Well, it is not about self hating yourself and then self extinguishing at the end. Recovery journey is all about learning how to truly self love and accept all of you: your faults, past mistakes. Addiction is a symptom of lack of self love. It happens as a result of growing up not being truly seen, loved, emotionally neglected or abused. So to recover you need to learn what has been lacking in your life. It is all about learning how to forgive ourselves and having self compassion for who we are as people. It is about learning how we feel and accept our feelings rather than runing away from them. It is about accepting our desires and not constantly fighting ourselves. It is about welcoming our feelings and thoughts and not constantly fighting parts of who we are. Once we learn that, our world will change as we would go about our days looking after ourselves with love and tenderness. It is up to you to make your life meaningful and make your days count. You can do with your days what ever you want to and bring a positive change in this world. You can decide to continue to self criticise or you can decide that you are willing to brake out of the paterns of negativity, give yourself a brake and actualy start anjoying your days here. I know it is hard to do. But this is the only way out of this self abusing and self neglecting and self belittling cyckle addiction is. We need to learn how to be trully self loving, self accepting and happy. We need to learn how to connect with other people in a giving and non jugemental way. You see, we are what we have learned, experienced and how we interpreted the world. If your life experiences were loving, accepting, full meaning, then most likely you would not be here. But you are here, and I am here and this is a time when we rewire our negative brain circuits and direct ourselfes into light, wellness, happiness, self forgiveness, self acceptances, self worth, confidence and positive future. This is self healing and recovery.