150 days, no longer a sissy!

@Roady congrats! That's insane.

 

Update:

I had a relapse, and it sucked for a long time. But I think I had some important takeaways from it:

- Ok this is gonna be somewhat generic: life can be thought of as a series of choices. I'll leave it at that, but it's choices that you, the protagonist, make.

- Hebb's Rule:

• This is not easy to explain, so I am going to draw a diagram:
• So, essentially, we've got two neurons on the left that output to Neuron Z on the right. For our purposes:
• Neuron A - fires when you encounter sissy porn/AGP content
• Neuron B - fires when you have sex
• Neuron Z - the firing of this neuron (due to A and B) causes sexual arousal
• Hebb's Rule is summarized as neurons that fire together wire together and neurons that fire apart wire apart
• When you make the choice to engage in sissy porn content, you are undoubtedly activating Neuron A, and it's connection with Neuron Z becomes stronger.
• If you've just started your recovery, then Neuron A probably has a much larger connection with Z than B does with Z. B is the neuron that activates when you have sex.
• However, if you are not engaging with sissy porn content, Neuron A's connection with Neuron Z becomes smaller. This is best seen in how Neuron Z is going to fire due to Neuron B. So Neuron A does not provide input in the firing. It's connection with the arousal Neuron Z is going to literally get smaller from a physical standpoint.
• That essentially summarizes Hebb's Rule. However, if you want to talk about this more just reply to the post and we can go into more detail.

- Recovery for life is possible. This is going to be hard at first, but try your best to immerse yourself in what your friends are doing. One thing I notice is common among the community is a very high fear of social rejection. Once you get hit with rejection a few times it's still going to sting, but it'll be easier to shake off and move on. Why? Because you've got better things to do and worry about when you're immersed in different activities. If you're in your house all day, then that's a different story because then you have too time much to think about things and you may have a tendency to embark on multiple negative thought spirals, especially related to social errors.

- Now in the previous takeaway, I talk about shaking things off. This will be hard to do, but adopting a Stoic mindset may help. Personally, when I make some sort of mistake that makes me "cringe at myself", I take a deep breath and think to myself "I accept that I may have fucked up my relationship with my friend". And then I exhale and say to myself, "I choose indifference."

-Now that follows into my next point: suppression is having a reaction to something, whereas indifference is choosing not to react. If you repress a thought, it's analogous to getting to worked up about it and trying to "put it down." In other words, you're aiming to put the thought in a mental box and throw it into the recesses of your mind. Indifference is instead letting the intrusive thought melt away. You're not spending any of your cognitive resources on it, which you choose to devote to the task at hand.

- My last point is: in psychology, a behavior like going for a run is just a behavior, but when you repeat that behavior many times it becomes a habit, and when a habit is done for a long time it becomes a trait - a part of yourself. So you can become a runner, a bodybuilder, or a Fapstronaut (lmao).