While I still consider myself an addict, there are three things I have learned in the two years I have been dealing with the addiction (I have been aware I am addicted for two years, addicted much more than that): It starts with lack of connection It's all about the brain and retraining it I have a choice It starts with lack of connection From what I have read, all addiction has its roots in the experience of a lack of connection. This fits in my experience - the times I have the urges to PMO are when I feel alone, afraid, anxious, etc. To have true success in dealing with the addiction seems to take establishing nurturing connections with others One of the things that has made the biggest difference for me is telling a few close friends that I am addicted and what I have been going through. It was VERY difficult the first time I did this. It continues to be uncomfortable, and MUCH less so than before It's all about the brain and retraining it Endless gratitude to Gary Wilson, who created http://yourbrainonporn.com/. When I stumbled onto his website was when I realized that I was addicted. This began my recovery. If you haven't looked at that website - stop what you are doing and go there now I have unwittingly trained my brain to go to porn and want more and more What it takes is retraining my brain This takes practice and time The practice can at times be very uncomfortable (just like physical exercise) Sometimes I fall And, like any training regime, the more I stick at it, it pays significant benefits I am not bad, wrong, god doesn't hate me, I am not the scum of the earth I have just unwittingly trained my brain a certain way and what there is to do is retrain it I have a choice I have a choice whether I go to the PC and look at porn or I Get up and go for a walk Phone a friend Go exercise Anything else And, sometimes I forget I have a choice I hope this helps. Thank you all - those who started this site, those who have been on for a while, those who just joined. You presence makes a difference for me.