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15day fell batter

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by Daddyisuehere, Jan 10, 2023.

  1. Daddyisuehere

    Daddyisuehere Fapstronaut

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    after falling up and down fighting addiction for several years.. finally I passed my lowest phase..
    .
    and kept asking myself... the root of all problems in my life....
    i feel lazy.. panic attacks... bad thoughts about the future.. guilty. bad posture. dull face..loneliness is from this addiction..

    .
    .
    I will PMO almost every day.. for hours looking for videos. tab on my cellphone until it's full.. flooding my brain with millions of dopamine without doing anything...
    continuing to damage my graymatter... making it difficult for me to make the right decisions in life.. . .

    and even I feel worthless .. even though I have a family who loves me .. I have a future that I fight for .. but I always fall into this vicious circle ...

    at most I will survive 3 days then wet dream and when I wake up will PMO again.. .
    .
    .
    Then I realized how deep I had gone.. and i promised myself now..i will stop addiction and slowly heal my brain..
    .
    .
    .
    . . for 7 days I went on vacation to the beach alone without anyone... writing daily journals.
    . write anything that is valuable in my life.. a reason for me to keep moving forward to a better path
    .
    .
    write anything that gets me back to pMO keep writing as many reasons as i can.. until i cry alone.. .
    why.. why why and keep asking . .


    after vacation i reached my best point 15 days without pmo..

    not even a minute to peek...
    usually when it's been 3 days i will have wet dreams.. and the most magical thing.. when I dreamed of having sex for 10 days in that dream I refused...

    i go to the gym 6 days a week now..trying to heal my mind and get the energy flowing.. .
    .
    . I know when we stop PMO it will be better if we do good things..

    I want to write a journal again.. in my daily life..
    it's quite helpful..but I will write it here I'm afraid when someone from my family reads it..
    . and hopefully.. can help people who are struggling for the same goal and now I will try to make new habits.
    so that my brain is clean again..

    I pray for all of us..there will be hope..there will be a reason for us to fight for in life..stay optimistic...
     
    Mike1991 and M_H like this.

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