17 years in addiction

Discussion in 'New to NoFap' started by belloniAmadeo, May 9, 2020.

  1. belloniAmadeo

    belloniAmadeo New Fapstronaut

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    Hi everyone.

    To make long story short - I'm 27 yo man, I'm addicted to PMO since I was 10. So living for almost 2/3 of my life with addiction, make me life miserable, pathetic etc. For last 5-6 years I'm trying to get rid of my demons, as you can guess - no positive result.

    My addiction gave me serious social anxiety - I event quit my studies twice, becouse I wasn't able to stay in one room with larger group of people - I'm sweating like fountain, my face is turning into red and formless grimace of fear, my voice breaks and so on and so on.

    Since my gf left me 3 years ago, I really don't have anyone close to me, so there's nobody I can talk to. I had meetings with psychiatrys and psychologist, but every time they focus on my alcoholism (I'm addicted to alco too), and they ignored the real problem.

    I'm here now becouse I need help - after another dissapointment with girl from dating app (I'm unable to had sex or even stay really close to gf) I get drunk for couple of days, and the day I got sober, I decided to quit drinking. From that day I got drunk only once, and it's almost 2 months. I quit smoking in 2 weeks (beeing addicted for 3 years). And now, it's 10th day of me with no PMO.

    To make it clear - my longest break was when I was 14 yo, it was about a month without PMO. Since then, longest strike was 2 weeks, and for last 6 years, I wasn't able to make it longer than 10 days.

    So I have question for U guys, since all superpowers and motivation are gone (like every time after 7-9 days), there's no way to go out (COVID), I have noone to talk to... How to manage all of this? How to finally make my mind aware of relapsing as the worst thing possible?
    Since I'm writing this post, I know I think sober, but I can't promise if I go outside and see piece of ass I'll return home and then... eh.

    I'm willing to stay strong with you guys :)
     

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  2. I know how you feel man. Social anxiety is really one of the worst thing ever in this society because interacting with people is frequent you know. Anyway. Welcome to NoFap. ;)
    I'm gonna be honest with you: you won't. That's why it's called an addiction. Your brain is addicted to this shit and will do anything possible to make you relapse. What you need to do is stop listening to this little voice telling you that porn is right and staying strong.

    Good luck bro. I believe in you.

    YOU WILL SUCCEED. YOU MUST SUCCEED.
     
  3. Hey, welcome to the NoFap community
    : )

    It's nice to see you here fighting the good fight alongside us!
    First let me go ahead and drop some helpful links for you:
    Getting Started Guide / Forum Rules / How to Use the NoFap forums/ Glossary/ NoFap Panic button/
    Set up your day counter /
    Rebooting Resources/
    Accountability groups (new!)/
    About NoFap/ Support NoFap

    Here is just some advice:
    First and foremost please take a careful look at each section in the forum, there may be something(s) you will find to be of big help to you.

    Secondly I advise you to be active on your profile(as there a few active people in the profile section). Please start by choosing an avatar and then begin posting frequent status posts to show you're active and needing support/encouragement.
    The forum has got a neat little feature that shows freshly posted statuses for all users to see.
    People will find your profile and give you support.

    There’s a portion of people who love communicating in the profile section..(it should be and is )mostly spportive talk but it doesn't hurt to deviate from supportive conversations. It would be great to have you join in and become part of the team!
    We support others in the threads, profile posts, and journals/reboot logs.
    Once you receive some support, please be sure and be grateful to the member for the help/support you received and consider giving some in return to anyone you wish.

    Thirdly, you should highly consider creating a public journal/reboot log (in the appropriate sectionfor you) to write about your days in depth for us members to follow along on your journey and offer support to you on.

    Please start your journal in the correct section and with that, also try your best to post in the correct sections as it is mandatory and would be helpful to the mods who organize the forum. : )

    Last but not least: Good luck on your journey here, make sure to really give it a try with all your heart!
     
    | Nico | likes this.
  4. FlowingSaiyan

    FlowingSaiyan Fapstronaut

    First of all, welcome! You have taken the most important step in overcoming your addiction - realizing its demerits. I assure you it's only a matter of time that you overcome it. Keep that in mind the entire journey.
    As for making your mind aware of relapsing as the worst possible thing, I agree with @|DEKU| - you can't. If you could, then you would have done so a long time ago. But hey! You can't change that, right? So why think about it anyway. I repeat - you will overcome your addiction. Just have a strong resolve and be very mindful of whenever you are aroused. This will help you identify triggers which you can then avoid. I would also suggest picking up a new hobby (and it should be new, something you haven't done before) and really focus on mastering it. Also try some mindfulness meditation. This will increase your awareness, and trust me, awareness is itself curative. If you are very aware while masturbating, your body is very intelligent to know that it's not good for you.
    Last but not least, enjoy the process. We are with you.:)
     
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