Didnt kiss. I feel like thats too personal if you get me? I dont feel much with her except that I am attracted to her. I dont want to stumble into a serious relationship.
100 Cold Approaches
- Thread starter StoicContemplation
- Start date
Spa35
Fapstronaut
I was doing cold approaches daily asking at least 1 girl out, the hottest I would see part of a personal mentorship in a conservative country. It was super hard to get #'s and not common for that method there however it was an interesting and a new experience to become self aware of my inner brain working against me and my potential.
12/100
Todays approaches were mostly night approaches and I dont put them in as high regard as approaching people on the street. I had over 10 approaches. Lost count but many of them were really bad. My opening move was mostly "hi, wassup?" and just entering right into the group. I was socially violating a bit but got away with it. I was blown out a lot because the girls could smell my intentions from miles away. I was like a hopeless sex addict strolling around there. Out of my maybe 25 approaches (25 sets, maybe 50 people) only a few went anywhere. It started with strong eye contact with a french girl at the preparty. She was seated quite far away from me and surrounded by dudes so it wasnt too easy. My eye contact alone made her check me out and give me smiles. I kinda knew we had something there. We ended up seated next to each other at the party. My opening line was lame but I didnt care: -So how is France, is it nice? She replied " yea, France is perfect" -how is the weather down there compared to here? "29 degrees all the time" -All the bloody time? Thats too hot.
I dont remember the conversation from there. We were sitting quite close without breaking eye contact for a while. She told me she just landed with her flight from France today to which I replied that I wouldnt have the energy to party after a flight. She told me she was pretty tired. We got interrupted by another dude hitting on her. She seemed dissapointed I didnt try harder with her and left the whole party.
Hit it off even better with a girl I recognized from chemistry class. We realized we had been in the same room during all exams. We both had extra time during tests. I joked something along the lines of " we are in disabled people class together". Probably not what I said. It sounded better then. We connected over that. She told me she has dyslexia. I shared that I have neck pain which makes it hard to focus and get stuff done. She carried the conversation. I realized she was really smart. I just kept eye contact and pretended to understand half of what she was saying. Didnt break eye contact for a good 15 minutes. The approach itself was special. She was sitting on the ground outside when I approached her, so I sat down with her. Could have been pretty awkward but it wasnt. Our knees touched, had my arm on her shoulder. Our faces close enough to kiss. I was a little bit entranced by her eyes and mouth. She was quite pretty, especially her face. She talked a little about how she felt dumb compared to her class. I told her that the requirement to get into here was like 5.8 while the national average is 4. The highest score is a 6.That means that everyone in class is way above average smart. We compare ourselves to our classmates but compared to the world we are easily in the top 5%. She agreed to that and we were quite into our conversation. Then her friends showed up and dragged her away to some after party which sucked.
At the end of the night I started talking to a girl from the Netherlands. I dont remember much of the conversation but we talked for a while. I mistakenly assumed she was Spanish when she started talking English to me and we talked about language a little, some about family and about knitting I think. And how much she didnt want to go home because all her friends were partying there. Then the place closed and I was kicked out by the bouncer.
Oh btw, I got laid yesterday! It was just okay. Didnt get off. I dont think I am that attracted to her. She wants to meet once a week or so. I get the feeling she might be a little clingy.
Todays approaches were mostly night approaches and I dont put them in as high regard as approaching people on the street. I had over 10 approaches. Lost count but many of them were really bad. My opening move was mostly "hi, wassup?" and just entering right into the group. I was socially violating a bit but got away with it. I was blown out a lot because the girls could smell my intentions from miles away. I was like a hopeless sex addict strolling around there. Out of my maybe 25 approaches (25 sets, maybe 50 people) only a few went anywhere. It started with strong eye contact with a french girl at the preparty. She was seated quite far away from me and surrounded by dudes so it wasnt too easy. My eye contact alone made her check me out and give me smiles. I kinda knew we had something there. We ended up seated next to each other at the party. My opening line was lame but I didnt care: -So how is France, is it nice? She replied " yea, France is perfect" -how is the weather down there compared to here? "29 degrees all the time" -All the bloody time? Thats too hot.
I dont remember the conversation from there. We were sitting quite close without breaking eye contact for a while. She told me she just landed with her flight from France today to which I replied that I wouldnt have the energy to party after a flight. She told me she was pretty tired. We got interrupted by another dude hitting on her. She seemed dissapointed I didnt try harder with her and left the whole party.
Hit it off even better with a girl I recognized from chemistry class. We realized we had been in the same room during all exams. We both had extra time during tests. I joked something along the lines of " we are in disabled people class together". Probably not what I said. It sounded better then. We connected over that. She told me she has dyslexia. I shared that I have neck pain which makes it hard to focus and get stuff done. She carried the conversation. I realized she was really smart. I just kept eye contact and pretended to understand half of what she was saying. Didnt break eye contact for a good 15 minutes. The approach itself was special. She was sitting on the ground outside when I approached her, so I sat down with her. Could have been pretty awkward but it wasnt. Our knees touched, had my arm on her shoulder. Our faces close enough to kiss. I was a little bit entranced by her eyes and mouth. She was quite pretty, especially her face. She talked a little about how she felt dumb compared to her class. I told her that the requirement to get into here was like 5.8 while the national average is 4. The highest score is a 6.That means that everyone in class is way above average smart. We compare ourselves to our classmates but compared to the world we are easily in the top 5%. She agreed to that and we were quite into our conversation. Then her friends showed up and dragged her away to some after party which sucked.
At the end of the night I started talking to a girl from the Netherlands. I dont remember much of the conversation but we talked for a while. I mistakenly assumed she was Spanish when she started talking English to me and we talked about language a little, some about family and about knitting I think. And how much she didnt want to go home because all her friends were partying there. Then the place closed and I was kicked out by the bouncer.
Oh btw, I got laid yesterday! It was just okay. Didnt get off. I dont think I am that attracted to her. She wants to meet once a week or so. I get the feeling she might be a little clingy.
30/100
I have done a lot of approaches since last time. Probably 100 or so but I will only count the ones I remember or that I think went reasonably well. The thing now is that I am a buddy leader during buddy week and a lot of my interactions cant be counted because they are social circle just like last year. Social circle is a lot different and easier. I have come to realize that my practice of cold approaching and pushing the limits of my comfort zone have made me a lot better at social circle.The problem I have is to choose. I need to get over myself and start flirting more with the girls I like. Some memorable cold approaches below:
A really pretty black girl. I started talking to her the first day of buddy week. She wasnt on my group. The next day she found me and told me she had lost her group and wanted to join mine instead. She stood really close. One of the female buddy leaders on my group seemed a little jealous and asked questions about who she was and how I knew her. I will pay attention the next time I see her.
I approached one of the really pretty buddy chiefs. I told her I had heard about her and wanted to know how I pronounced her name. She was carrying a skin paint kit and I asked if she could "put something in my face". She sat down in front of me and told me "dont frown like that", then she looked me straight in the eyes. Our knees touched. She took her time. I noticed her clear blue eyes and soft smile. Got a little turned on actually. I spaced out for probably 5 minutes afterwards. Nofap makes me feel this stuff a lot stronger than usual. I was a happy man. Just a woman putting her hands on my face made me feel blissfull for a few moments. I will hang around her for the next 10 days. Who knows what could happen.
Girl in class. She is the hottest thing I have seen all year. I stopped her yesterday while she was walking with some friends, enjoying herself and eating street food. I told her "that kebab is tasty but you will feel ill afterwards". Her slightly spooked look by the news about the kebab was honestly pretty cute and funny. She told me it was her first kebab ever and that I shouldnt scare her like that. She was biting her lips. It is my new favorite thing.
I found a pretty girl at a preparty. I tried talking with her while playing beer pong. A really aggressive dude got in between us and started hitting on her. I could tell that he was over doing it. She was being polite. The same dude got in between me and another girl later on actually. Must mean that I am hitting on the hottest girls probably. Anyways, I met the same girl a little later at the party and she touched my arm. I have learned by now that if a girl touches me at all early on, she is into me. I responded by putting my arm on her shoulder. We were standing in line to try out the mechanical bull. The conversation was full of sexual innuendos. Something like "damn, that guy lasted 45 seconds". "I dont care how long I last as long as I last longer than you". The chemistry sort of faded out after we rode the bull. That was unfortunate because it was on. She told me she has a class tomorrow at 8 am and probably should head home. I am not sure if that was an invitation or not. She probably hoped I would come along but I didnt know how to handle it. I am probably meeting her again.
Saw a girl in a Tailor Swift sweater. Walked up from behind and asked her if she was a fan. "yes" Are you a big fan? "yes". Wasnt she close by recently? "yes, she was". Did you go to the concert? "yes". She was a little reserved but she seemed happy I asked. That was the end of our conversation. I could probably have gone on a little longer. I guess my strategy this year is to throw out hooks left and right. I will meet at least some of the girls again on campus later and it will be much easier to talk to them again since I already broke the ice.
I have done a lot of approaches since last time. Probably 100 or so but I will only count the ones I remember or that I think went reasonably well. The thing now is that I am a buddy leader during buddy week and a lot of my interactions cant be counted because they are social circle just like last year. Social circle is a lot different and easier. I have come to realize that my practice of cold approaching and pushing the limits of my comfort zone have made me a lot better at social circle.The problem I have is to choose. I need to get over myself and start flirting more with the girls I like. Some memorable cold approaches below:
A really pretty black girl. I started talking to her the first day of buddy week. She wasnt on my group. The next day she found me and told me she had lost her group and wanted to join mine instead. She stood really close. One of the female buddy leaders on my group seemed a little jealous and asked questions about who she was and how I knew her. I will pay attention the next time I see her.
I approached one of the really pretty buddy chiefs. I told her I had heard about her and wanted to know how I pronounced her name. She was carrying a skin paint kit and I asked if she could "put something in my face". She sat down in front of me and told me "dont frown like that", then she looked me straight in the eyes. Our knees touched. She took her time. I noticed her clear blue eyes and soft smile. Got a little turned on actually. I spaced out for probably 5 minutes afterwards. Nofap makes me feel this stuff a lot stronger than usual. I was a happy man. Just a woman putting her hands on my face made me feel blissfull for a few moments. I will hang around her for the next 10 days. Who knows what could happen.
Girl in class. She is the hottest thing I have seen all year. I stopped her yesterday while she was walking with some friends, enjoying herself and eating street food. I told her "that kebab is tasty but you will feel ill afterwards". Her slightly spooked look by the news about the kebab was honestly pretty cute and funny. She told me it was her first kebab ever and that I shouldnt scare her like that. She was biting her lips. It is my new favorite thing.
I found a pretty girl at a preparty. I tried talking with her while playing beer pong. A really aggressive dude got in between us and started hitting on her. I could tell that he was over doing it. She was being polite. The same dude got in between me and another girl later on actually. Must mean that I am hitting on the hottest girls probably. Anyways, I met the same girl a little later at the party and she touched my arm. I have learned by now that if a girl touches me at all early on, she is into me. I responded by putting my arm on her shoulder. We were standing in line to try out the mechanical bull. The conversation was full of sexual innuendos. Something like "damn, that guy lasted 45 seconds". "I dont care how long I last as long as I last longer than you". The chemistry sort of faded out after we rode the bull. That was unfortunate because it was on. She told me she has a class tomorrow at 8 am and probably should head home. I am not sure if that was an invitation or not. She probably hoped I would come along but I didnt know how to handle it. I am probably meeting her again.
Saw a girl in a Tailor Swift sweater. Walked up from behind and asked her if she was a fan. "yes" Are you a big fan? "yes". Wasnt she close by recently? "yes, she was". Did you go to the concert? "yes". She was a little reserved but she seemed happy I asked. That was the end of our conversation. I could probably have gone on a little longer. I guess my strategy this year is to throw out hooks left and right. I will meet at least some of the girls again on campus later and it will be much easier to talk to them again since I already broke the ice.
mr.producer
New Fapstronaut
I made my first cold approach yesterday It didn’t went good but I don’t care, I wanted to do a cold approach since the last year but I was to scared. Since I live in a small town I am planning to take the train to bigger city to approach more girl and improve my skill, my goal is to do a date. Sorry if I made some mistakes because my English isn’t very good
50/100
I have made 5-10 interactions a day since my last entry. It is all a blur now. I will try to keep better track of my approaches moving forward. I had a chat with a french girl at the grocery store. Ran into her twice after that. I developed a crush on a girl I met at some student gathering. I went out with her. She got pretty drunk. We hit it off but I always get anxious when the girl I am hanging out with gets drunk. I will invite her on a proper date if I see her again and try to stay sober this time. I found some friends a week or so ago, 3 girls and one dude. We are currently discussing if we are going to order plane tickets to Malta together. Huge risk of it backfiring somehow but I am in. We are supposed to join some scientific summit and talk about some science shit. Went to quiz night today. Dragged along a girl I met the other day. She seemed pretty anxious and ended up joining a different team. I think she likes me but she has a shit way of showing it. I was sitting next to her. She opened up a little towards the end of it. Will see her again tomorrow. Got laid twice so far. I regret both times. I guess I need to be a little more picky in the future.
I have made 5-10 interactions a day since my last entry. It is all a blur now. I will try to keep better track of my approaches moving forward. I had a chat with a french girl at the grocery store. Ran into her twice after that. I developed a crush on a girl I met at some student gathering. I went out with her. She got pretty drunk. We hit it off but I always get anxious when the girl I am hanging out with gets drunk. I will invite her on a proper date if I see her again and try to stay sober this time. I found some friends a week or so ago, 3 girls and one dude. We are currently discussing if we are going to order plane tickets to Malta together. Huge risk of it backfiring somehow but I am in. We are supposed to join some scientific summit and talk about some science shit. Went to quiz night today. Dragged along a girl I met the other day. She seemed pretty anxious and ended up joining a different team. I think she likes me but she has a shit way of showing it. I was sitting next to her. She opened up a little towards the end of it. Will see her again tomorrow. Got laid twice so far. I regret both times. I guess I need to be a little more picky in the future.
The first couple of approaches are a huge win! Always keep them challenging but not so challenging that you wont do them.
Hi everyone, we've re-opened this thread. We cleared out all the cold approach critical debate and put it in a new thread: https://forum.nofap.com/index.php?threads/cold-approaches-discussion.363336/
Please direct any further cold approach critical discussion to this thread. And cool it with the personal insults, please.
Please direct any further cold approach critical discussion to this thread. And cool it with the personal insults, please.
I will restart my counter again. I have learned a lot so far after around 150 approaches in different settings. A small percentage of them have been cold approaches in the streets which I find absolutely terrifying. A majority of them have been in night clubs and at parties and those are a lot different. Usually have to talk loud and all the girls have their guard up. Then there is social circle. It is maybe the easiest way to interact with women but it is hard to date more than one girl in any social circle. It is probably the most mentally healthy way of interacting with women. I didnt learn much during my social circle approaches last year but I have gained confidence since then.
A new school year is starting next week. I will try as best as I can to count my interactions but I need to have multiple categories. A proper cold approach would be to walk up to a stranger during day time and start a conversation but I am going to meet people everywhere. I think I should coin the term "warm approaches" too if I already know them.
A new school year is starting next week. I will try as best as I can to count my interactions but I need to have multiple categories. A proper cold approach would be to walk up to a stranger during day time and start a conversation but I am going to meet people everywhere. I think I should coin the term "warm approaches" too if I already know them.
Went to the gym today and had two different girls give me approach invitations. One walked in front of me twice when there was no reason to. The second one smiled at me. Both were subtle but relatively clear. I havent found a good way to deal with them yet. I have to actually approach to figure out if she was actually checking me out or not.
Update
No approaches since my last entry. I said "Hi" to one woman today. I was walking home from the gym and thinking about a girl that walked past me 4-5 times. No one does that unless interested. So I decided to say "hi" to the next pretty woman I saw which I did. I need to be more assertive in general. I am lost in my own thoughts a lot and miss a lot of signals.
No approaches since my last entry. I said "Hi" to one woman today. I was walking home from the gym and thinking about a girl that walked past me 4-5 times. No one does that unless interested. So I decided to say "hi" to the next pretty woman I saw which I did. I need to be more assertive in general. I am lost in my own thoughts a lot and miss a lot of signals.
5/100
Trying to remember my approaches recently. I remember some.
Cold approaches: A girl sat down next to me before class and I didnt know her at all. Asked her if she was studying programming as well. She told me no. She was going to math class. I told her I thought math was a bit boring but that I managed okay. She told me that it is insane that I would say math is boring but not difficult. She told me she was attending everything. I continued with that and told her I thought programming was a bit boring as well but that it was relatively easy. I had to leave for class after a few minutes but I was happy I opened her.
Two girls in front of me in class: Didnt know them at all. Asked them how they were doing. They asked me "with the assignment?" Yea. "We are doing alright". I dont remember the rest. One of the girls played with her hair for the rest of class. It was a workshop so talking a lot wasnt really possible. I also talked with the girls behind me. I knew one of them already so that would be a warm approach. I dont know her that well so if I dont talk to her, it will get weird.
At a bonfire evening I organized and got 30 people to show up to: I was approached a couple times which is natural at such an event. Some of those people can be considered friends now so that I cant really call talking with them approaching anymore. But some of them I didnt know that well. Two warm approaches I would say.
Dudes: Chatted up some random strangers at the gym. They were guys but they were cold approaches. I havent worked up the courage to open girls at the gym yet. Lots of prying eyes.
I went grocery shopping with a girl one day and had another girl driving me to my place picking up the same groceries a few days later. I made sure she met my cat which she thought was the prettiest cat she had ever seen.
So to sum up:
Cold approaches
2
Warm approaches
2
Dudes
2
Trying to remember my approaches recently. I remember some.
Cold approaches: A girl sat down next to me before class and I didnt know her at all. Asked her if she was studying programming as well. She told me no. She was going to math class. I told her I thought math was a bit boring but that I managed okay. She told me that it is insane that I would say math is boring but not difficult. She told me she was attending everything. I continued with that and told her I thought programming was a bit boring as well but that it was relatively easy. I had to leave for class after a few minutes but I was happy I opened her.
Two girls in front of me in class: Didnt know them at all. Asked them how they were doing. They asked me "with the assignment?" Yea. "We are doing alright". I dont remember the rest. One of the girls played with her hair for the rest of class. It was a workshop so talking a lot wasnt really possible. I also talked with the girls behind me. I knew one of them already so that would be a warm approach. I dont know her that well so if I dont talk to her, it will get weird.
At a bonfire evening I organized and got 30 people to show up to: I was approached a couple times which is natural at such an event. Some of those people can be considered friends now so that I cant really call talking with them approaching anymore. But some of them I didnt know that well. Two warm approaches I would say.
Dudes: Chatted up some random strangers at the gym. They were guys but they were cold approaches. I havent worked up the courage to open girls at the gym yet. Lots of prying eyes.
I went grocery shopping with a girl one day and had another girl driving me to my place picking up the same groceries a few days later. I made sure she met my cat which she thought was the prettiest cat she had ever seen.
So to sum up:
Cold approaches
2
Warm approaches
2
Dudes
2