundaries and stepping outside of my comfort zone, I think I will reap some mega rewards from it! It's given me tonnes of confidence just reading through many of these posts, understanding this is a truly ubiquitous scenario and that you only ascend if you start showing up. I've still got some catching up to do, but especially SC and Kowe I've really enjoyed reading through their experiences, their bravery and their transparency! Visualizing the humdrum, mundane nature of your interactions gave me such familiarity and made me see that it's not always a movie scene when approaching a girl, and oftentimes we need to break through many layers of failing and failing again to craft the best approach.

If I have any experiences or success stories I will post here. Best of luck to anyone still on the prowl

 

Todd V, haha. What a creepster. He looks so sad and somber, as if under a dark cloud.

Forget all that. Dude, you need fitness. Get strong and make money. Women will come, trust me.

 

Feedback fully appreciated. I've had one of those desperate days I suppose.

It's funny you say that, I did start to notice his general grey aura after I while...

It is rather simple isn't it. Thanks for your stark wisdom

 

I think Todd appears to have a bit of burn out, like he works on this stuff all the time and just doesn't have the passion for it. Seeing some of his approaches he comes off a bit uninvested, which ironically can sometimes make a girl more interested when the guy clearly isn't over invested in her...

Anyways, I think he has great advice but is not a total blueprint to copy - cold approaches work best when we do our own thing!

@LOSEmyselftoSAVEmyself Agree fitness, income, basically being on a mission is paramount. The foundation if you will. But you still mostly need to make the first move to meet women, many guys read the 'women will come when successful' advice and think women will approach them they just have to wait.

@sjd.108 Your post of motivation motivated me in return dude. Ubiquitous indeed - "you miss 100% of the shots you don't make." I'll match your commitment and post back here if and when I get out of my own way and make some progress here!

 

Yes, it's important to tailor it to to your own character and let it be something meaningful to you. I had a lot of fun talking on the train with Abigail and I also had a follow up moment with her on social media. Will likely get to see her again in September when I visit her hometown.

 

I remember this thread when I just joined nofap. I almost feel tempted to do my owm 100 cold approaches and post it here.

Right now I'm very busy do, I had my fair share of cold approaches this year and fairly successful, I would like to do more I don't spend too much time outside, usually only in the gym where I used to think cold approaching was impossible but after two times doing it, it became easy and the next times I did it without effort. I could say I'm almost an expert cold approaching at the gym it has kinda lost its interest in me.

I approach like if the girl is a regular girl, in a friendly way and sex is not remotely in my head, I'm just talking to another human being not expecting anything and when the moment is right I just go for the number.

What I haven't done is cold approaching in the streets or in a different environment than the gym.

But then again I spend most of my time right now at home and the gym. So no many opportunities.

But I'll do it some time. I think is the only thing I haven't done in regards to game and dating.

But I think I'll do the same approach I do at the gym in the streets outcome independent and just talking to another person without sex in my head, but if I notice she wants to get physical or something more right there, it could happen, I'll be ready for it too.

 

Look my friend, it's easy.

All you gotta do is complete a 90 day hard mode reboot.

Hit the gym, cut the calories.

At the end of the reboot, you will see a girl who wants to talk to you.

Smile and be yourself. Don't think anymore into it.

 

Dude, the approach is your life success.

When you succeed with life, joy will be beaming from you.

Confidence will be natural. You don't have to learn it.

Smile and say hi. Be yourself, that's all you need to do.

 

You're right things do eventually fall in place with enough work.

I won't comment too much because I think I'm currently going through a flatline that's lasted a few weeks. Not real depressed but not that excited about anything in particular either. I notice women but don't feel like I'm missing out.

I read on YBOP that connecting and if possible having sex really does help 'rewire' and can be necessary to get out of that autopilot mode where we are indifferent about sexual interest...

Maybe a few fun approaches would get one out of the flatline if they are otherwise progressing and kicking goals in life...?

 

4/100

So I've been getting coffee or water bottles from a shop nearby and yesterday one of the cashiers looked extremely cheery, so unlike me, I decided to initiate a conversation.

Me: How are you today?
Her: Very good! You?
Me: Good. Just about to go to the gym.
Her: The [name A] one?
Me: No, I'm going to [name B], as it's also pretty close.

Then we wished each other a nice day and that was about it - not very groundbreaking or anything, but still, I'm gonna introduce myself next time, so we also know each other by name.
(Until then I have time to think about some nice conversational starter to ask her.)

 

My suggestion is that if you are flatlined, stay in it.

Because that is usually a symptom of getting stuff done, lack of anxiety.

Keep working on your goals, avoid distractions like women.

Maybe real sex "rewires" the brain, but nothing heals it better than a hard mode reboot.

In 90 days, you could have built wealth, a good life, a strong/fit body,
and trust me, real sex is going to find you, you won't need no approaching lingo.

 

Thanks for the advice man! Really helps as I am in the best reboot attempt in some time but also feeling a bit jaded.

I got distracted with online dating for a week (deleted now) and also browsed paid sex for a few days (stopped that too). I got desperate with these 2 because I was so determined to not do porn no matter what. But luckily I did not use these things to edge.

Sometimes I feel like approaching women but know I'm not quite there yet.

Never been to 90+ so I would like to at least get there, and you're on point zero distractions is just so much easier!