35 and Older Accountability Group

Discussion in 'Accountability Partners' started by artifact, Nov 24, 2018.

  1. tonyk1982

    tonyk1982 Fapstronaut

    @Merry Terry @GottaBFree - Guys, really appreciate your thoughts here. Great explanations of the addict behavior, and solid reminders and encouragement to stay clean. Very helpful to me. Thanks.
     
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  2. discovery

    discovery Fapstronaut

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    Even for people who do not believe in a higher power at all (atheists) it is possible to find spirituality. And spirituality is very powerful and effective. Having a focus on and appreciation of nature, beauty, peace, love, friendship, connection, etc. These all are spiritual forces that no one can deny exist in the world. Everyone can tap into the power of spirituality.
     
  3. Rebooter13

    Rebooter13 Fapstronaut

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    New weak new streak..
    Recently i've been relapsing a lot , the positive thing though is that most of the times i am not using p but i am going to chatrooms or doing it by watching photoes.
    I strongly believe the main problem for myself is p and m.If there is not porn available there is no masturbation.So this way i am trying to find something like a substitute and rewire my brain by at least using some imagination on it (a skill that i think i lost the last years because of porn).

    The truth is that i was hoping for a better month but since i am not regurarly going back to porn i can say i am happy at the moment and my mood is still on high levels.
    Finally after i got started on my now job (which is much better than i was expecting) my free time got reduced a lot so there are times that i am avoiding watching p because i feel like i don't want to waste my free time with that
    I will not talk about a big streak but i really hope for the next month to find a balance in my schedule and fill it with more hobbies and activities.

    Finally yesterday night i deleted some accounts from several distructing sites and chat rooms.
    I kept only Facebook and Twitter but those were never much of a problem for me.

    And yeah...that cute girl from my workplace today was very playfull with me.. :p
     
  4. Jerky

    Jerky Fapstronaut

    Just read an article that states intensive exercises do indeed increase testosterone, especially full-body workouts incorporating all major muscle groups. This would indeed increase libido as well, also self confidence and overall positive mood changes. The only catch is that if this does lead to relapse then all those positive benefits go right down the drain. Use the T buildup to further training to gain in strength and mental discipline. I can't say that working out is better than sex but it sure is better than PMO that's for sure!
     
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  5. Tylerdarko

    Tylerdarko Fapstronaut

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    Sorry. I’ll work on that.
     
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  6. jamesgreen85

    jamesgreen85 Fapstronaut

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    Hi,
    I relapsed yesterday when hungover. I will make a big effort to quit drinking.
     
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  7. Merry Terry

    Merry Terry Fapstronaut

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    Today my mantra was: "Frustration. Disappointment. Insecurity. Blue balls." I repeated this every time a thought came up to do PM. Because that's the 4 results I would have gotten if I had done PM. And that mantra sure as hell took the temptation out of it.

    (The blue balls part is because my addiction is to edging, and believe me, that's not good for your balls.)
     
  8. Rebooter13

    Rebooter13 Fapstronaut

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    Kinda bored with some erges today.
    The thought of logging in to some sites or/and watch some p came to me like 6-7 times since i returned home.If i still had around those videos and accounts i would have already be on my way to relapse.Even now my mind is still looking for alternatives.After i spend some time here reading some posts i am going to load a video game i am enjoying playing the last days..
    I am observating my thoughts and it's kinda funny, the first momment i think about logging in to ig and the next momment i think "hey you deleted this account 2 days ago, you can't go there...then after a while the loop starts again.At the end of the day maybe that's a good way to train your mind.
     
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  9. Rebooter13

    Rebooter13 Fapstronaut

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    That's a good way to fight this but maybe you should consider add some more positive mantras as well.What about "more free time, clear mind,self respect" etc.. ;)
    MAybe this way you can chear up a little and let your brain see the benefits of NoFap and not the bad concequenses of p.
     
  10. Rebooter13

    Rebooter13 Fapstronaut

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    Usually when i work out daily i make longer streaks.Exercising increases energy which in our age could be very beneficial and yes it increases libido as well but in my case it makes me feel better because i feel like i didn't lost it completely from porn.That results a boost in my confidence as well, not to mention the other benefits we all are aware off.
    I understand not all things are working the same way for all of us but i suggest to everybody here to give it a try.In the beginning it's not going to be easy but after 10-15 days your body will start to ask for it and as soon as you start noticing the benefits, your mind will start to ask for it as well.
    If anyone of you here is thinking about starting working out but you feel like bored or something then start with 15-20 minutes per day and see how it goes but don't skip a day unless you feel very fatigue.I am sure in 2-3 weeks it will be easy 30-40 minutes.And when you start noticing the difference in your body and your mood then..who knows??
     
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  11. Merry Terry

    Merry Terry Fapstronaut

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    I get what you’re saying, but for me in this phase, I need to remind myself of why PM sucks, because I keep relapsing after 3-4 weeks when I just see the positive and everything’s great and I start thinking ‘surely, a little bit of PM can’t do so much harm’, and so on. I need to remind myself what PM is as soon as I even slightly consider it.
     
  12. Timber

    Timber Fapstronaut

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    Gents, October is upon us. I am planning to do a sober October thing and add “no P” to it as well. No M is ideal but if I lapse, I won’t freak out. The idea is I consciously don’t put trash into my mind and body. I eat well, I avoid sugar as much as possible, I don’t drink booze, I stay off social media, I stay off anything remotely like P. Anyone else wants to join me? It’s only 31 days...

    PS. Reading some of these posts about tough relationships breaks my heart! I have nothing to suggest other than to say, pour yourselves out in service to the other. Relationship troubles are usually two big egos smashing together. You can only control one of those egos.
     
    Last edited: Sep 29, 2020
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  13. Pirate3819

    Pirate3819 Fapstronaut

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    Reset again... I fall down, but I will keep getting up!
     
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  14. tigate

    tigate Fapstronaut

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    Anybody here struggling on withdrawals? I just turned 35 but started nofap last year (August). Since then, I have relapsed a number of times. Now, I think I'm on track since I'm able to make it a month but the withdrawals are lingering. Anyone who has similar experience?

    P.S.: I have gained weight of 10 to 11 lbs. I'm not sure if this is still related to my reboot.
     
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  15. Count me in for the sober October. First one out is a rotten egg. :D
     
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  16. GottaBFree

    GottaBFree Fapstronaut

    @artifact @Timber I'm in. Noctober. I need another 10+ days to focus on PM then I'll add the diet in. I'm doing good on no psubs etc... Just trying to not lose focus.

    @tigate yep. I'm there right now. I feel like my brain removed lots of dopamine receptors and I'm expecting another 60-90 days of regular reminders PM is stupid.
     
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  17. tigate

    tigate Fapstronaut

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    @GottaBFree , tell me more about your NF journey. Feel free to dm me or shall I dm you instead? Thanks.
     
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  18. emanuel_free

    emanuel_free Fapstronaut

    Powerful phrase. Like someone would say we should put our egos on a cross and deny ourselves. ;) The psychiatrist M. Scott Peck said that to really listen to other person, is required putting yourself aside.
     
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  19. GottaBFree

    GottaBFree Fapstronaut

    It's nothing unique. I'd suggest reading up on yourbrainonporn.com if this is new. We think it's some unusual struggle but it's simple brain chemistry and the things we tell ourself about PM are wrong when you unwrap it.

    I've also got a journal that documents my journey that you are free to check out.
     
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  20. Onwards and upwards my friend....just start small like 1 day of abstinence...then post on here and try for another day...one day at a time to build a streak
     
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