35 and older accountability, Group 2

Checking in with the group. I’m up to 17 days and haven’t had a lot of strong urges. Getting more disciplined on not going to apps that trigger me has helped a lot. Starting to notice that I’m more clear headed as well. I don’t plan on letting my guard down though.

 

Checking in. Made it to day 70 of a 120 day goal. Now that I'm in deeper waters there's no point in swimming back to shore Onwards!

 

Over the last nine months being mostly PMO-free I too discovered how much more time I had available to live life doing better things. And for sure, my relationship with wife, my children, and friends improved dramatically. I can't overstate the improvement in my overall well-being that occurred without the hangover of my PMO behavior - lying, shame, guilt, constant sexualization of every image and situation. As I imagine what would my family say to me if they saw my PMO behavior, and how I would explain it to them - it makes life so much easier to avoid that embarrassment. Stay strong everyone.

 

I went from spending 700 minutes PMO to only 200 the last few weeks. That’s a big drop for me and need to keep pushing that down to 0. I need to find ways to give more of that time I gained in meaningful ways. Give to my wife. Give it to myself through exercise to be healthy and lose weight; to recover; to enjoy moments of meaning like reading poetry; and to live life with more purpose.

 

Checking in. Rough day - Low mood, strong urges. Trying to roll with the punches. Caught myself itching to type naughty words into google and to edge in the shower but managed to stop short of doing either. Don't want to cave just because of rough patch.

 

Hope you stay strong

 

Hard day for me too. I did some exercise and just tried to accept the flat line type day and boredom. It will pass and it’s better than using porn. Porn will drain my energy, waste my time that I could spend with wife or exercising, contribute to a culture I don’t want to support, and put me at risk professionally and personally.

 

Totally agree @ANewFocus. Woke up this morning with way more energy and positivity - No exaggeration, I got more done by 10:30 a.m. then I did all of yesterday. Gloomy clouds eventually clear up.

 

@ANewFocus - stay strong through this weekend and get past the 14-day hurdle which can be a tough one physiologically. Reach out here, contact an AP if you have one, leave your phone aside, don't sit by the computer, do something with wife or family, whatever it takes. Get through these next two days - you can do this!

 

Thank you man. I’m trying to just accept the boredom and take care of myself. If I’m bored with too much time, get on stationary bike and ride.

 

I have read the rules and would like to join if there is space. Currently on day 41 of no PM. If not I'd love to be directed to one with space for over 30s one.

 

Thank you for the various tips, it's really helpful. My personal situation is still pretty tough, especially on the family and couple side, my wife and I are both running out of energy. My recent resets showed me that being unhappy and stressed leads me to want to watch porn, and when I do, it makes me less happy and more dissatisfied with who I am... It's a vicious circle, and I want to get out of it.

 

I have read the rules and would like to join this group... please put me on a waitlist if that's still a thing. I'm new to nofap, but have been in therapy since January... I had a 60 day streak going, but recently relapsed (hence joining here for more support)


Thanks!

 

It really is our life and recovery’s work to find what meets our needs and try to live in a way that we can have purpose and pleasure and an environment where we can grow authentically. I’m trying to find that for myself the last month. It has meant taking a break from over promising and over delivering at work. Then as I use porn less, I find I have more time to live and how do I use that time to meet my life’s needs.

 

Day 28:

I'm glad to say that I read your post, this post, around the time you posted it, I was too busy to reply at the time. It was around day 20 for me and I was still struggling but this post and others here on this thread helped snap me out of it. And since then (day 20) until now, day 28, things have been basically easier again.

I don't know when there will be another difficult time, but for now everything is going well. Thank God!

 

Fantastic. I'm struggling at the moment so really could do with the boost. Thank You

 

What are you struggling with?

I’m doing better. Not very tempted. I had my second covid 19 shot and it laid me up for 15 hours. I don’t have lots of work stress. I’m trying to use this time of calm to get a stream and prepare for the next battle life brings my way. Maybe I won’t need porn just to get through it.