Eli_84
Fapstronaut
Hi everyone. This is my first post on the sight. I hope to begin a reboot on August 1st, 2018 and goddamn, I could use some support.
I guess I'm addicted to addictions! I had a collection of them for a while there! Generations of depression and obsessive compulsion are packed into my DNA but regardless, I'm absolutely fucking determined to beat this thing! The gratuitous objectification of women is the last big psychological and emotional dependency left in my life but it was also the first. I'm part of the generation (as I'm sure many of you are) that transitioned from paper to pixels in our teens. Now, a 34 year old BOY! I feel a lot of anger toward the industry that first exploits women as a means to then exploit the loneliness (the humanness!) of men and boys who are made to feel ashamed of themselves for seeking out a crutch when real companionship couldn't be found.
After going cold turkey with cigarettes and overcoming a drinking problem that was literally killing me, somehow porn has become a greater obstacle in my life than ever before! Honestly guys, it's such a huge source of shame, not being able to deal with this alone and fearing failure. Any advice, encouragement or suggestions about how to make the best use of the community aspect of this resource would all be greatly appreciated! My start date is a week away and I want to be ready. I've written it now, which I guess makes it real.
Wish me luck...
I guess I'm addicted to addictions! I had a collection of them for a while there! Generations of depression and obsessive compulsion are packed into my DNA but regardless, I'm absolutely fucking determined to beat this thing! The gratuitous objectification of women is the last big psychological and emotional dependency left in my life but it was also the first. I'm part of the generation (as I'm sure many of you are) that transitioned from paper to pixels in our teens. Now, a 34 year old BOY! I feel a lot of anger toward the industry that first exploits women as a means to then exploit the loneliness (the humanness!) of men and boys who are made to feel ashamed of themselves for seeking out a crutch when real companionship couldn't be found.
After going cold turkey with cigarettes and overcoming a drinking problem that was literally killing me, somehow porn has become a greater obstacle in my life than ever before! Honestly guys, it's such a huge source of shame, not being able to deal with this alone and fearing failure. Any advice, encouragement or suggestions about how to make the best use of the community aspect of this resource would all be greatly appreciated! My start date is a week away and I want to be ready. I've written it now, which I guess makes it real.
Wish me luck...
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) which I'm sure I'll be journaling about on day #1 when I'm feeling a little safer sharing these kinds of details among strangers. Sounds like a cop out, I know! Honestly though, no sweet goodbyes, no bingeing. Just a unique situation that needs to get dealt with before this thing can truly begin! I'm past making bullshit excuses to people with my best interests in mind. If this thing happens by August 1st it'll make sobriety look like a walk in the park! 
