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3 years since recognizing the problem

Discussion in 'New to NoFap' started by lifer, Nov 15, 2013.

  1. lifer

    lifer New Fapstronaut

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    Hello all,

    I am a happily married man with two children.

    Porn was traded like candy during my active duty time in the Army...especially deployed. Hard-drives overloaded with porn of every genre being borrowed pretty much daily. I don't regret, per se, that aspect of deployment, but I never fathomed the damage I was doing to myself.

    Anyway, I have been a civilian now for several years. After a big confrontation with a girlfriend about 3 years ago, I realized I was a porn or sex addict. When I met my wife, I confessed the porn addiction upfront and she monitored my blocking software since we dated.

    There were times, however, that I found a way around the software. Most recently, using K9, I was able to disable the driver and browse porn openly while the wife and one child were out of town. Prior to that, it had been a good several months since my relapse and prior to that another several months.

    I feel like I have had good progress, but my most recent relapse was so intense it made me feel like there had been zero movement forward. Now, I have the K9 software disabled permanently to help me build a resistance. I think one of the issues has been a lack of resiliency build-up because it has all been restricted. Now, having the temptation and practicing resistance I think I have a good path ahead of me.

    Thanks for having me!
     
  2. Blue

    Blue Fapstronaut

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    Welcome lifer! You're in the right place, and you're not alone. We all have had our problems with porn and excessive masturbation. I'm not sure that fighting temptation and practicing resistance is going to work for you in the long run; it usually doesn't for addicts. What does seem to work well for most people is to educate themselves on the nature of addiction (www.yourbrainonporn.com is a good starting point), to get an accountability partner, and to keep a journal of their progress. Good luck, and feel free to contact me anytime.
     

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