35 and Older Accountability Group

Day 177. I'm starting to have a LOT of fun interacting with women now. I use to be so "in my head" when engaging before NoFap/Semen Retention. Now, I don't even think. I just say whatever comes up without a care as to whether they'll like it or not. I'm not out trying to hit on women. I'm just talking, engaging in playful banter, etc.

Even when it comes to texting or sending pm's, women are responding to whatever I say almost instantly with a reply. Before, I use to try to think of the perfect opener or a really nice line or something. Nope...not anymore. I've also found women seeming to make it a point to just say "hello". I use to go places and never even talk to a soul. Now WOMEN are coming up to me. It's crazy! There actually may be some truth to the idea that men who retain their seed sending off different vibes to women!

 

I love it, i heard that people can see an aura around the dude who's on nofap/ semen retention. I like it how you are not hesitant anymore to reply whatever comes up to your mind

 

1 week check in. Stay strong.

 

I don't know about an aura but it's definitely something. And truthfully, I think I've just gotten to the point where I am no longer trying to please ANYONE other than myself. Other people's opinion of me is no longer a concern of mine. It's that shift in mindset that has easily been the most impactful for me!!!

 

Not getting going very good at all, but it’s a new day. Taking it seriously and going to take it a chunk of a day at a time. The desire to escape from reality is strong now, so I just need to plan time well.

 

Really interesting what you are saying....have you really gone 177 days without ejaculating? I mean I believe you it's just a really long time and I guess there will have been some wet dream type releases because doesn't the body need to release semen at some stage?

Also what happens when you get with one of these lovely women you talk about and they want to have sex with you...like will you ejaculate then? Or are you not actually currently concerned with sex just enjoying connecting with women?

I guess the issue with me is that I can feel the power of semen retention (currently 14 days and counting since I last ejaculated) but I would like to find a woman and then when I do I'm going to want to have sex with her and her with me so how can I then practice semen retention!!? I mean I know there are apparently ways of orgasming internally but it sounds awful complex practice to master and not for the average Joe

 

Checking in folks....very happy say that I am 14 days of no P and most importantly no M and very little edging which I used to do a lot

So what's changed? So I am currently going through a very protracted, slow and difficult withdrawal from anti depressants after nearly 18 years of near continuous use! I'm only 40 lol how did that happen!
The withdrawals have been horrific at times but I am more than 2/3's of the way there...I recently had a healing session with a little Indian yogi who suggested that semen retention would be a powerful way to supercharge my healing and BOY do I want to heal from this nightmare so I've found it very easy these past 14 days not to M and ejaculate and equally to keep away from P...I loathe P by the way but like all of us can find it incredibly hard to resist especially when I am low and stressed

I also am starting to feel a deep peace within me that was not there before and is perhaps because I am retaining my seed?

 

planning my day ahead is very important thing during recovery , I'm also focusing on my morning and evening routine (ritual) it was hard getting used to this idea in the beginning but with time it got easier, even if I relapse I focus on keep my day organized and commit do other good habits I implement in my daily routine.

 

I recommend to watch this course for everyone, its an eye opener. (simple short infographics course)

https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLE_vQWWxgaiEskIe2DMOZ_gFTURBeWCM_

 

great to hear that brother , we all are proud of you, it doesn't matter which method you follow as long you are making progress

 

@Wanttosucceed YES, SIR! It really has been, now 179 days. If there have been any nocturnal releases, they've been unnoticed.

I was a 20+ yr addict, divorced, struggling financially, struggling mentally, struggling emotionally, with low self-confidence and I knew I needed to change. Getting rid of porn was just the beginning. I'm so different 6 months later.

The girls I interact with are just throughout the course of a normal day. I'm not really that interested in dating. I'm building my business, building my portfolio, enjoying life and that's it! At 46, I was married 11 yrs. I've dated my fair share and I don't have the need or desire to just entertain anyone. When I do eventually date again, they'll have to be able to add something pretty substantial to my life. Until then, I'll just enjoy conversing as I go through my day and continue building my "empire". Lol

And truthfully, I'm perfectly fine without sex.

 

Try not to be too hard on yourself brother this has happened to me recently also...I was having 30 day plus streaks often and then I couldn't go more than a few days! It will return, check in with your motivation, how you feel about porn, what you want to achieve and be gentle on yourself for people human and fallible

 

Checking in

 

Firstly don't beat yourself up, you should be proud of yourself for creating this group to help others.
I had the same exact issue, and the problem was I lacked aspiration ( the person I want to become in the future) I recharged my motivation with visualizing things I want to possess in the future after that I wrote down around 200 reasons why I want to quit PMO, it took me a while to remember them all, every two days I was reading 4-5 of them to keep the momentum. Another thing is you have to go back to the moment before you relapsed and be mindful with why you decided to act out in the first place, self awareness is key ( be mindful with what feelings you're having, understand them and express them in a healthy way ), get up brother , you can do it , aren't you disgusted with starting over and over again ??

Note : I'm still prone to relapse again, but every time I remember the shitty feelings and confusion I had I take the higher road.

 

Reset today

 

Hey. Where's my 6 month medal? Lol

 

I have read the rules and I would love to join this group. I'm resetting today. I have a sense of what my triggers are, but I work from home and the urges really kick in late in the day. I feel like I succumb to those urges once a week or every other week. Then a binge will kick in. Really tired of this. My wife and I are also talking about having a second child and I'm finding it difficult to be ready for those moments.

I'd love to be apart of a community with the same struggles and hopes for recovery. Just want to use this platform to share struggles but also have a place to checkin with people going through similar things.