35 and older accountability, Group 2

Back2BestOfMe said:
Hi @Sam78 sure thing! It´s a great question and also helps me refocus on the goal and why the effort is so worth it.
Definitely, usually I feel the benefits kicking in as soon as 4-5 days after starting a clean strike. The first couple of days are usually still so much focus and effort, as well as some withdrawal symptoms.
Clarity: I see the difference very clear when I relapse. It´s for me like someone has spun me in a washing machine and I got water in my ears. I wasn´t too aware as the clarity comes step by step for me, but when I fall, the contrast is huge.
Energy: I can fairly compare this, as I´m playing padel right now. When I´m sober, I have more energy, I run faster, need less motivation, and play better. So i can see this "fact" based evidence how my energy deteriorates with fapping and this extends further also into the view on life. When I´m off like 2-3 week I start making plans, I got so many ideas what I would like to do and it is like fapping does not allow me to gain perspective of my life. As if p* would be the only interest I could have in the world for my entire life.
On a side note: What I find also worth mentioning is resilience and mood. Especially with my kids I feel the up and downs a lot. When I have a couple of week in a strike, I become much calmer, I feel more peaceful and can also withstand better stress. This in turn helps my sleep better, which I usually have issues with.

Other effects I can confirm: Social abilities are increased, I engage more confidently with people, feeling secure. At the same time I don´t run away and can confront better difficult situations. Clearer skin, not sure what hormones play into that, but rehab makes my skin look way better.

This said, today I start from 0 again ;)
Click to expand...

Thanks for sharing the insight! It helps a lot. I had a 29 day streak and noticed a lot more clarity and stamina. After relapsing I think I felt haziness a little but didn't feel as bad as when I was in the beginning of the streak which I mean to say tells me that abstinence really does boost your strength.... and luckily I didn't binge cause that's when I have extreme withdrawal effects as well...

How are you doing right now? Were you able to kick start another streak?
RightEffort said:
Had a change in my work so more in person and alone and online and I find myself becoming much more tempted and agitated.

I see clearly how there is a direct relationship with feeling isolation and urges. I used chat gtp and it reminded me that its not sex I want its connection and intimacy I am called to have, so I used wim hauf and prayer and connecting within and making conscious effort to share dinner and open myself to invite others into my life, and I am finding a sense of contentment.

If you feel you need someone to help you kick start your healing journey can reach out to me with any questions or requests for prayer, support or guidance. Blessings
Click to expand...

RightEffort said:
Also is the tracker dead? I can not find the button to reset my tracker
Click to expand...

Yeah, that tracker has been down for a while, not sure when they'll restore it...

Sorry to hear about your work situation that's tough. I'm saying a prayer for your now to find more connection and intimacy, I'm sure as you continue inviting people into your life you'll be able to cultivate more and more connection

I'm just starting this new streak and am aiming for the end of July, hoping that this will take my energy to a new level, am also studying anatomy/physiology with hope of finding a cure for my gut issue so I can get more energy and start doing things that can bring healing.

Hope everyone is doing okay right now.
 
@Sam78 I´m at day 21 right now. I have been to vacations and spend time with one of my best friends. It´s a shame we don´t see each other more often as our time together charged my batteries and I felt motivated and energized. I´m now back and trying to keep going on, avoiding the routine which will make me feel stalled. My two goals : continue with low dopamine and mental coaching.
Making my days busy helps in both, I don´t feel stressed nor boredom, both are dangerous triggers. I hope I can keep this up for much longer!

Great to see you feel the energy and clarity too!

Stay strong!
 
Back2BestOfMe said:
@Sam78 I´m at day 21 right now. I have been to vacations and spend time with one of my best friends. It´s a shame we don´t see each other more often as our time together charged my batteries and I felt motivated and energized. I´m now back and trying to keep going on, avoiding the routine which will make me feel stalled. My two goals : continue with low dopamine and mental coaching.
Making my days busy helps in both, I don´t feel stressed nor boredom, both are dangerous triggers. I hope I can keep this up for much longer!

Great to see you feel the energy and clarity too!

Stay strong!
Click to expand...
Congratulations on the new streak. I seem to recall feeling better around that time. and that you are finding a good balance between stress and boredom, that really is an important key. Tuning into the signals of boredom, stress, etc from my body and mind is something that I've struggled with especially with the all shame I have around my vulnerabilities but I'm going to try to take a page out of your book and strike the balance

Talk to everyone later
 
Sam78 said:
@Back2BestOfMe hope your day is going well and your experiencing a good balance between challenge and comfort
@TurningPages @RightEffort @ANewFocus @FloodAtlantic06 how are you all doing lately?
Click to expand...
Thanks for asking. Since starting my recovery 05/23 I have relapsed twice, once after 9 days, once after the next 38 days. I'm now day 5 no PMO of a 90 day goal. Feeling good about how it's going and have been able to stay accountable to my wife and my NoFAP support group. Hope all is well with you!
 
Whats up friends I am still around - Much less sensual temptations these days but other temptations such as fears has been knocking at the door, but thankful as it inspired me to start fasting again, water fasting helped so much. I did for 24 hours, I felt terrible, but I realized I was flushing out some crappy habits and headaches were actually part of the detox. Then I ate one day and I fasted again for another 2 days this time 10x easier and I felt mental clarity and peacefulness and certainty and my productivity boosted. So I am now refeeding myself again for the weekend perhaps, then I like to do a 4 or 5 day as I learn that doing 4+ days of fasting kicks in autophagy which my body literally regenerates it self.

I defiantly feel a new sense as I feel less urge to eat chocolate and million different type of food, I found myself being content with apple and banana and few eggs.

keeping all of you in conscious realization of your onenss with the source of all good. Talk soon
 
Sam78 said:
Thanks for sharing the insight! It helps a lot. I had a 29 day streak and noticed a lot more clarity and stamina. After relapsing I think I felt haziness a little but didn't feel as bad as when I was in the beginning of the streak which I mean to say tells me that abstinence really does boost your strength.... and luckily I didn't binge cause that's when I have extreme withdrawal effects as well...

How are you doing right now? Were you able to kick start another streak?




Yeah, that tracker has been down for a while, not sure when they'll restore it...

Sorry to hear about your work situation that's tough. I'm saying a prayer for your now to find more connection and intimacy, I'm sure as you continue inviting people into your life you'll be able to cultivate more and more connection

I'm just starting this new streak and am aiming for the end of July, hoping that this will take my energy to a new level, am also studying anatomy/physiology with hope of finding a cure for my gut issue so I can get more energy and start doing things that can bring healing.

Hope everyone is doing okay right now.
Click to expand...


Hey brother! Thank you for your response and prayers.

I am doing 10x better. Its nice reading these posts because I forgot how much better I actually feel.

I started a new position which is a lot of work but its also becoming a lot of fun as Im learning how to do well in serving others and it can also be very financially rewarding.

Sorry to hear about your gut challenges, I am also lifting you in prayer now!

Also I am convinced that our body has everything it needs to reset it self, and with the right research any anyone can benefit from its own body's natural healing mechanism. (see my last post about my resent fasting experience)

This is one of my fav doctors on this topic in case anyone is interested.

 
RightEffort said:
Hey brother! Thank you for your response and prayers.

I am doing 10x better. Its nice reading these posts because I forgot how much better I actually feel.

I started a new position which is a lot of work but its also becoming a lot of fun as Im learning how to do well in serving others and it can also be very financially rewarding.

Sorry to hear about your gut challenges, I am also lifting you in prayer now!

Also I am convinced that our body has everything it needs to reset it self, and with the right research any anyone can benefit from its own body's natural healing mechanism. (see my last post about my resent fasting experience)

This is one of my fav doctors on this topic in case anyone is interested.

Click to expand...
Thanks for the link. A family member mentioned him as well so I’m curious to see what he says.
 
ANewFocus said:
How could you have handled the stress better? Sorry to hear about your wife.
Click to expand...
Could have meditated, journaled, gotten off all devices and done anything I enjoy such as music or reading.

On top of the medical stuff , our marriage is just falling apart and we are supposed to wait until after surgery and recovery to get into couples therapy
I feel like irreparable damage is occurring

I'm questioning if I'm better off alone, but kid deserves both parents
 
TurningPages said:
Could have meditated, journaled, gotten off all devices and done anything I enjoy such as music or reading.

On top of the medical stuff , our marriage is just falling apart and we are supposed to wait until after surgery and recovery to get into couples therapy
I feel like irreparable damage is occurring

I'm questioning if I'm better off alone, but kid deserves both parents
Click to expand...

I can totally relate to that situation wondering if I should stay or leave. One thing I found out is when I find my inner peace and inner joy all answers come to me. So my question is what would be a way for you to find an inner peace and inner joy... What are some of the things you can do more? For me is rising early and having that alone time in silence, going to yoga class or nature, and exercising, and breath work. These usually atune me back to my inner peace.

Here is a 5 min breath work which helps a lot to get me out of the head

 
It’s good to be back and present with you guys. I’m 5 days sober. I’ve been busy at work, engaged on NoFap daily. I attended SAA on Monday. I’m re-engaged on Sara Brewer’s program.

This weekend I’m going to engage with my wife, my friends and connect with myself. I’m going to spend more time on Sara Brewer’s program and get back to working on processing my urges.

Sober since July 14.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top