35 and Older Accountability Group

Discussion in 'Accountability Partners' started by artifact, Nov 24, 2018.

  1. Jerky

    Jerky Fapstronaut

    Wow. I am doing way too much. As usual. If i'm not abusing my body one way i'm abusing it some other way. Now it's caffeine. Coffee and energy drinks. It's not the substance. It's the addict. I am focusing now on my caffeine abuse, and it is abuse. Tonight was scary. I consumed over 1000mg throughout the day. Nausea and panic. I don't want to push myself any more. I want peace within myself. Caffeine is another addiction of mine. It needs to go. I'm dealing with the crash as i type this. And its relevant since it has silenced all of my urges, which lately are in overdrive. Feeling detached. Yuk.
     
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  2. Nash78

    Nash78 Fapstronaut

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    Am I in this group? I said yes but not sure as I don't see anywhere to go in this group on my profile. Thanks.
     
  3. You were on the waiting list at one time but you did not activate your counter, which is a requirement to be in the group. If you activate your counter I will put you back on the waiting list.
     
  4. Nash78

    Nash78 Fapstronaut

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    I started masturbation at the young age of 12, and I am 42 now. How many days/ months you guys think will be required to reboot my brain? I am going hard-mode. Thanks.
     
    artifact likes this.
  5. @Merry Terry - Congrats on your 30 days! That is a great achievement.
     
  6. Nash78

    Nash78 Fapstronaut

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    Thank you for your reply. I am sorry. I am completely new to this forum and finding it hard to move around. I would activate the counter but where to go for that? Thanks.
     
  7. Nash78

    Nash78 Fapstronaut

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    I am on my 57th day and I really need to join a group that is for older people like me. Thanks.
     
  8. Nash78

    Nash78 Fapstronaut

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    I think I have activated the counter. Could you please confirm that? Thanks.
     
    artifact likes this.
  9. Nash78

    Nash78 Fapstronaut

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    1000 mg is a lot of caffeine. It may hurt your kidney in a long run. You should reduce your caffeine intake.
     
    Jerky likes this.
  10. David2018

    David2018 Fapstronaut

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    So much in my head today.
    Even though I went to a chatroom for 1 hour today, that's not the worst. It's not 3 or 5 hours. And it wasn't days of it. I had none the 2 days before. So not the worst.
    Also, just got a lot of hard work done on my computer without going to porn/chatrooms. It feels so good. Feels better than porn. I'm the opposite of a werewolf . Once a month, I change. I become myself. I really accomplish things. Then I go back to porn addict.

    Also been listening to a really good audio book about sex addiction. If anyone is interested it's called "Breaking the Cycle" by George N Collins. It's on Audible. I'm realizing that I was exposed to a lot of things that weren't normal when I was a kid. I mean sex related things. I wasn't molested or anything. But I stumbled into it when I was maybe 12. I can see how different my own kids are at the same ages. I didn't see sex or females the way a regular person should. I know it.
     
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  11. Merry Terry

    Merry Terry Fapstronaut

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    Thank you! I must admit I have done some peeking in this streak (without M'ing or even getting aroused), which in previous times I would have counted as a relapse. But I wanna try to see the effect of being a little less hard on myself and in that way seeing the days go up and getting encouraged to keep doing better, instead of having the discouraging effect of staying in the low numbers every time.
     
  12. Circleinthesquare

    Circleinthesquare Fapstronaut

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    Thursday check in - going for 7 days and now on 3....
     
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  13. Timber

    Timber Fapstronaut

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    Day 29 of sober October.

    no P! I lingered on some racy ads but nothing crazy. This week I feel the urge to look though. It’s been almost two months of no P for me.

    i M’ed 4-5 times this month. I am learning to be kinder to myself but I also wish I had more will power when it comes to sexuality. I hope it will come as I continue to avoid P.

    still no booze (with one exception, being drinking on a date with my wife last week).
     
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  14. tonyk1982

    tonyk1982 Fapstronaut

    Day 45 - @Merry Terry mentioned "taking a peek". I was wondering if it would have the same effect as it used to. I've been feeling pretty strong lately so as an experiment I had a look at a P site. Whatever grasp these images used to have on my brain, at least today in this moment, is substantially gone. It was almost like I was looking at a blank screen. The imagery was of no interest to me. I clicked on a couple of pics and nothing, no response from me in any way. I closed the site and went about my day. Now, I have to be very vigilant that this peek didn't crack open a door to acting out that I'll come back to at some point in the near future. But I followed up this experiment with my daily affirmation reading to reinforce my good habits and I guess the "re-wiring" of my brain that might be happening. Something positive is happening because I would have not responded (eg. no response) in this way to these images four months ago before I started nofap. In a way this experiment was a very positively reinforcing action - there was absolutely no attraction to viewing P, so I don't feel any need to go back. I ain't missing anything. So friends, success is possible. Stay on your path to improvement. Every moment, every hour, every day of staying clean creates more possibilities for you to become free of the PMO addiction and to become a better man. Be Strong All.
     
    Last edited: Oct 29, 2020
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  15. Jerky

    Jerky Fapstronaut

  16. tonyk1982

    tonyk1982 Fapstronaut

    All good points. And thank you for the reminder. I won't be trying that "experiment" again.
     
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  17. Jerky

    Jerky Fapstronaut

    Indeed. The temptation is great. I tell myself it's 'so easy to look stuff up' and 'what's the big deal?' I've been on such thin ice though lately. I know a reset is in my future. I just cant allow myself to look at P. Especially not after all i've been made aware of. I just can't allow myself to but i'm still tempted to look and want to even more. If that makes any sense.

    For the record, MO makes me feels so much worse when P is involved. I could stand and MO session at this point but i won't be doing that either. At least not today i won't be.

    Tomorrow is another day.
     
    Last edited: Oct 29, 2020
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  18. Merry Terry

    Merry Terry Fapstronaut

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    I often think of what this Buddhist monk says about porn addiction:

    You might find it interesting. Basically what he says (I'll summarize very shortly for you :)) is that the only way of really getting rid of your addiction is by not avoiding it by looking at the porn and just really seeing it for what it is. This is easier said than done of course, and in the past I would take peeks and have no interest in it, but then the memory of what I'd seen would stick with me and lead to a relapse some time later. So, be careful. But I do agree with that Yuttadhammo Bhikkhu that to really grow and progress, you'll have to eventually just look at porn and see it for what it is, and then consciously and calmly decide to walk away from it.
     
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  19. tonyk1982

    tonyk1982 Fapstronaut

    Day 45 - feeling calm. Focused on proper tasks without any distractions of P. What a nice feeling. We all know our triggers and stressors that can appear over the weekend, so let's be aware of that and be ready to deal with those issues if they come up. Stay strong
     
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  20. tonyk1982

    tonyk1982 Fapstronaut

    Thanks for sharing this. Can't say enough about what I am learning from the members here to help battle my addiction. I'm very grateful.
     
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