I've been here since June so I'm not really a veteran yet, but it's been enough time to learn a couple of lessons. For overcoming urges, what's been most effective for me has been to stop indulging sexual thoughts and try to cut them off as soon as possible. It's not just the desire to pmo, but any thought that's seeking out or pursuing that sexual jolt of pleasure. That's where the addiction lies for me and that's where the battle has had to take place. I'm not always successful in cutting them off but I've learned that if I don't it can, eventually, lead to a relapse. And when I do cut off the thoughts, it's been helpful to stop for a moment and become aware of what I'm feeling at the moment, usually some type of discomfort or unease that I'm trying to escape from using the feelings of pleasure. Learning just to let those unpleasant feelings be and pass on their own has been important for me. A couple of other things that have been helpful: reading the journals of people on this site who have been here for a long time. They've been inspiring and comforting when I've needed it joining challenges like these coming back and re-starting a challenge as soon as possible after a relapse. The worst thing I did after a relapse was decide to wait a week until re-starting - it became a week of just indulging in pmo whenever I could and letting my mind run wild with it. If you scout around you can find lots of other comments about what other people have found helpful. Congrats for coming here and getting started on it, and I wish you the best on your journey!
