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Discussion in 'Events & Challenges' started by 2525, Sep 9, 2017.
1/21 just finished a 14 day challenge and moving on to this one. I am doing full mode which las night got real, the urges were there but I stayed strong.
Day 6 of 21. Today is Monday, and is historically tough.
I’m new and dont know where to post a journal, so I am doing it here cause I need to get out of my head.
It’s monday, and Mondays are always always the hardest for me. The gloom starts on Sunday evening when I have to go to work. I have a new job and I like, so its not the job, its just the feeling I get every Monday. And have for a long time. As the week progresses it’s usually easier.
Today I went to a stretching session because I have an injury I am trying to work through. The girl that stretched me out was young and strong. She was stretching my legs ( which I very much needed). The combination of her touches and the way she pressed on me was arousing. It shouldn’t be because she was clearly just doing her job, but I couldn’t help but start to feel aroused. Of course nothing happened, but I still feel like I just entered into the danger zone. Now all I want to do is recreate the situation into a porn video, and get on with the PMO. Bad news all around. As I am writing I have chosen not to engage, but I know how these things go, I stay strong for a bit and than the temptation comes back in an hour or two or three and my defenses fall apart. How do I keep that from happening? Still day 6, still alive and unscathed for the moment.
Day 0 of 21. I Had another relapse yesterday
Another relapse...62 times in 23 days
Another relapse ... 4 th time today and total 63 times in 23 days