17 y's old in relationship

Discussion in 'Rebooting in a Relationship' started by Nofper1999, Jan 1, 2017.

  1. Nofper1999

    Nofper1999 Fapstronaut

    Hello, I'm 17 years old and my gf is 16. We're 2 years together but never had actually sex because of my Premature Ejaculation. I tried many times to penetrate but as soon as it went in, I felt I was going to cum and back off immediately. Fortunately, my virgin gf every time felt pain and told me to stop so I wouldn't feel ashamed in front of her. Now I've been 33 days without Porn and Masturbation. Until 5 days ago I would never have any boners since the beginning of rebooting (something I never experienced. I always had hard boners) which I think happened from the "shock" of No PMO. Even when I was meeting with my gf and he touched me and kissing I didn't have any boner. But now I'm better. I have gained some more frequent boners. The problem is that yesterday I were in her home and she went to bj me but I felt like Cumming without even touching her mouth on my dick and stopped her immediately. Until when?? I know it's only a month of No PMO but there is no little progress in this... I want to have sex with her and she wants too but I won't be able to... I am thinking of telling her to make me cum first (with her hands) and then to try and have sex, hoping it will last 1-2 minutes . But i dont know if this will harm my progress knowing that there is only one month of no orgasm. Any thoughts?? I would appreciate any helpful replies and conversations from someone with experience on this.. Thank you!!
  2. IGY

    IGY Guest

    Welcome to the NoFap community @Nofper1999. It is hard to be patient in matters of sex, but that is what I advise here.

    Your current effort of nearly five weeks with no masturbation or porn is very good. But it is still early days. Although people can chose to have sex while they are rebooting, it can be problematic. It can make a relapse more likely as the urges to masturbate to porn increase after having sex. Also, it slows down the healing process because of the amount of dopamine it releases at a time when your brain is trying to recover from vast overstimulation of dopamine via your PMO addiction.

    My advice would be to honestly explain the situation to your girlfriend and that you may need several months before your reward circuits normalise and you overcome your former addiction. I hope that helps and I wish you well in your recovery.
    Nofper1999 likes this.
  3. The Consigliere

    The Consigliere Fapstronaut

    Welcome! @IGY explained it very well! You two have been together for awhile, so I feel she would understand what you are going through. In the long run, you both would benefit from your recovery. Your bond with each other will be a lot more intimate as PMO is behind you. It takes time, but we are all in this together!
  4. ILoathePorn

    ILoathePorn Distinguished Fapstronaut

    The first part of this is the old fashion person in me and it wants to tell you that your both too young for that. However, you both are going to do what you want to do. I believe what @IGY said is what I would say. This is a long journey to reboot your brain. Be patient. It is well worth it. Don't try to rush the rewiring. Most people have relapses after they orgasm or have very strong cravings to relapse. I recommend letting your brain heal and rewire before you start to add sex and other things in the mix. I would see how your doing after a month or two or three. When that time is up then see where you are with your reboot.

    I want to make it clear that I am not encouraging you two to have sex. During this time if the two of you are going to decide to have sex you can get birth control in order and all those things. Use that time to plan well and be safe. Most importantly, be honest with her about all of this.

    I hope this helped and I know it probably sounded old fashioned but sex is a great responsibility and should not be taken lightly. To many people do these days and things don't turn out well.
    Nofper1999 likes this.
  5. Nofper1999

    Nofper1999 Fapstronaut

    Thanks a lot to all of you... But im quite pessimistic about all this... Let's take that the time passes and I had a perfect no PMO progress without any orgasm for 10 months. How do I know that I am healed? And will this make me last more than 15 minutes? (Now I only last 15 seconds)

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