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Discussion in 'Events & Challenges' started by 2525, May 17, 2018.
3 day challange complete!
I started edging and couldnt control myself.
I fucked up on last day.
DAY 0 again
You can find me on 7 days challenge
Very important to stop browsing news web just to see if there are some spicy pics. I do that every morning and is the reason of my last relapses.
I will block the internet before sleep.
Hey dudes, day 0. Good time to get back on track.
0/3...this was a ugly relapse
I reset 3 days ago (1xPMO) but my genitals still hurt.
Today I avoided the situation in which I usually reset so I almost have the 4. day already managed
Nice one man
I've failed miserably. At first I did relapse on Saturday to Sunday night(after 3 days being clear...) - woke up to take a piss and when I came back to the bed *boom* - got an insane urge I gave in. I didn't sleep for about 5-6 hours and edged to porn in the meantime. The whole Sunday was really tough I was tired and felt bad - no wonder. Anyways I somehow managed(I didn't PMO for the rest of the day) and decided to delete my account here - that's a standard tactic - every time when I am desperate I create an account here and eventually when I feel like it's ok(it's not) or relapse then delete it out of shame or whatever and if I delete it before relapse then relapse is an inevitable outcome; like past-current blown streak and current-current blown streak. I thought it's gonna be alright but turned out as always...
Anyways Monday was fine but as today... I'm actually ashamed of myself af. It began with light urge(I cut my finger pretty deep so couldn't work properly - I'm an office worker, which is/was sort of self-illusion because I'm writing that post without problems and I edged with cutted finger no problem...) - gave in and did browse some stupid reddit/9gag stuff nothing explicit but it always begin like that, eventually opened hard stuff and the worst thing came - for the first time in my life I was so blind in my urge I did pay for nsfw stuff - subscribed to some onlyfanshoe; decided to PMO since I already fell so low but fortunately it didn't happen. I did delete my reddit and onlyfans account eventually. Those 5$ ain't much but holy fock I actually paid for something like that I'm truly disgusted with myself and decided to edge even more - fock logic, right?
After 4-5 hours I finally stopped - signed in here, canceled my account delete(got like 30 minutes left) and wrote that post.
I swear to you and myself(primarily) no more mindless Internet browsing and PMO! There's no coming back, I really have no choice; because of my Internet Addiction(mainly PMO and gaming) I did waste my past 7 years.
@S1M0NK Good that you shared that. Thats the first step.
Be careful with edging. Some say its even worse than one and done.
I am addicted to prone masturbation.
It starts always the same - light pictures like bikini. Than fantasies and then edging, stoping for a minute but evetually relapsing.
Now I did the first fucking step again.
Browsed the newsweb and already felt like I am not there to read news but I am there only to sort of bump into the spicy pics of celebs.
I feel like I want to ease off a bit, but it always makes it worse.
Today I challenge myself to not watch newsweb at all. Just fuck that. I dont need that. I will focus on my work or reading, being present in conversations or even watching TV.
Day 3/3. Successful hard mode. no urges proceeding to the next step.
Don't feed the beast that will eat you up, feed the animal that will support you when trouble comes.
Good choice and if possible avoid the medium you use. Put the phone away in a place that you can access after you wake up and move a little.
I understand the feeling of helplessness cause you know it was your decision and you made one. Definitely made the wrong one but that doesn't make you less human. Now the first days are really rough and the battle is heavy when starting up. Believe me many of those who have won have failed more times than they thought they would. Don't hate yourself, hate the medium and stay away from it whenever such thoughts come to mind. Go airplane mode and play a game for 30 min. Dont beat yourself over falling, These urges are here to tempt us so that natural procreation can take place. All i can say is that the urges only control you if you let them... But do your best to avoid Porn completely. Its the poison that gives your body control over you. Whenever you have an urge and you feel its gonna make you watch P, M without P. do this for two weeks and you will be smiling at least more often than you are now.
Don't be too hard on yourself my man. We've all been there. Take one day at a time and make your next move the right move.
Day 1 done. How's everyone feeling?