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Discussion in 'Accountability Partners' started by artifact, Nov 24, 2018.
Congrats on your 60 days! That is my current goal.
Hey guys, sorry I did not update the ranking yesterday. I fell asleep early last night, but will update it tonight. Otherwise, it's been a successful weekend for me.
No problem. I'll stop. Just thought I'd bring some levity to what's usually a heavy discussion. By the way, it just turned Year of the Rat yesterday in the lunar calendar. Celebrations all over Asia. Just sayin'.
It's great to see some good streaks on board these days. Keep going everyone. Also, finished up "Think and Grow Rich" the other day and I definitely recommend it. I feel it has given me a bit of boost this last week. Some of you might find it helpful.
I'm re-reading (listening to it on Spotify) it now. I think it would make a good drinking game to drink every time he says BURNING DESIRE. Good job Rask, I hope it helps you.
Suturday was a nice day , i went out to a stand up comedy show and then for a couple of drinks...at least this is what we were supposed to do because we returned home at 8:30 in the morning..lol I don't even remember when was the last time i did that.
I flirted with 2 different women after a lot of months since my last time.
As i am trying to get my confidence with women back, since my porn addiction took a lot of that from me, i am gonna try to do that more regurarly now.Ohh that young one was so nice and sexy and i can tell she was intrested...
The problem is that the next day i woke up with a big hangover and a headache and with that weak feeling that you don't know what do to with your life when you are like that..
I feel like in situations like that my brain is completely wired with porn consumption.When i woke up, after making my coffee while that girl from the last night was still in my mind and that weak feeling from hangover , it was almost immediate reaction to open a porn site , "just to check out what's new"...
I stayed there about 30 minutes, fighting with myself not to do it...Finally in just a single moment without thinking much of it i just closed my browser and went out to eat something..
I spended the rest of the day searching for information about porn addiction ,seeking information about psychology and stuff like that and today i feel much better.
I guess it's a small win.
I understand your point but maybe going a little of the topic every now and then is not that bad.
well done! We don’t have to go in circles, relapsing every time the opportunity presents itself. I like to think that we spiral up and we never end up in the same place. It might feel the same but you’re one ring up, having developed a new strategy, new defence mechanism. Sounds like you just went up on the spiral!
I find that winter is tough for me. I feel like I’ve been here before and I really enjoyed erotica to relax, which would then become porn. I still have the urges, but I find them much more muted and far off most of the time. Thankfully my defence mechanisms are working today.
You are right about the spiral theory this is how this thing works and thank you for your motivational words.
I think winter is a 4-5 months period full of triggers..It's a little depresing by itself..
Your streak allows you to keep those urges muted easier than you did.You have already done the difficult part.If you manage to reach a year or so with good streaks then rewiring your brain is easier because the memories from relapsing days start to blur.Next winter you will not even remember how it is to relapse on a cold day just because this is winter.
For me this winter is more difficult than the last one because i quited my job 3 months ago.Atm i am trying to read and refresh some things as i am preparing myself for an interview about a position i am really interested.The problem is that i don't know when exactly it will come or if i will succeed and aside from that i have so much free time that i don't know what to do.I used to have so many hobbies but they joy i get now is not as it used to be.And it's not because i am getting older , i really feel like 25 , it's because of porn addiction and the damage i did to my brain the last 4-5 years.I know that and that's what keeps me fighting now.I am fighting because i miss the days i used to have fun with almost everything in life.
If that porn addiction wasn't around maybe i would be happy with so many free hours , lol, but right now i have to be cautious.
I'd be passed out on the bathroom floor before the 1st chapter ended.
Monday night and got through the weekend. Kept busy...pretty pleased I'm almost into double figures.
Sounds more like a HUGE win. The biggest moments are when you are right on the edge of the fence like that, and can go either way. You were sitting there, right in front of your computer, all it would have taken was a click.... when I am in those moments those happy chemicals are flowing like a waterfall in my head and it is all but impossible to say no. But you didn't do it, even while in a hangover funk which makes it so much worse. Good job man. Keep it up.
I can tell today will be tough. Kind of a foggy. Reading my journal was encouraging the other day. I feel like I’m making progress and I will be able to get through the next couple of days.
Big pointless fight with my wife today, feeling down. Just kind of feeling defeated at the moment.
I hate those. I usually stew for too long and let it get to me. Re-engaging with her (if she open to it) usually puts me at ease. I use to ignore or avoid conversation and that is the worst. Just drags out the inevitable. Good luck!
This and “it makes me feel like X when Y” really makes it go better than “it makes me mad when you” lol
Checking in. Our vacation has been fantastic so far! Kinda wishing the kids weren't here so the wife and I could have some alone time lol, but it's been much needed and we're all having fun. Hope everyone is having a good week so far.
I don't really want read jokes about porn and fapping. It is not a laughing matter to me. I have spent my whole life trying to beat this shit.
I have been in that position again at the past and usually i couldn't resist to those "happy chemicals" (that term is funny though ).
Thank's for engouraging me man!
I use to put a little humor in every difficult situation in my life , even in more serious staff like death , it usually helps me and encouraging me a lot but i understand that those jokes could be a trigger for someone else.
I didn't thought about that so yes , you are right.