27 year old and still a virgin

Survival of the fittest said:
Ànd I feeling lonely and the fact that I am still a virgin is killing me and the urges are on peak
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22 years old and also a virgin. It is a constant thought. I really want to meet someone. How the hell do you meet someone?
What things would you change if you were me?
I would love to help you, but I'm in the same boat.

Take care mate, I hope one day we can do it.
 
OhWhenThe said:
I almost had a panic attack when an attractive girl was walking towards me down a narrow street, honestly I think my heart would have been racing less if I were about to jump out of a plane. Maybe it's because I'm hitting the withdrawal stage again so situations like this become heightened but it just makes me feel so depressed and hopeless. If that's what I'm like just walking past a girl how am I ever going to talk to one, let alone get to the point of having sex. When I was 15 I would hang out with girls all the time but now at 30 I'm scared to death of them ... God I have a long road ahead of me.
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I call this "attraction-shock". This used to happen to me too. We, as men, are trained for this to happen in our gynocentric society. You must learn to remove the witchcraft from your mind. It's a combination of feminism, female celebrities and makeup sorcery.

Do a google search entitled "makeup before and after". Look at the pictures. You will see two different women. This is what is causing the attraction-shock.

Attraction-shock is a response to a few things:

1) Not believing you are worth pretty girls (your birthright)
2) Your senses are confused from the makeup as makeup highlights positive features and de-accentuates negative features
3) ...and most likely the years of porn distorting your mind, like it did to mine. Porn tricks our man-brains to hyper-process an untouchable female form (e.g. on a screen, an illusion). This makes men feel "separate" from attractive girls in the real world. As long as you continue to stay away from porn this effect will diminish over time.

Do not let these girls use their dark magic on you. Always keep in mind that: cosmetics = low self esteem. Women use makeup because they are trained to believe that they are not pretty unless they buy products and apply them correctly. They put the makeup on to attract men. The dark magic is cast against both men and women.

Ironically I've never met one guy who cares in the slightest if a girl has makeup on or not. Ever.

After studying the before and after pics on the internet you will learn to see the girl under the makeup and expensive GAP clothes. It's only a disguise. There's just a girl under there... scared, tired, hungry, lonely... just say hi and you'll see what I mean.
 
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Smoky said:
22 years old and also a virgin. It is a constant thought. I really want to meet someone. How the hell do you meet someone?
What things would you change if you were me?
I would love to help you, but I'm in the same boat.

Take care mate, I hope one day we can do it.
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Sorry brother. The only way to meet girls is to take a shower, put on clean clothes, brush your teeth and walk around your city pretending you are on a mission while saying hello to cute girls and getting into conversations. I will think something like this (a literal example): "I need a new pen from the dollar store on the west end of the downtown. I will get off the bus/park my car on the east end of the downtown and walk to the store on the west end and look for cute girls to say hi to."

Don't worry about "disturbing" girls. Just say hi, if she smiles back and says hi, you're mostly likely in. Here's the trick:

While you walk around your city have a smirk on your face and make eye contact with every girl you pass. If she holds the gaze for a few seconds say hello, if she looks away keep moving.

THE ONLY WAY TO MEET GIRLS IS EYE CONTACT. Do not let your gaze fall if your eyes lock. Say hi! Hey! Hello!

Got eye contact? Don't delay! These are my "lines". I never change them or their order.

1. Hey, how's it going?
2. What's your name?
3. What are you up to today/tonight?
4. Want to go out sometime?
5. What's your number?
 
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Hyperdrive said:
Sorry brother. The only way to meet girls is to take a shower, put on clean clothes, brush your teeth and walk around your city pretending you are on a mission while saying hello to cute girls and getting into conversations. I will think something like this (a literal example): "I need a new pen from the dollar store on the west end of the downtown. I will get off the bus/park my car on the east end of the downtown and walk to the store on the west end and look for cute girls to say hi to."

Don't worry about "disturbing" girls. Just say hi, if she smiles back and says hi, you're mostly likely in. Here's the trick:

While you walk around your city have a smirk on your face and make eye contact with every girl you pass. If she holds the gaze for a few seconds say hello, if she looks away keep moving.

THE ONLY WAY TO MEET GIRLS IS EYE CONTACT. Do not let your gaze fall if your eyes lock. Say hi! Hey! Hello!

Got eye contact? Don't delay! These are my "lines". I never change them or their order.

1. Hey, how's it going?
2. What's your name?
3. What are you up to today/tonight?
4. Want to go out sometime?
5. What's your number?
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I've never done that before. I've been fighting with some other things all these years, but now I feel ready.
Einstein said it once... "The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again, but expecting different results"
So... yeah. I definitely should try it.

Your words mean so much for me. I appreciate it.
Thank you so much. I hope you are doing well.
 
Smoky said:
I've never done that before. I've been fighting with some other things all these years, but now I feel ready.
Einstein said it once... "The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again, but expecting different results"
So... yeah. I definitely should try it.

Your words mean so much for me. I appreciate it.
Thank you so much. I hope you are doing well.
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You're welcome man. I hope you're doing alright too. Go and get those phone numbers.
 
So what, if you are still a virgin? are you going to die because you are still a virgin? If that's the case than it's a problem for everyone. I live in a country where sex before married is a taboo, so being virgin isn't a problem for me. But I know it might be hard for you if you live in country with western cultures. My main point is, there are more great things other than sex in this world. Sex is not everything. Keep trying to improve yourself for a better version of yourself, not for girls or sex. Remember, sex isn't everything in this world. Change your mindset about your life! I'm sure someday you will meet a girl that are good for you. Sorry for bad English
 
KingWhalers said:
So what, if you are still a virgin? are you going to die because you are still a virgin? If that's the case than it's a problem for everyone. I live in a country where sex before married is a taboo, so being virgin isn't a problem for me. But I know it might be hard for you if you live in country with western cultures. My main point is, there are more great things other than sex in this world. Sex is not everything. Keep trying to improve yourself for a better version of yourself, not for girls or sex. Remember, sex isn't everything in this world. Change your mindset about your life! I'm sure someday you will meet a girl that are good for you. Sorry for bad English
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Words to the wise.

After you lose your virginity, you will think
is that all there is to sex?
 
LOSEmyselftoSAVEmyself said:
Also, man if you lose your virginity,
you will be addicted to the sex.
And you will be chasing after her or other women
all the time.

It ruins good things and good habits,
like working out, studying or work,
all you think about is her or being a player or something.

Or, you can just straight up walk away.
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That's true....Kreutzer Sonata by Tolstoj explain it really well. I think some people can controk that instinct anyway. I also read about nofappers that relapsed with porn some days after sex (and they had a long no pmo streak).
At this point it seem that Platonic Love is the only truth with sex only for reproduction.
 
En?gma said:
I think some people can controk that instinct anyway. I also read about nofappers that relapsed with porn some days after sex (and they had a long no pmo streak).
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I can conditionally agree by saying you can control that instinct IF you are deep in a reboot (30+ days, hard mode).

About relapsing with porn after sex, I totally agree with that part because it has happened to me.

I have twice met women, had sex, and the sex broke a streak.
Then the next day, I was back to where I was before, using PM.

So, I just don't think it is a good idea to go from a reboot directly into sex.

First build your life out so you have a good career, then find a relationship,
then you can look into the intimacy.

Too many dudes on here get to 90 days, get a big promotion at work, a big raise,
then go get laid, and ruin everything.
 
Ah yes that dreaded number in our heads. I recently turned 25 and thought about the fact that I am a virgin at 25. Usually I don't think about the number often because that comes from an external place and is about the past. I used to have social anxiety and didn't even pursue a relationship because of it. Instead I escaped into video games and porn.
But thats all in the past. What matters is what I am doing now.
I am now in my second year at a prestigious university and I'm writing outstanding grades. Before christmas I went on two dates with an incredibly beautiful and sweet woman I met at university. We did not end up being together but it blew my mind that a woman like her would want to go out with me.
But I know now that I just have to focus on myself and how I can be better as a person. As long as I can keep true to that things are going to work out eventually.
I saw you have a buddhist avatar. Try to think about how crucial the concept of impermanence is to buddhism. Sure it's going to take some time, but this part of your life will pass one day too.
Edit: and dont get me wrong, although I am very postive about my future I still suffer. I long for intimacy and sometimes when I go to bed I imagine what it would be like to cuddle up to a girlfriend and fall asleep together. It's pretty fucking sad.
 
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Honestly, I do not mean to be rude or ignorant, but if being a virgin is really a big problem for you, be aware
that you can always hire a professional and be done with the virgin part in a few hours. My honest opinion is
that if you find that shameful, then you might have to work on what produces that shame, which seems to be
the problem.
Sex-workers do that for a living, not to serve some underground power. And while this "sport" is usually filled
with unecessary lust, compulsion and addiction, there are many cases a sex-worker can help cross boundaries
or even help with psychological problems.
 
Survival of the fittest said:
I have been masturbating on porn since I was 14 yrs old .. after I was around 18 yrs my academic and mental health was very much affected of which I decided to quit this thing . Was masturbating like 6-7 times per day that time . I finally had put this on a hault on this . But I started experiencing many urine infections which around took me 2-3 yrs to get back on track. Then I some how got my focus and everything back and started my college days . But the college days wasn't easy as well and I somehow lend up again into porn and masturbation and started there for a year or two again . Then again I put this on a hault . I remember my max was 30 days . Although during my prof exams I never use to masturbate but it was unconsciously done as was busy . So never thought so hard on this . And my main trigger at that time was lonliness . I am social awkward even now . Had many crushes . 3-4 girls have before proposed me but I use to loose interest in them after a month . Was busy masturbating . Really lost the contact of real world . No real friends . Had finally one girlfriend that too stayed for 2 months and then got cheated . So had a break up . This is the time I have to react for my career . Heard about NoFap from one of my friend . Read many articles on this and all matched to my symptoms and behaviour I was facing . So decided to give it a try but as days passed I realised I was àddicted to it and this was the reason behind everything I suffered since my whole childhood . It's my 31st day on NoFap pmo hard mode . Ànd I feeling lonely and the fact that I am still a virgin is killing me and the urges are on peak . Please help . I want it to make through 200 days . I am working on it .
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Hello my friend,

I'm 27 years old too, I'm virgin as well. 150+ Days NO PMO / NO SEX
I don't care anymore about being a virgin or not, what i care about is building myself up and making my life better. I suggest you do the same, forget your dick a year or two or how long it takes to become successful, become successful and you'll get the pretties girl around you if you still want that!

Good Luck!
 
LOSEmyselftoSAVEmyself said:
Also, man if you lose your virginity,
you will be addicted to the sex.
And you will be chasing after her or other women
all the time.

It ruins good things and good habits,
like working out, studying or work,
all you think about is her or being a player or something.

Or, you can just straight up walk away.
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Hello . I guess you were right about it . I am no more a virgin . Have a very good gf who take care of me really well and I love her alot . Everything was really working fine untill last 4 months when we both end up into a long distance relationship. It really sucks . I have again started into a loop of porn and masturbation . I thought before that having a good gf would help me out with it but as soon as we were having sex it was all fine . But long distance trailed on me . Feeling like doomed frustrated stupid lost focus . Feeling helpless . Don't really know how to deal with it .
 
Survival of the fittest said:
Hello . I guess you were right about it . I am no more a virgin . Have a very good gf who take care of me really well and I love her alot . Everything was really working fine untill last 4 months when we both end up into a long distance relationship. It really sucks . I have again started into a loop of porn and masturbation . I thought before that having a good gf would help me out with it but as soon as we were having sex it was all fine . But long distance trailed on me . Feeling like doomed frustrated stupid lost focus . Feeling helpless . Don't really know how to deal with it .
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Alright, so you are being honest, that's really good. It's rare, it's amazing.
Then the question is, how can you break out of this destructive cycle?

First of all, remember that everyone is helpless to an addiction.
That's what makes it an addiction. If we could stop, we'd just stop. We can't.

So you should take a few days or a week or so and not put any pressure on yourself,
it's going to be futile because of the chaser effect.
Then gather up your guts and start building a hard mode reboot.

Just make up your mind every day to survive ONLY that day.

All the other life problems outside of PMO will start to get solved.
It's tough, I can sympathize. I started my first reboot in 2018, and I've only completed 90 days twice. I am hopeful about this current streak.

We just wake up and pray, and survive that day without PMO.
Next thing you know, time has gone by and things will be better.
They will be because you paid for it by suffering through a reboot.
Trust in that, lean into the process. Reap the rewards later.
 
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