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45yo gay man, new here, lots of problems to solve

Discussion in 'New to NoFap' started by Deleted Account, Feb 7, 2020.

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  1. Hey guys,

    I am a gay man, 45yo and have been in a relationship with a very patient partner for a long time now. We live in a big city where I have access to anything I could want from a sexual or any other perspective.

    I have always enjoyed wanking to porn. Over the past couple of years, my sessions have gone from 10-15min to an hour or longer. Therefore, I have had to withdraw from many parts of life to find the time and space to do this. I have taken time off work, cancelled plans and always masturbating right up until the moment that I expect my partner home.

    It feels good but it must stop.

    So I am here for a fresh start. I have other issues bundled up with this relative to drugs and Grindr hookups. Not sure how I feel about NoFap as a way of life but I am definitely here to learn other people’s stories and to kick porn habit.

    I am now off work for the month of February. This first week of being off work is supposed to be about relaxing and recharging but I have spent the whole week masturbating instead.

    I will be starting NoFap tomorrow as I will spend today saying goodbye to porn by viewing one last time as I delete files and accounts. Not sure if this is a healthy way to start, but an honest one.
     
  2. Welcome!

    In my opinion, everyone has to find their own way and what works for them. Some people are almost religious in their beliefs in nofap, but certainly not all of them.

    It is awesome that you are trying to work on your problem! You will be amazed how much you can do with a bit of willpower and all the new time in your schedule.
     
    Jorge77 likes this.
  3. Hi and welcome, I‘d say you made a step into the right direction joining this community even though you‘re not certain about the nofap lifestyle. Look at it another way, more like (regaining) an independent lifestyle. Kick the compulsive habit of HAVING TO watch & wank. Don‘t end your life as an addict. Or would you say you can still control it? Guess not. I‘m sure you‘ll find the right support here, recovery and accountability partners, someone to talk to and help you finding out where you stand, what you want and what you‘re willing to bring to the table. There‘s no shortcut, no quick fix, the only way is through the storms of physical and mental withdrawal. Be clear, persistent and patient with yourself and you‘ll grow in strength and confidence. Good luck bud. We‘re in this together.
     
  4. I have been reading other message boards here and am seeing there is definitely a huge range of purity around how people practice NoFap, very interesting/diverse. Thanks guys for the welcome.
     
    kammaSati likes this.
  5. Heyyy welcome to the NoFap forum : ) It's nice to see you here fighting the good fight alongside us!


    First let me go ahead and drop some helpful links for you:

    Getting Started Guide/ Forum Rules / How to Use the NoFap forums/ Glossary/ NoFap Panic button/ Set up your day counter/ Rebooting Resources/ About NoFap/ Support NoFap


    Here is just some advice:


    First and foremost please take a look at each section in the forum, there might be something(s) you may find of big help to you. Feel free to post there :+)


    Then secondly I just advise you to be active on your profile(as there a few active people in the profile section). Please start by choosing an avatar and then make daily status posts to show you're active and needing support/encouragement. They've also got a neat little feature that shows freshly posted statuses for all users to see. People will find your profile and give you encouragement/support.


    Theres a portion of people who love communicating in the profile section..(it should be and is )mostly spportive talk but it doesn't hurt to deviate from supportive talk. It would be great to have you join in and support others in the threads, profiles, and journal. Make sure and be grateful for the help you received and give some help after receiving some. Invest in some people's journeys. We could always use your help and in return you shall receive some as well!


    Thirdly, You should also highly consider creating a public journal/log (in the appropriate section for you) and write about your days in more depth for us members to follow along your journey and offer support to you by way of posting in your journal.


    Last but not least: Good luck on your journey here, make sure to really give it a try with all your heart!
     
    Deleted Account and kammaSati like this.

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