Background: I've started watching P when I was around 13. Since then it's been a decade having this bad habit. At first I watched it once a week, when there was no one home, but after turning 15 I started to PMO more often. When I was around 17 I used to PMO almost everyday, sometimes I binged and did it multiple times in a single day. I started to realize the true effects PMO had on me when I met my girlfriend when I was 21. When we were about to have sex, I had PIED. At that time I didn't know it was PIED, and thought it maybe was because of stress. After months of not being able to have a full erection, I came across Nofap and Yourbrainonporn. It suddenly made sense. So I started doing Nofap. My maximum streak was around 62 days. The effects were real, for the first time I was able to have an erection and actually have sex with my gf. I even had erections just by looking at her or just by feeling her touch. However, I relapsed. The reasons were me having fantasies about sex with my gf, every morning as soon as I woke up; and every night before going to sleep. This soon led to cravings, first browsing instagram, then having little peaks in twitter, and eventually falling into PMO. Since that streak I haven't been able to reach even 30 days straight. I feel the effects of PMO in my everyday life. I feel lethargic, slow, unmotivated. I'm not able to sit and work for more than 30 minutes, some days I can't even do anything at all. My self confidence is really low. I get easily stressed and have constant anxiety, and I can't deal with it by myself. Before when I was 18 I felt really good about myself, I felt confident and capable of reaching my goals. Now I feel uncapable of doing something of value. But I know that deep within me I have potential, I have felt strong and confident before, I know how it feels and I'm certain that I can reach my potential. The only thing holding me back is this addiction, so I've made a vow to myself, to never watch porn ever again. Right now I'm 12 days into nofap, for me its forbidden to go into instagram or twitter fishing for hot images. I know browsing those sites will always end up eventually on a relapse. Also I wont allow myself to have fantasies, even about real sex with my gf. In my previous experience, thats were all the relapses start. I'm fully committed to my vow. I don't need porn, it has no value for me, it's just holding me back.