30+ Day fast = Success with my Wife

Discussion in 'Success Stories' started by Elihu, Mar 17, 2020.

  1. Elihu

    Elihu Fapstronaut

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    Hello everyone,

    You can look into my post history to see what I have been dealing with. I want to keep this short.

    It finally happened and I'm so thankful.

    I spent a year "giving up PMO" for my wife because it was messing up my sexual performance. In reality, I would go a month here a few weeks there before I'd go back, sometimes directly to PMO, sometimes just P. She and I would have monthly or even bimonthly episodes of disappointment. She didn't know I was PMOing but was growing frustration. Sex is a BIG deal for her and it wasn't to me. She caught a stash of P on my computer and I "gave it up" twice over the course of a year.

    Fast forward to Feb 16. I was able to reduce the amount of PMO quite a lot but I gave myself an ultimatum. I told my wife if I can't go 90 days w/o it and we don't see an improvement, that I would separate. This wasn't what she wanted but agreed that she couldn't last much longer (though she later told me she is desperate but loves me too much to want to leave).

    So, like before, I let go of MO. Not going to lie, I still look at P, to this day. I do pray and know my wife was praying for me. What has happened as that while I like it, it does less for me when I don't MO with it.

    In any event, she and I increased that amount of times we would attempt sex. My attitude hadn't really changed in a year nor did my performance. Naturally, my genitalia is filling as I hadn't released in over 30 days. I have been here before and typically nothing happens with sex and it's very uncomfortable for me.

    If you haven't figured it out by the start of this post or it's placement in the forum, I had a breakthrough. The last time we attempted to have sex, I felt different, like it was my first time ever doing it. Nothing happened, but I took note it it.

    Yesterday, I was swelling. Definitely not a good look and very uncomfortable. My wife "didn't want to have sex" last night, but I was going to give it a try. I'm a little ambivalent to sex given that I preferred PMO. So we go at it like normal though I kind of cut to the chase. We learned some things that stimulate my body and went at it.

    Typically I get halfway in terms of how hard I get. I will lose it not much soon after I enter my wife. This sucked and I believe I suffered from the self-induced inability to have normal sex due to excessive PMO.

    In any event, we are going at it, and I notice that it was starting to feel good and my mind went a different direction than it had. I felt the surge towards that end and even told my wife I was right (and she was too). There were some mental barriers and I felt like I "lost it" and we stopped. But we went at it again and mega-eruption. Man I tell you, I've never lost so much blow. We took pictures XD, celebrated, ...and cleaned up.

    This is just one big victory since I've never busted in a women before. We've still a way to go, but I can say that I do prefer my wife over PMO. Still like P, but it's more like an art piece rather than my go to.

    I was 16ish years of PMO w/o normal intercourse since youth. For those that have the same issue and might have it for longer, don't give up. That's the main thing. Even when you feel nothing is happening, just jump on your wife and do what you do. I didn't do anything new (and I have some good moves), but the regular PMO numbed any of the goodness sex can provide. I say drop it all, but if you are going to keep P, DON'T GO FURTHER. I believe something will have to give if you don't MO and aren't O-ing in your spouse. We thought it would take more than 30 days. It took regular attempts, full cold turkey on M, prayer, and genuine interest to make something happen and explore me to turn it out.

    My goal is to keep this up and be over it. I'm 34 by the way, and I'm sure my wife is pregnant XD.
     
  2. Di.Do.555

    Di.Do.555 Fapstronaut

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    Keep going mate.
    Channel all your sexual energy towards your wife and she will love it.
    No leakage. In your mund sex = her +0.
    Nothing else except her.
    There is nothing like the female spirit. U give her a bit and she will give you back multiplied .
     
  3. Elihu

    Elihu Fapstronaut

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    In 2 days, we've done it thrice. I've "delivered" twice. No going back now. A lot more fun this way. It's a good feeling. Want to ride this to normalcy. I was a little concerned that it was a fluke, but the fact that I can keep it up and my body is doing different things in the natural than it would when gripped by PMO is even more motivation. I definitely missed PMO (I'm an addict). But in the past week, it wasn't so bad. In the past few days, I don't even think about anymore... like it was replaced with sex... which, you know... is what we want.

    I'm loving it. I want to get there with the Wife +0. I'm not there yet fully. I'm more of a Wife +0 at the start and maybe a thought or 2 to keep me going in the midst. She knows too and is just glad I can put out.
     
    LekkerPotjie and Charfonglee like this.
  4. Di.Do.555

    Di.Do.555 Fapstronaut

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    " i was an addict."
     
  5. ItsSeal

    ItsSeal Fapstronaut

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    But... why do you not get rid of P to? I believe it does huge damage to your views and expectations.
     
    Charfonglee likes this.
  6. Charfonglee

    Charfonglee Fapstronaut

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    I hate to say this, but you absolutely have to give up porn. Your sex life will instantly improve if you just don’t look at porn. By giving yourself porn you are actively ruining your sex life. You must give up porn, get a counselor, go to saa. Trust me, you life will fill with pleasure and success. Not watching porn actually makes sex insanely good, trust me. It feels the best. Especially if she is willing to warm you up with some oral foreplay. Just stop the porn man. You gotta overcome it.

    this is coming from someone who had satisfaction issues before. Take it from me and many others on this platform.
     
    Lilla_My likes this.
  7. Elihu

    Elihu Fapstronaut

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    I hear everyone. We are a bunch of people trying the best we can with what we have. Thank you for the advice.
     
    Charfonglee and Di.Do.555 like this.
  8. PowerfulSRE

    PowerfulSRE Distinguished Fapstronaut

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    Well, good job man. You know have the best motivation to keep going I guess. You have to be strong for your child, for your wife, and at the end for you. Life can be only better. Good luck man!
     
  9. LekkerPotjie

    LekkerPotjie Fapstronaut

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    Thanks for this! I'm in a similar situation and determined to beat this habit and have a normal sex life and improve my life in general. Thank you.
     

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