3 weeks- but all for nothing

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by Daviesmark1, May 20, 2017.

  1. Daviesmark1

    Daviesmark1 Fapstronaut

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    so this is he longest streak I have ever completed... The main reason for it was because of this Spanish girl I have been seeing- this was driving me on to keep going.

    We've been talking, going to the library, coffee, gym and I was sure that she liked me, where I am living in student accomodation, there are like 5 other guys that like her too... So they all prey like a pack of wolves around her.

    When she comes down she always sits next to me to talk, when we message she will send kissing face emojis when saying bye, some of the things she has said to me, I thought everything was pointing in the right direction, but she gets the attention of all these guys and seems to love it, grabbing as much of it as humanly possible, walking to the clubs last night with her arms wrapped around w guy in the group ( who knows I like her)

    She agreed to go out for drinks with me this weekend, but I really don't feel like it now, she told that she met up with a medical student for dinner again last night, who she met like a week ago. She has all these people at her disposal, and I'm pretty sure I'm not her first choice :(

    I am only 18 and she is 21, which is another reason I think she doesn't see it, she's been giving me all the right signals, but just watching her with other guys just makes me sad:/ any chances I had I fucked up last night by getting super drunk and being carried home into my room and throwing up, she was there too, I'm sure that really impressed her!
     
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  2. Daviesmark1

    Daviesmark1 Fapstronaut

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    So tempted to relapse right now, but I know it won't be worth it
     
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  3. Don't do it, it really isn't worth it.
     
  4. w95chris

    w95chris Fapstronaut

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    If you relapse you are going to prove yourself that you are powerless against this habit.Would you like to be the person that the only thing he accomplished in his life is measured on how many p websites he subscribed and how many times he can relapse in a day?Take it to the chin and move on.Sometimes you feel like you need to give up but that is the moment you need to keep moving forward because better days are coming

    About the girl you like.Have you ever thought that she is doing it to make you jealous?It is just a theory but it could be it.You say it drives you crazy but the point is if you are showing it and the reason that she is doing it is the one i mentioned then it is like adding fuel to the fire.If she does not like you then maybe she likes plenty of attention.In my opinion you have two choices:

    1)Tell her how you feel and if she feels the same way all well and good if not..at least you got that weight of your shoulders
    2)Play the game.Show no interest and she will stop if she sees that there is no response from you.But be careful if you are absolutely sure she likes you then this could work or it could make the opposite,make her think that you just don't care anymore.Risky to say the least

    I recommend option number 1 because it is the most secure and leaves no doubt.Or you could wait and see where this leads you.Up to you to decide but whatever you do DON'T relapse
     
    Last edited: May 20, 2017
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  5. Daviesmark1

    Daviesmark1 Fapstronaut

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    Thanks man:(( I don't know what do right now; I feel so depressed and lonely. I think I will go for option 1; good decision, I will tell her how I feel. Only think I don't know about it how ro word it without sounding childish? E.g" I really like you" makes me sound like I'm 12
     
  6. Comets

    Comets Fapstronaut

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    I would personally go with w95chris' option #2. But that's your decision if you want to make a decision. I hope it all goes well. And plus, this happened to me twice. It's honestly easy to deal with females when you've dealt with one for a while.
     
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  7. w95chris

    w95chris Fapstronaut

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    If you feel depressed don't worry it will go away in time also the loneliness also.Be happy man even if you don't feel like it because if you do so then you will start to feel better and when you feel better you do better.Focus on some of the good things in life

    Well in the worst case scenario if she does not feel the same it will be awkward a lot to say the least but you should try something like this: "For a long time now (or from the moment i saw you if that is the case) i really like you and i want to be with you (or you could say i want us to be together if you feel like it).It kills me seeing you with other guys and i had to get this weight off my shoulders.If you don't feel the same i will understand and move on"

    I really do hope you can find the courage to tell her.Either way think like this:

    I am not in a relationship with her and if i tell her how i feel she will either say that she feels the same or she will say that she does not.If she likes me then all good and well if not then i will be able to move on knowing that she was not for me.It is a win-win situation so up to you my friend
     
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  8. Daviesmark1

    Daviesmark1 Fapstronaut

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    Thanks bro :) your comments are helpful and very true. I'm a bit worried about our friendship after I tell her this, that's the only thing I am worried about. She suggested to me going out for dinner like twice now, which I agreed to doing after i finished my exams- which was yesterday, I'm the only one in the group she's been messaging to meet up with outside of where we stay e.g going running and a few of the others have hinted at her liking me.. I really thought she does but now I'm second guessing myself as it's clear there's s number of people who like her too and she's evidently weighing up the options
     
  9. Daviesmark1

    Daviesmark1 Fapstronaut

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    Thank you :)
     
  10. I would add an option #3. Have an abundance mind-set and realize the truth, that there are plenty more fish in the sea its as simple as that. If she is not interested in you then so what? You will meet plenty more girls and then you will see that it does not matter anymore you have options. This is what I have learnt from my years doing online dating. You meet this amazing girl you think she could be the one but for whatever reason it does not work out. And then for a short period you wonder if you will ever meet someone like that again. And then BOOM when you least expect it out of the blue you find someone else! You see there is no reason to put any girl on a pedestal because they are not as special as you make them all out to be.

    We are all the same you only think she is this goddess because she is so attractive and every guy wants her. Well there are loads of girls like that and you know what some of them are really going to be into you so why are you chasing tail? Be an alpha not a beta you can do whatever you want just believe in yourself.
     
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  11. w95chris

    w95chris Fapstronaut

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    @Daviesmark1 i will tell you what i think about things in life.I keep in my mind that everything happens for a reason and if you think that you just missed a good opportunity then think again because something better is on its way.Tell her how you feel and if she is not interested in you then ok no bad feelings just move on because you will find somebody else and you will be grateful afterwards that you found out and were able to move on.Imagine being stuck in the unknown and every day not knowing if she likes you and not being able to move on...that would be painful to say the least

    Anyway it is up to you.Just be confident and believe in yourself
     
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  12. Daviesmark1

    Daviesmark1 Fapstronaut

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    Thank you for your comments- appreciated. The reason I like her isn't because there a lot of other that like her too though, I liked her from the moment I met her and others that like her is out of my control, I can't help the fact that others like her. I don't go for girls who have massive ego's and the popular ones who everyone likes as they're often the worst kind of people. She's not like that, she's just a very nice person which is why a lot of people like her I think :)
     
  13. Daviesmark1

    Daviesmark1 Fapstronaut

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    I agree that everything happens for a reason too. Thank you!
     
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  14. Happy Man

    Happy Man Fapstronaut

    You never get a super hard erection for a real girl if you relapse.

    It ain't worth it
     
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  15. Lightseeker

    Lightseeker Fapstronaut

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    Truer words were never spoken...
    No matter what happens with this girl, you are doing these for yourself pal, never forget that.
     
  16. NoBrainer

    NoBrainer Distinguished Fapstronaut

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    Jeez, that sounds tedious. And frustrating. There's nothing like jealousy to give you a good kick in the gonads.. :oops:
     
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  17. Daviesmark1

    Daviesmark1 Fapstronaut

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    Tell me about it haha!
     

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