5 Months of Monk Mode: the Good, the Bad and the Ugly

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by Fenix Rising, May 31, 2019.

  1. Fenix Rising

    Fenix Rising Fapstronaut

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    The Good:
    1. Lost interest in porn and masturbation
    2. Improved willpower and self-control
    3. Gained lots of free time
    4. Started implementing lifestyle changes


    The Bad:
    1. Flatline/No libido
    2. Lack of energy and brain fog
    3. Insomnia

    4. Inflammation in the Joints

    The Ugly:
    1. Depression and Anxiety worsened
    2. Anhedonia

    3. Social withdrawal
    4. Addiction replacement -> compulsive web browsing/YT watching

    That summarize it quite nicely. I had lots of accidents in last 150 days (broken leg, hit by a car, minor back operation) so ride wasn't as smooth as expected. Maybe if I could implement uninterrupted exercise into my daily routine, progress would be much better. But that's life, shit happens. Show must go on. There is still a lot of room for improvement.

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    Last edited: May 31, 2019
  2. BigOne79

    BigOne79 Fapstronaut

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    Hey Fenix! I believe you are doing great and you will come out of all of that in a bit more time. Just keep at it and hopefully your leg is healing up and doing better. I can understand how bad it can feel if you cannot move around as much as you want in the middle of all that is happening right now. My anhedonia while still on first monk mode didn't go away until about for or five months. Now I can actually listen to music and feel happy but it was hard there for awhile.

    An hones question and not sure if anyone on here or anywhere else has this problem but I feel like I was born with and never diagnosed with autism spectrum disorder. I believe now I used PMO to hide this but never knew it before. I have never gotten a test up to this point in my life for it either. I still find it hard to want to be in a relationship and have had chanced the last four months going on dating websites. I am thinking of getting with the General physician and getting this checked out.
     
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  3. Hey, may I ask you what do you think is responsible for your brain fog? I always thought that would go away with more willpower and selfcontrol and less PMO.

    But congrats on your achievement! Hopefully you will get to bad and ugly away aswell! Are you very social or unsocial?
     
  4. arkad1

    arkad1 Fapstronaut

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    That's not the amazing superpowers and woman attraction they talk about, right?
     
  5. Fenix Rising

    Fenix Rising Fapstronaut

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    Thanks man, yeah we need to be patient… As for the autism, I believe autism is measured in Bell Curve not I have it or I don't have it black or white diagnosis. It's impossible to draw a distinct border between autism and only having introverted personality traits. You can take a quick test if you're concerned. I scored 29 (some Autistic traits - Aspergers Syndrome), but I really don't consider myself being an autist. Just as being somewhat introverted person who enjoys having lots of privacy. It's nothing wrong with that.
    https://psychology-tools.com/test/autism-spectrum-quotient
     
  6. Fenix Rising

    Fenix Rising Fapstronaut

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    Thanks man. I don't know what causes brain fog. It can have lots of causes and it's very commonly mentioned in PAWS https://www.healthline.com/health/brain-fog
    I'm more of an introverted person.
     
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  7. Fenix Rising

    Fenix Rising Fapstronaut

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    I'm not sure about that. I do find women in public places flirt with me more then they used to. Maybe it's because I'm in better shape, maybe it is the abstention, impossible to know. There is some scientific evidence that women prefer scent of men with higher testosterone and lower cortisol levels which can be both influenced by weightlifting (boost T) and aerobic exercise (lowers cortisol), but who really knows. https://www.livescience.com/28812-women-prefer-smell-of-manly-guys.html
     
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  8. homo_sapien the 7th

    homo_sapien the 7th Fapstronaut

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    If it is worsening consult a Doc.
    non- selective beta blockers should help you from anxiety attacks,
    because I am taking those prescribed by my Doc.
     
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  9. TheDiamondTention

    TheDiamondTention Fapstronaut

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    Noooooooo. The bad and the ugly.....
     
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  10. Fenix Rising

    Fenix Rising Fapstronaut

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    Thanks for advice. Thank god I'm not having panic attacks anymore, but I do feel my social anxiety hasn't got any better or even worsened a bit. It really all depends if I workout or not. If I can do an hour of aerobic exercise, I'm OK for the rest of the day, if not I'm all FU. I try to stay away from meds, at least for now.
     
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  11. Fenix Rising

    Fenix Rising Fapstronaut

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    BTW has anyone experienced inflammation in the joints during reboot? It's not very painful, it feels like having a flu all the time.
     
  12. arkad1

    arkad1 Fapstronaut

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    Those panic attacks are related to rhinitis or respiratory problems?
     
  13. moulox

    moulox Fapstronaut

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    Wanted to ask you too lol.

    Been having pain in one of my knees. Sure it is not in the best condition due to playing bball while overweight yet some time after quitting pmo its been aching all over and no matter if it is bent, streched etc even hurts while lying in bed sometimes
     
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  14. Fenix Rising

    Fenix Rising Fapstronaut

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    They looked like a heart attack… heart racing +200 bpm, pressure through the roof. My doc rushed me to a hospital the first time, thinking that I have heart attack.
     
  15. Fenix Rising

    Fenix Rising Fapstronaut

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    Yes, very weird. Maybe it is abstention related. Oxytocin and vasopressin released during orgasm have analgesic properties. Not having O for months means not releasing these substances and possibly making inflammation symptoms worse. Especially Oxytocin has very strong analgesic, anxiolytic, antidepressant and other central nervous system effects. This could also explain why depression and anxiety symptoms worsen in a monk mode for some people (myself included).
    https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4276444/
     
  16. take glucosamine sulfate, it’s extremely good for joints!!!
     
  17. arkad1

    arkad1 Fapstronaut

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    I had the same issue during nofap. First time august 2018.
    Last time last week.
    Couldn't breathe, heart rushing, legs shaking, being sure i'm having a heart attack.

    Doctors found out i have rhinitis and hypertrophic turbinates.

    I think i found out my problem, which is gluten intollerance. Try to take away gluten, sugar and dairy from your diet.
     
  18. Rooki3

    Rooki3 Fapstronaut

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    Maybe you are just clumsy...
    5months and a half has been my record. I haven't had that many accidents, but I have had mood swings. Sleep problems. Irritability. Anxiety. Depression is still ongoing. Somehow, if you think about PMO as an addiction, then it makes sense that you're going through all this. You are weaning yourself of something.

    Sure, you are going to get it replace by something else. But hopefully not as damaging. I can look back amd appreciate it for the pleasure you get when you masturbate, particularly if you're not in a relationship or you don't get to be intimate with anyone. It sucks. And it sucks going through this and still remaining alone. But the truth is that I haven't had a health social upbringing with girls. Never knew how to talk to them, and I am usualy shy around them. Stop PMO is not the magic bullet for it, but it is up there on the "self improvement" part of my life, along with stopping PMO and go out to meet real girls (went out once.... :/ )

    I guess it also gives you space to notice what else is there to you. Maybe you may actually have depression, or anxiety. Maybe your flatline just means that you are not younger as you once were...

    As for energy, can't complain, but I always enjoyed swimming, cycling, and now going to the gym and stuff. The discipline to work on energy for other things is also something that will have to come from you. But there's only a tiny ammount of will power I have per day, and currently I am sort of using not to relapse.
     
  19. Fenix Rising

    Fenix Rising Fapstronaut

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    Interesting. I also have chronic rhinitis and gluten intolerance. I haven't eaten wheat products for more than a decade.
     
  20. arkad1

    arkad1 Fapstronaut

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    Are you eating dairy? Sugars? (Beside fruit sugar i mean)
    Do not eat anything with gluten, check everything before eating.

    Try not to eat cereals at all, maybe only some whole rice...
     

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