30+ years of FAPPING and no success stopping on my own. Glad to be here!

Hello!

I will go into my story more in time, but the gist of it is that I am 46 and have been masturbating to porn for over 33 years. I can't even count the number of times I've tried to stop. I feel this addiction has had a hand in making me socially awkward, especially around women, low self esteem, and depression not to mention performance anxiety. I'd like to be free of this so i can enjoy what ever years I have left on this earth. I found this site while searching for help with quitting. I had no idea what FAP meant and I saw many youtube videos labeled as such. This kind of community didn't exist before so it was hard to get support. In fact, I was shocked since I thought with the popularity and mainstreaming of P, I would have thought there would be LESS of a chance for a site like this. I've read the stats years ago on Gary and Marina's site about the effects and although understood them, I just couldn't do it. Ive used this way of coping with loneliness and anxiety since i was a boy and its wired in me for sure. But I must believe I can do this. Others have so that must mean I can too. I want to see women as people, as real. Not objects for my fantasies or pleasure. I also believe P has ruined all my relationships, included my marriage and eventual divorce.

Well, I will really be counting on you all and when i feel an urge will try to post here. There is a lot of info so not sure how it all works, but wanted to post here to get started.

Any help or support is much appreciated!

 

Hey thank you both Decane and Sisyphus for the support and sharing where you are. I think there are times in life where there is strength in numbers and simply knowing and talking with others struggling with the same thing and having a similar goal can only help. I feel perhaps this is the best scenario I've ever had to stop with so much potential support. We can choose to do this, one day at a time!